{"id":29440,"date":"2018-04-29T17:43:53","date_gmt":"2018-04-29T16:43:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.fjala.info\/?p=29440"},"modified":"2018-04-30T08:54:37","modified_gmt":"2018-04-30T07:54:37","slug":"per-nje-formim-te-plotesuar","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jehonashqiptare.al\/fjala\/per-nje-formim-te-plotesuar\/","title":{"rendered":"P\u00ebr nj\u00eb formim t\u00eb plot\u00ebsuar"},"content":{"rendered":"

(marr\u00eb nga: Giovanni Cucci SJ – Hans Zollner SJ, CHIESA E PEDOFILIA. UNA FERITA APERTA, Ancora 2010, fq. 57-82<\/em>).<\/p>\n

P\u00ebrktheu nga italishtja: Nikolin Sh. L\u00ebmezhi<\/strong>
\nV\u00ebllaz\u00ebria Jeruzalemi i Ri \u02d7 Shkod\u00ebr<\/em><\/p>\n

\n

R\u00ebnd\u00ebsia dhe nevoja e nj\u00eb formimi t\u00eb nj\u00ebsuar dhe t\u00eb plot\u00ebsuar, i aft\u00eb, pra, t\u00eb prek\u00eb aspektet kryesore t\u00eb jet\u00ebs s\u00eb atij\/asaj q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb duke u formuar dhe t\u00eb personalitetit t\u00eb tij, ritheksohet me qart\u00ebsi nga dokumentat kishtare1<\/sup>, si ndihm\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb njohur thirrjen e Zotit, dhe s\u00eb bashku t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00ebn e d\u00ebshirave vetjake t\u00eb thella, t\u00eb v\u00ebna n\u00eb zem\u00ebr prej Tij. B\u00ebhet fjal\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb njohur vetveten q\u00eb t\u00eb njohim Hyjin, parimin themelor t\u00eb mish\u00ebrimit.<\/p>\n

Pik\u00eb arritjeje e d\u00ebshirueshme \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie e thell\u00eb dhe e p\u00ebrzem\u00ebrt me Zotin Jezus, burim i \u00e7do thirrjeje: \u00abEdukimi ndaj nj\u00eb dashurie t\u00eb p\u00ebrgjegjshme dhe pjekuris\u00eb afektive t\u00eb personit, rezultojn\u00eb krejt\u00ebsiht t\u00eb nevojshme p\u00ebr at\u00eb q\u00eb, si prezbiteri, \u00ebsht\u00eb i thirrur p\u00ebr beqari, dometh\u00ebn\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb ofruar, me hirin e Shpirtit dhe me p\u00ebrgjigjen e lir\u00eb t\u00eb vullnetit t\u00eb vet, totalitetin e dashuris\u00eb s\u00eb vet dhe t\u00eb zellit p\u00ebr Jezu Krishtin dhe p\u00ebr Kish\u00ebn. Duke pasur parasysh angazhimin p\u00ebr beqari, pjekuria afektive duhet t\u00eb dij\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00ebrfshij\u00eb, n\u00eb brend\u00ebsi t\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieve njer\u00ebzore me miq\u00ebsi t\u00eb kthjell\u00ebt dhe v\u00ebllaz\u00ebri t\u00eb thell\u00eb, nj\u00eb dashuri t\u00eb madhe, t\u00eb gjall\u00eb e personale, n\u00eb lidhje me Jezu Krishtin\u00bb2<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Magjisteri i Kish\u00ebs, kur flet p\u00ebr formim \u00abt\u00eb plot\u00ebsuar\u00bb, n\u00ebnkupton kat\u00ebr aspekte kryesore: njer\u00ebzor, kulturor, shpirt\u00ebror, baritor3<\/sup>. Pjesa m\u00eb e madhe e problemeve \u00ebsht\u00eb e lidhur me k\u00ebt\u00eb ndarje mes njohjes s\u00eb vetvetes dhe njohjes s\u00eb Hyjit, q\u00eb p\u00ebrkthehet ose n\u00eb nj\u00eb shpirtualiz\u00ebm t\u00eb pamish\u00ebruar ose n\u00eb nj\u00eb afrim antropologjik, psikologjik dhe kulturor, ku n\u00eb thelb nuk jan\u00eb t\u00eb pranishme vlerat e thirrjes s\u00eb krishter\u00eb.<\/p>\n

N\u00ebse sigurisht refuzohet nj\u00eb vizion i psikologjis\u00eb (e cila edhe ajo bazohet n\u00eb nj\u00eb stil antropologjik jo t\u00eb krishter\u00eb) duke ndjekur mir\u00ebqenien me nj\u00eb \u00e7mim t\u00eb lir\u00eb, megjith\u00ebse problemi i plot\u00ebsimit mes p\u00ebrb\u00ebr\u00ebsve t\u00eb ndrysh\u00ebm t\u00eb personit njer\u00ebzor mbetet i hapur dhe nuk mund t\u00eb mos ndiqet. Rruga mbetet gjithmon\u00eb ajo e dialogut dhe e nj\u00eb mendimi sipas kompleksitetit, me t\u00eb gjitha rreziqet dhe v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsit\u00eb q\u00eb ky do t\u00eb mund t\u00eb sillte.<\/p>\n

Ekstremizmi, qoft\u00eb ai shpirt\u00ebror apo psikologjik, mundet, pra, t\u00eb \u00e7oj\u00eb n\u00eb t\u00eb nj\u00ebjtat rezultate shkat\u00ebrrimtare, p\u00ebr faktin se \u00e7do r\u00ebndim bart n\u00eb vetvete shenjat karakteristike t\u00eb dia-b\u00f2los, t\u00eb ndar\u00ebsit: n\u00eb fillim mund t\u00eb duket nj\u00eb shkurtim i rehatsh\u00ebm p\u00ebrball\u00eb problemeve, nj\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb e t\u00eb jetuarit t\u00eb qet\u00eb duke iu shmangur v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsive, por her\u00ebt a von\u00eb ata \u00abi paraqesin hesapet\u00bb dhe shpesh b\u00ebhet fjal\u00eb p\u00ebr nj\u00eb llogari \u00abt\u00eb shtrenjt\u00eb\u00bb, q\u00eb duhet paguar, pra, duke mohuar at\u00eb krip\u00eb q\u00eb i jep shije jet\u00ebs (krhs. Mt. 5, 13). Ndarja e natyr\u00ebs nga hiri, e trupit nga shpirti, e arsyes nga ndjenjat, \u00ebsht\u00eb gjithmon\u00eb nj\u00eb mohim i mish\u00ebrimit.<\/p>\n

\u00c7far\u00eb do t\u00eb thot\u00eb t\u00eb jesh i pjekur?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Pjekuria e nj\u00eb personi mund t\u00eb karakterizohet e t\u00eb njihet n\u00eb dy drejtime themelore: a) si nj\u00eb liri themelore e brendshme, aft\u00ebsi hapjeje ndaj realitetit dhe marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieve; b) si d\u00ebshir\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u2019u rritur, p\u00ebr t\u2019u njohur gjithnj\u00eb e m\u00eb shum\u00eb nga pik\u00ebpamja intelektuale, shpirt\u00ebrore, sociale, afektive.<\/p>\n

Nga pik\u00ebpamja qoft\u00eb psikologjike qoft\u00eb shpirt\u00ebrore afektet shfaqen si nd\u00ebrlidhja m\u00eb e thell\u00eb e dimensioneve t\u00eb ndryshme t\u00eb subjektit, deri n\u00eb at\u00eb pik\u00eb q\u00eb afektiviteti i qenies njer\u00ebzore nuk mund t\u00eb konceptohet pa iu referuar dimensionit njoh\u00ebs dhe vendimor. Kjo nuk do t\u00eb thot\u00eb se ideali i formimit \u00ebsht\u00eb pa probleme dhe v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi; madje, ky iluzion do t\u00eb mund t\u00eb zbulohej shum\u00eb i rreziksh\u00ebm. B\u00ebhet fjal\u00eb t\u00eb njihen m\u00eb shum\u00eb zonat personale t\u00eb brisht\u00ebsis\u00eb dhe t\u00eb plot\u00ebsohen. Njeriu i pjekur nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb makin\u00eb, por nj\u00eb person i aft\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb nj\u00ebsoj\u00eb aft\u00ebsit\u00eb njoh\u00ebse, d\u00ebshiruese dhe afektive, duke mos i fshehur hapat q\u00eb ka p\u00ebr t\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb dhe v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsit\u00eb q\u00eb i duhet t\u00eb kaloj\u00eb.<\/p>\n

Ky paramet\u00ebr rezulton vendimtar edhe p\u00ebr t\u00eb njohur shtremb\u00ebrime t\u00eb mundshme ose prishje t\u00eb ekuilibrit dhe t\u2019i plot\u00ebsoj\u00eb: \u00ab\u00cbsht\u00eb afektivisht i pjekur ai q\u00eb ia ka dal\u00eb t\u00eb krijoj\u00eb nj\u00eb sintez\u00eb t\u00eb harmonishme qoft\u00eb mes p\u00ebrb\u00ebr\u00ebsve t\u00eb ndrysh\u00ebm t\u00eb jet\u00ebs emotive (n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb ve\u00e7ant\u00eb t\u00eb seksualitetit dhe agresivitetit), qoft\u00eb mes emotivitetit dhe arsyes. Njeriu i pjekur mund t\u2019i p\u00ebrdor\u00eb impulset q\u00eb vijn\u00eb nga seksualiteti dhe agresiviteti p\u00ebr t\u00eb mir\u00ebn e p\u00ebrgjithshme t\u00eb personit, n\u00eb vend q\u00eb t\u2019i shp\u00ebrndaj\u00eb n\u00eb k\u00ebrkim t\u00eb k\u00ebnaq\u00ebsis\u00eb s\u00eb menj\u00ebhershme. Ai g\u00ebzon nj\u00eb kufi t\u00eb duksh\u00ebm lirie t\u00eb brendshme dhe \u00ebsht\u00eb i aft\u00eb t\u00eb doj\u00eb n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb nd\u00ebrtuese, duke pajtuar dhe plot\u00ebsuar n\u00eb nivel shpirt\u00ebror dashurin\u00eb biologjike (ose mish\u00ebrore) dhe at\u00eb psikologjike (ose erotike). Hetimet psiko-sociologjike dhe p\u00ebrvoja klinike zbulojn\u00eb se elemente papjekurie psiko-afektive takohen n\u00eb t\u00eb gjith\u00eb njer\u00ebzit […]. Q\u00eb t\u00eb jemi realist\u00eb, angazhimi n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb fush\u00eb nuk q\u00ebndron n\u00eb d\u00ebshir\u00ebn p\u00ebr t\u00eb eliminuar t\u00eb gjitha mbetjet e f\u00ebmij\u00ebris\u00eb (gj\u00eb q\u00eb do t\u00eb ishte utopistike), por duke u nd\u00ebrgjegj\u00ebsuar, duke i pranuar emotivisht si di\u00e7ka e jona e duke u p\u00ebrpjekur p\u00ebr t\u2019i integruar n\u00eb kontekstin e personalitetit ton\u00eb\u00bb4<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb e nevojshme t\u00eb sillen shum\u00eb justifikime rreth r\u00ebnd\u00ebsis\u00eb s\u00eb nj\u00eb edukimi afektiv n\u00eb formimin e n\u00eb jet\u00ebn shpirt\u00ebrore n\u00eb p\u00ebrgjith\u00ebsi. P\u00ebr ta v\u00ebn\u00eb re k\u00ebt\u00eb, do t\u00eb mjaftonte t\u00eb hapej libri i Psalmeve p\u00ebr t\u00eb gjetur t\u00eb p\u00ebrshkruar marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnien mes atij q\u00eb lutet dhe Zotit t\u00eb vet thelb\u00ebsisht me fjal\u00eb afektive. Afektet jan\u00eb ata q\u00eb p\u00ebrb\u00ebjn\u00eb modalitetet e ndryshme t\u00eb lutjes: lavdi dhe fal\u00ebnderimi, p\u00ebrgj\u00ebrimi, ankese, lart\u00ebsimi… Jo vet\u00ebm \u00e7do ndjenj\u00eb gjen vend n\u00eb psalter, por ai i jep tonin lutjes dhe shpesh ndjenjat e atij q\u00eb lutet ndryshojn\u00eb dhe shnd\u00ebrrohen gjat\u00eb Psalmit, duke kaluar nga e qara n\u00eb fal\u00ebnderim, nga kremtimi n\u00eb k\u00ebrkes\u00eb.<\/p>\n

Papa Gjon Pali II ka disa fjal\u00eb dometh\u00ebn\u00ebse lidhur me dimensionin njer\u00ebzor dhe afektiv t\u00eb misterit t\u00eb sh\u00eblbimit: \u00abNjeriu nuk mund t\u00eb jetoj\u00eb pa dashuri. Ai mbetet n\u00eb vetvete nj\u00eb qenie e pakuptueshme, jeta e tij \u00ebsht\u00eb pa kuptim, n\u00ebse nuk i zbulohet dashuria, n\u00ebse nuk takohet me dashurin\u00eb, n\u00ebse nuk e p\u00ebrjeton dhe nuk e b\u00ebn t\u00eb veten, n\u00ebse nuk merr pjes\u00eb n\u00eb t\u00eb n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb gjall\u00eb\u00bb5<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

T\u00eb njihet n\u00eb thirrjen e Hyjit kuptimi dhe dometh\u00ebnia e k\u00ebsaj gjendje jete do t\u00eb thot\u00eb: a) nj\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie intimiteti i ve\u00e7ant\u00eb me Zotin, megjith\u00ebse e mistershme dhe kurr\u00eb krejt\u00ebsisht e kuptueshme nga pik\u00ebpamja thjesht njer\u00ebzore; b) nj\u00eb hir i marr\u00eb q\u00eb duhet kultivuar dhe thelluar vazhdimisht.<\/p>\n

Ky polaritet i dyfisht\u00eb, shfaqet afektivisht n\u00eb t\u00eb qen\u00ebt \u00abi ri\u00bb shpirt\u00ebrisht, si aft\u00ebsi p\u00ebr t\u2019u entuziazmuar, p\u00ebr t\u2019u habitur p\u00ebr \u00e7ka \u00ebsht\u00eb e bukur, p\u00ebr t\u2019u ndezur, p\u00ebr t\u00eb pasur d\u00ebshira t\u00eb m\u00ebdha e p\u00ebr t\u00eb qen\u00eb t\u00eb gatsh\u00ebm t\u00eb vihet n\u00eb loj\u00eb vetvetja. Kjo aft\u00ebsi p\u00ebr t\u00eb komunikuar jet\u00eb e g\u00ebzim, fryt i Shpirtit (krhs. Gal. 5, 22), zgjat dhe rritet me kalimin e koh\u00ebs.<\/p>\n

Por, kriteri vendimtar, q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb edhe m\u00eb i v\u00ebshtir\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u2019u jetuar, \u00ebsht\u00eb aft\u00ebsia p\u00ebr t\u00eb dashur e p\u00ebr t\u00eb q\u00ebndruar n\u00eb dashuri, duke p\u00ebrballuar sfidat q\u00eb na vihen nga zgjedhja e nd\u00ebrmarr\u00eb, duke llogaritur zhg\u00ebnjime, konflikte dhe v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi6<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

P\u00ebr t\u00eb shprehur afektin n\u00eb kuptimin e nj\u00eb dhurimi t\u00eb vetvetes, subjekti duhet t\u00eb jet\u00eb i aft\u00eb t\u00eb zot\u00ebroj\u00eb emocionet e tij dhe nevojat e tij: ata jan\u00eb gjithmon\u00eb t\u00eb pranishme, por nuk p\u00ebrb\u00ebjn\u00eb shkakun e nevojsh\u00ebm dhe t\u00eb vet\u00ebm t\u00eb t\u00eb vepruarit.<\/p>\n

Udh\u00ebzime specifike p\u00ebr pranimin dhe formimin n\u00eb seminar<\/strong><\/p>\n

Formimi fetar jo gjithmon\u00eb ka qen\u00eb i fort\u00eb. Nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb vet\u00ebm kronika e k\u00ebtyre viteve q\u00eb na e thot\u00eb lidhur me abuzimet q\u00eb kan\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb meshtar\u00ebt. Shum\u00eb t\u00eb rinj nuk vijn\u00eb m\u00eb nga ambiente n\u00eb t\u00eb cilat jetohet nj\u00eb fe dhe nj\u00eb jet\u00eb sakramentore, si\u00e7 ishte zakon n\u00eb ambiente katolike rreth 25 vite m\u00eb par\u00eb.<\/p>\n

Rezulton, pra, i nevojsh\u00ebm nj\u00eb shoq\u00ebrim cil\u00ebsor gjat\u00eb formimit, por edhe nj\u00eb seleksionim i qart\u00eb dhe k\u00ebrkues p\u00ebrball\u00eb atij q\u00eb vendos t\u00eb hyj\u00eb n\u00eb seminar ose n\u00eb jet\u00ebn e p\u00ebrkushtuar.<\/p>\n

Meshtar\u00eb dhe rregulltar\u00eb duhet t\u00eb formohen n\u00eb harmoni me vlerat dhe idealet e Kish\u00ebs, duke pasur parasysh tensionin mes asaj q\u00eb d\u00ebshirohet dhe asaj q\u00eb realisht realizohet dhe jetohet. Bota e sotme, s\u00eb bashku me nj\u00eb pasuri t\u00eb madhe t\u00eb mirash dhe mund\u00ebsish p\u00ebr jet\u00ebn rregulltare, paraqet me t\u00eb nj\u00ebjtin boll\u00ebk pyetje t\u00eb r\u00ebnda, v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi, kund\u00ebrshtime dhe sfida. P\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb, formimi i meshtar\u00ebve, rregulltar\u00eb dhe bashk\u00ebpun\u00ebtor\u00eb n\u00eb baritore, ka nevoj\u00eb p\u00ebr m\u00eb shum\u00eb koh\u00eb dhe m\u00eb shum\u00eb njohje. T\u00eb pretendohet q\u00eb sakramenti i Urdhrit Shenjt dhe shpallja e kushteve rregulltare i zgjidhin n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb magjike v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsit\u00eb, nuk ndihmon sigurisht. Vet\u00eb Tereza e Avil\u00ebs donte p\u00ebr udh\u00ebheq\u00ebs shpirt\u00ebror\u00eb persona t\u00eb zgjuar dhe t\u00eb p\u00ebrgatitur e jo vet\u00ebm t\u00eb p\u00ebrshpirtsh\u00ebm.<\/p>\n

N\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb screening, duke pasur parasysh nj\u00eb kontribut t\u00eb von\u00eb t\u00eb Andreas Tapken, mund t\u00eb dallohen gjasht\u00eb zona t\u00eb privilegjuara7<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

1. T\u00eb k\u00ebrkohet Hyji<\/strong><\/p>\n

Ky \u00ebsht\u00eb motivimi q\u00eb do t\u00eb duhej t\u00eb rezultonte si kryesori. Nganj\u00ebher\u00eb, p\u00ebr fat t\u00eb keq, nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb, por kryesojn\u00eb arsye t\u00eb tjera, si p\u00ebr shembull nj\u00eb rol p\u00ebr t\u2019u marr\u00eb, nj\u00eb aktivitet p\u00ebr t\u2019u zhvilluar, madje edhe nj\u00eb zell i past\u00ebr dhe i senqert\u00eb p\u00ebr drejt\u00ebsin\u00eb shoq\u00ebrore, por jo nj\u00eb p\u00ebrvoj\u00eb autentike e Hyjit, ndjenja dhe shija e s\u00eb shenjtes dhe e jet\u00ebs shpirt\u00ebrore. N\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb, elemente objektivisht dyt\u00ebsore rrezikojn\u00eb t\u00eb b\u00ebhen elemente q\u00eb kan\u00eb pesh\u00eb n\u00eb k\u00ebrkes\u00ebn p\u00ebr t\u2019u b\u00ebr\u00eb meshtar\u00eb. Prej k\u00ebtu lindin disa pyetje themelore q\u00eb karakterizojn\u00eb verifikimin e ecjes, t\u00eb pakt\u00ebn n\u00eb etap\u00ebn e saj t\u00eb par\u00eb: \u00abA ekziston nj\u00eb p\u00ebrvoj\u00eb autentike, nj\u00eb d\u00ebshir\u00eb apo t\u00eb pakt\u00ebn nj\u00eb intuit\u00eb e Hyjit? Dhe kjo a i arrin thell\u00ebsit\u00eb e ekzistenc\u00ebs dhe t\u00eb personalitetit t\u00eb kandidatit? Me k\u00ebt\u00eb q\u00ebllim \u00ebsht\u00eb e dobishme t\u00eb b\u00ebhen q\u00eb t\u00eb tregojn\u00eb ndonj\u00eb gj\u00eb prej p\u00ebrvojave shpirt\u00ebrore t\u00eb b\u00ebra e t\u00eb ndjenjave q\u00eb jan\u00eb t\u00eb lidhura me to\u00bb8<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Prej k\u00ebtu vjen edhe r\u00ebnd\u00ebsia e nj\u00eb p\u00ebrshpirt\u00ebrie afektive, e aft\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb p\u00ebrfshir\u00eb afektet, mendjen dhe imagjinimin; ajo \u00ebsht\u00eb tipike e atij q\u00eb ka b\u00ebr\u00eb nj\u00eb p\u00ebrvoj\u00eb t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb me Hyjin dhe di t\u00eb gjej\u00eb n\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie me T\u00eb arsyen e t\u00eb qenurit t\u00eb jet\u00ebs s\u00eb vet9<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Kardinali Hume u jepte k\u00ebt\u00eb k\u00ebshill\u00eb atyre q\u00eb p\u00ebrgatiteshin p\u00ebr t\u2019u b\u00ebr\u00eb prezbiter\u00eb: \u00abE vetmja m\u00ebnyr\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb jetuar si beqar \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb jet\u00eb e disiplinuar me lutje. Besoj se kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb ajo q\u00eb na shp\u00ebton n\u00eb fund. Duhet ta mbush\u00ebsh mendjen t\u00ebnde dhe zemr\u00ebn t\u00ebnde me nj\u00eb d\u00ebshir\u00eb t\u00eb madhe dhe nj\u00eb aspirat\u00eb t\u00eb madhe p\u00ebr Hyjin dhe p\u00ebr gj\u00ebrat e Hyjit. Nuk do t\u00eb mundesh ta b\u00ebsh gjithmon\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb n\u00eb nivelin m\u00eb t\u00eb lart\u00eb, por do t\u00eb duhej t\u00eb ishte ajo drejt s\u00eb cil\u00ebs priresh gjithmon\u00eb\u00bb10<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

P\u00ebrfytyrimi i Hyjit e shnd\u00ebrron jet\u00ebn kur p\u00ebrfshin ndjenja dhe afekte, duke hyr\u00eb n\u00eb rrjet\u00ebn e thell\u00eb t\u00eb personit. Dhe Fjala e Hyjit, duke qen\u00eb mbi t\u00eb gjitha tregim, poezi, simbol, shkon p\u00ebr t\u00eb prekur dimensionet themelore t\u00eb ekzistenc\u00ebs. N\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb, Bibla, i flet jet\u00ebs s\u00eb atij q\u00eb lutet: \u00abBibla nuk p\u00ebrmban traktate teologjie. Momentet e m\u00ebdha t\u00eb Zbules\u00ebs jan\u00eb transmetuar n\u00eb form\u00eb treguese. Kjo ka r\u00ebnd\u00ebsin\u00eb e vet. N\u00eb fakt, nj\u00eb prej elementave thelb\u00ebsor\u00eb t\u00eb gjinis\u00eb treguese \u00ebsht\u00eb dimensioni i saj kohor. Vijimi i elementave n\u00eb nj\u00eb tregim \u00ebsht\u00eb i lidhur me nj\u00eb kronologji, jo me nj\u00eb deduksion logjik si n\u00eb nj\u00eb traktat filozofik ose teologjik […]. E v\u00ebrteta q\u00eb Bibla paraqet nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb vet\u00ebm nj\u00eb pjes\u00eb e s\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00ebs mbi jet\u00ebn apo mbi fatin njer\u00ebzor, por nj\u00eb zgjedhje q\u00eb angazhon ekzistenc\u00ebn e lexuesit t\u00eb saj virtual\u00bb11<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Ky imazh ka gjetur n\u00eb Kish\u00ebn lut\u00ebse nj\u00eb tradit\u00eb t\u00eb pasur e t\u00eb gjall\u00eb, q\u00eb shprehet nga lectio divina, q\u00eb ushqehet gjat\u00eb shekujve me d\u00ebgjimin afektiv t\u00eb Fjal\u00ebs s\u00eb Hyjit, me freski t\u00eb pandryshueshme. Nj\u00eb propozim lutjeje i till\u00eb lind nga konsiderimi i ecjes s\u00eb dy historive n\u00eb zanafill\u00ebn e takimit mes Hyjit dhe njeriut: \u00abFjala e Hyjit nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb lib\u00ebr, nj\u00eb koleksion shkrimesh, \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb far\u00eb, di\u00e7ka q\u00eb e mban jet\u00ebn n\u00eb vetvete dhe q\u00eb zhvillon k\u00ebt\u00eb jet\u00eb deri sa t\u00eb krijoj\u00eb pem\u00ebn e madhe t\u00eb Mbret\u00ebris\u00eb. Bul\u00ebzon, pra, n\u00eb histori si nj\u00eb jet\u00ebn personale t\u00eb \u00e7do njeriu, rritet duke e mbushur realitetin me nj\u00eb prani t\u00eb re, shenjt\u00ebron sepse ushqen dhe u jep ushqim atyre q\u00eb e marrin, dhe ndri\u00e7on sepse zbulon sekretin e gj\u00ebrave duke iu dh\u00ebn\u00eb urti atyre e duke i ngritur n\u00eb plot\u00ebsimin e tyre t\u00eb fundit\u00bb12<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Frekuentimi i vazhduesh\u00ebm me k\u00ebt\u00eb fjal\u00eb shnd\u00ebrron m\u00ebnyr\u00ebn e t\u00eb menduarit, t\u00eb t\u00eb shikuarit, t\u00eb t\u00eb imagjinuarit t\u00eb lexuesit. Nj\u00eb aspekt rezulton n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb ve\u00e7ant\u00eb i r\u00ebnd\u00ebsish\u00ebm, vler\u00ebsimi n\u00eb rritje i heshtjes dhe, si rrjedhoj\u00eb, shenjt\u00ebria e vetmis\u00eb.<\/p>\n

2. Nj\u00eb identitet i q\u00ebndruesh\u00ebm <\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00cbsht\u00eb aft\u00ebsia p\u00ebr t\u00eb jetuar n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb nj\u00ebsuar dhe me vazhdim\u00ebsi larmin\u00eb e p\u00ebrvojave dhe t\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieve, q\u00eb kan\u00eb karakterizuar dhe karakterizojn\u00eb historin\u00eb e personit, duke kryer at\u00eb q\u00eb filozofi Ricoeur quan \u00abidentitet tregues\u00bb13<\/sup>. B\u00ebhet fjal\u00eb gjithashtu p\u00ebr nj\u00eb pik\u00eb vendimtare p\u00ebr t\u00eb ardhmen e meshtarit, sepse duke u nisur nga ai njihen parametrat themelore t\u00eb personalitetit, tipike t\u00eb bariut, si \u00abpjekuria afektive, aft\u00ebsia p\u00ebr t\u00eb udh\u00ebhequr nj\u00eb bashk\u00ebsi e p\u00ebr t\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb gjykime t\u00eb sh\u00ebndosha\u00bb14<\/sup>. Siguria rreth identitetit vetjak dhe orientimit seksual spostohet gjithnj\u00eb e m\u00eb p\u00ebrpara n\u00eb koh\u00eb; deri pak vite m\u00eb p\u00ebrpara ajo arrinte deri n\u00eb 18 ose 20 vje\u00e7, nd\u00ebrsa sot formohet shpesh p\u00ebrtej 20 viteve dhe nganj\u00ebher\u00eb nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb krejt e qart\u00eb. Gjith\u00eb kjo b\u00ebn pjes\u00eb n\u00eb problematik\u00ebn m\u00eb t\u00eb gjer\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb gjetur nj\u00eb identitet n\u00eb nj\u00eb shoq\u00ebri \u00abt\u00eb l\u00ebng\u00ebt\u00bb, p\u00ebr t\u00eb rimarr\u00eb p\u00ebrkufizimin e famsh\u00ebm t\u00eb Bauman-it, q\u00eb duket sikur i b\u00ebn nj\u00ebsoj t\u00eb p\u00ebrshkueshme t\u00eb gjitha mund\u00ebsit\u00eb, kudo e n\u00eb \u00e7do moment, edhe fal\u00eb iluzioneve virtuale t\u00eb Internetit15<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Dokumenti Nuove vocazioni per una nuova Europa16<\/sup> e fut thirrjen p\u00ebr beqari n\u00eb rrethin e pjekuris\u00eb afektive, duke treguar disa karakteristika themelore t\u00eb saj: \u00ab\u00cbsht\u00eb e r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme q\u00eb i riu t\u00eb mund t\u00eb tregoj\u00eb se mund t\u2019i fitoj\u00eb ata dy siguri q\u00eb e b\u00ebjn\u00eb personin t\u00eb lir\u00eb nga ana afektive, dometh\u00ebn\u00eb sigurin\u00eb q\u00eb vjen nga p\u00ebrvoja se \u00ebsht\u00eb tashm\u00eb i dashur dhe sigurin\u00eb, gjithnj\u00eb nga p\u00ebrvoja, se di t\u00eb duaj\u00eb. Konkretisht, i riu do t\u00eb duhej t\u00eb dinte t\u00eb tregoj\u00eb at\u00eb ekuilib\u00ebr njer\u00ebzor q\u00eb i lejon t\u00eb dij\u00eb t\u00eb q\u00ebndroj\u00eb n\u00eb k\u00ebmb\u00eb vet\u00ebm, do t\u00eb duhej t\u00eb zot\u00ebronte at\u00eb siguri dhe autonomi q\u00eb i leht\u00ebsojn\u00eb raportin social dhe miq\u00ebsin\u00eb e p\u00ebrzem\u00ebrt, dhe at\u00eb ndjenj\u00eb p\u00ebrgjegj\u00ebsie q\u00eb i lejon t\u00eb jetoj\u00eb si i rritur t\u00eb nj\u00ebjtin raport social, i lir\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb dh\u00ebn\u00eb e p\u00ebr t\u00eb marr\u00eb\u00bb17<\/sup>. Duke ndjekur dokumentin, mund t\u00eb sakt\u00ebsohen disa kritere vler\u00ebsimi lidhur me k\u00ebt\u00eb.<\/p>\n

Para s\u00eb gjithash \u00ebsht\u00eb e r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme t\u00eb kujtohet dallimi para kohe mes seksualitetit dhe afektivitetit; ata, megjith\u00ebse t\u00eb lidhur ngusht\u00eb mes tyre, nuk koin\u00e7idojn\u00eb. Seksualiteti, i kuptuar si organe gjinore, mund t\u00eb jet\u00eb manifestim i privilegjuar i p\u00ebrzem\u00ebrsis\u00eb, por jo domosdoshm\u00ebrisht. Seksualiteti mund edhe t\u00eb jetohet n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb krejt t\u00eb shk\u00ebputur nga afektet, si n\u00eb degjenerim, ku p\u00ebrpjekja \u00ebsht\u00eb q\u00eb tjetri t\u00eb p\u00ebrdoret si nj\u00eb objekt mbi t\u00eb cilin t\u00eb p\u00ebrq\u00ebndrohet agresiviteti dhe zhg\u00ebnjimi. Nga ana tjet\u00ebr afektiviteti mundet t\u00eb mos ket\u00eb shprehje seksuale, si\u00e7 \u00ebsht\u00eb rasti i jet\u00ebs s\u00eb p\u00ebrkushtuar dhe i beqaris\u00eb, e t\u00eb gjej\u00eb forma t\u00eb tjera shprehjeje: marr\u00ebdh\u00ebniet brenda jet\u00ebs s\u00eb bashk\u00ebsis\u00eb, sh\u00ebrbesat apostolike, miq\u00ebsit\u00eb, si\u00e7 mund t\u00eb shihet m\u00eb p\u00ebrpara.<\/p>\n

\u00cbsht\u00eb nj\u00eb vizion, q\u00eb gjen p\u00ebrforcim n\u00eb k\u00ebrkimin vetjak t\u00eb psikologjis\u00eb s\u00eb zhvillimit: \u00abP\u00ebrgjigja seksuale njer\u00ebzore mund t\u00eb vonohet n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb pap\u00ebrcaktuar ose t\u00eb mohuar nga ana funksionale gjat\u00eb gjith\u00eb jet\u00ebs. Asnj\u00eb pro\u00e7es tjet\u00ebr fiziologjik nuk mund t\u00eb reklamoj\u00eb nj\u00eb lakueshm\u00ebri t\u00eb till\u00eb t\u00eb shprehjes fizike […]. Edhe pse \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb funksion fiziologjik natyror, p\u00ebrgjigjja seksuale mund t\u00eb fisnik\u00ebrohet, t\u00eb p\u00ebrkufizohet, t\u00eb spostohet ose t\u00eb shtremb\u00ebrohet nga frenimi i p\u00ebrb\u00ebr\u00ebsve t\u00eb saj natyror\u00eb dhe\/ose tjet\u00ebrsimi i ambientit n\u00eb t\u00eb cilin veprojn\u00eb. P\u00ebr shembull: funksioni seksual konsiderohet nj\u00eb pro\u00e7es natyror, por, vullnetarisht i fisnik\u00ebruar nga arsye mjaft t\u00eb vlefshme, mund t\u2019u lejoj\u00eb nj\u00eb grad\u00eb t\u00eb lart\u00eb tolerance tensioneve seksuale me ndjes\u00eb e jo me shtremb\u00ebrim\u00bb18<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Ky moskoin\u00e7idim mes dy p\u00ebrb\u00ebr\u00ebsve \u00ebsht\u00eb e kuptueshme n\u00ebse njihet karakteri simbolik i seksualitetit dhe i afektivitetit, kujtimi i tyre strukturor me dometh\u00ebnie edhe t\u00eb fshehura dhe jo t\u00eb njohura haptas nga subjekti; ata, pra, jan\u00eb t\u00eb hapurndaj dometh\u00ebniesh dhe leximesh t\u00eb ndryshme. Kjo bised\u00eb sjell edhe q\u00eb disa v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi, n\u00eb dukje t\u00eb para, tipikisht seksuale, n\u00eb fakt reflektojn\u00eb problematika t\u00eb nj\u00eb tipi tjet\u00ebr, si dashurin\u00eb p\u00ebr vetveten, pjekurin\u00eb, aft\u00ebsin\u00eb e dhurimit dhe t\u00eb jetuarit e marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieve t\u00eb thella dhe t\u00eb q\u00ebndrueshme19<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

3. Aft\u00ebsia p\u00ebr t\u00eb dashur dhe p\u00ebr t\u00eb dhuruar vetveten <\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00cbsht\u00eb nj\u00ebra prej shprehjeve m\u00eb t\u00eb r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme t\u00eb pjekuris\u00eb afektive, aft\u00ebsia p\u00ebr t\u00eb njohur e p\u00ebr t\u00eb dashur t\u00eb mir\u00ebn e tjetrit, n\u00ebn shenj\u00ebn e empatis\u00eb. \u00cbsht\u00eb antiteza e nar\u00e7izizmit, e vet\u00ebmjaftueshm\u00ebris\u00eb dhe e vet\u00ebrealizimit si kriter suprem i jet\u00ebs, nj\u00eb propozim kulturor q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb e kund\u00ebrta e idealit t\u00eb njeriut ungjillor. \u00cbsht\u00eb ftesa p\u00ebr t\u00eb dal\u00eb nga nga vetvetja e p\u00ebr t\u00eb v\u00ebn\u00eb Hyjin n\u00eb qend\u00ebr t\u00eb ekzistenc\u00ebs vetjake, kund\u00ebr tundimit p\u00ebr ta b\u00ebr\u00eb un-in qend\u00ebr t\u00eb jet\u00ebs vetjake.<\/p>\n

At\u00eb Luigi Rulla, shpreh k\u00ebshtu dilem\u00ebn psikologjike q\u00eb vihet n\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie afektive mes vet\u00ebrealizimit dhe vet\u00ebtranshendenc\u00ebs, t\u00eb v\u00ebna p\u00ebrball\u00eb me vlerat e krishtera: \u00ab\u00cbsht\u00eb e qart\u00eb se motivimi baz\u00eb i thirrjes s\u00eb krishter\u00eb nuk mund t\u00eb jet\u00eb vet\u00ebrealizimi si q\u00ebllim n\u00eb vetvete; pas t\u00eb gjithave, kjo e fundit sjell nj\u00eb vizion antropologjik n\u00eb t\u00eb cilin njeriu \u00ebsht\u00eb i qend\u00ebrzuar mbi vetveten dhe, pra, i paaft\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb dashur dhe i paaft\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb marr\u00eb dashuri, i pamundur q\u00eb t\u00eb jetoj\u00eb nj\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie me tjetrin me q\u00ebllim q\u00eb t\u00eb arrij\u00eb vet\u00ebrealizimin […].<\/p>\n

Bukur e ndryshme \u00ebsht\u00eb antropologjia q\u00eb q\u00ebndron n\u00ebn vet\u00ebtranshendenc\u00ebn e agap\u0113-s\u00eb. K\u00ebtu, motivimi \u00ebsht\u00eb dhurimi i plot\u00eb i vetvetes p\u00ebr t\u00eb mir\u00ebn, p\u00ebr krejt t\u00eb mir\u00ebn e tjetrit; n\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnien me individin tjet\u00ebr del nga vetvetja gjersa t\u00eb harroj\u00eb vetveten; ai nuk k\u00ebrkon realizimin e aft\u00ebsive t\u00eb tija t\u00eb ve\u00e7anta apo t\u00eb mund\u00ebsive t\u00eb tija, por e pranon personin tjet\u00ebr pa rezerva, n\u00eb t\u00ebr\u00ebsin\u00eb e tij. E k\u00ebshtu mund t\u00eb realizoj\u00eb vetveten n\u00eb lirin\u00eb e tij t\u00eb vet\u00ebtranshendenc\u00ebs n\u00eb dashuri; por ky vet\u00ebrealizim \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb rrjedhoj\u00eb e vet\u00ebtranshendenc\u00ebs. Antropologjia e krishter\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb p\u00ebr personalizmin e Ti dhe ti, jo p\u00ebr at\u00eb t\u00eb \u201cun-it\u201d\u00bb20<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Disa udh\u00ebzime mund t\u00eb ndihmojn\u00eb t\u00eb konkretizojm\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb pik\u00eb themelore.<\/p>\n

– Cura affectum <\/strong><\/p>\n

Njohja e kufijve personal\u00eb hyn n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb ideal t\u00eb njohjes reale t\u00eb vetvetes. Mohimi q\u00eb meshtari dhe rregulltari kryejn\u00eb p\u00ebrball\u00eb martes\u00ebs nuk do t\u00eb thot\u00eb t\u00eb kryhet nj\u00eb jet\u00eb n\u00eb shenj\u00eb t\u00eb munges\u00ebs s\u00eb ndjenjave dhe t\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieve afektivisht dometh\u00ebn\u00ebse (n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb rast do t\u00eb kishin t\u00eb drejt\u00eb ata q\u00eb n\u00eb beqari shohin nj\u00eb situat\u00eb t\u00eb kund\u00ebrt me natyr\u00ebn e qenies njer\u00ebzore); ajo \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb tep\u00ebr rrjedhoj\u00eb e nj\u00eb thirrjeje t\u00eb dashuris\u00eb.<\/p>\n

N\u00eb forc\u00eb t\u00eb k\u00ebsaj thirrjeje mund t\u00eb thuhet se nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb beqaria n\u00eb vetvete ajo q\u00eb p\u00ebrb\u00ebn thelbin e jet\u00ebs rregulltare; ajo mbase \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb shenj\u00eb konkrete e p\u00ebrgjigjes me dashuri p\u00ebrball\u00eb Zotit q\u00eb na ka dashur i pari.<\/p>\n

Jo \u00e7do beqari \u00ebsht\u00eb dometh\u00ebn\u00ebse p\u00ebr jet\u00ebn e krishter\u00eb: fakti q\u00eb dikush nuk martohet nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb n\u00eb vetvete shenj\u00eb e nj\u00eb jete fetare: \u00abBeqaria […] nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb e nj\u00ebjta gj\u00eb me virtytin e virgj\u00ebris\u00eb. \u00cbsht\u00eb vet\u00ebm nj\u00eb mohim i martes\u00ebs dhe mund t\u00eb ket\u00eb arsye t\u00eb ndryshme. K\u00ebshtu, p\u00ebr shembull, e mohojn\u00eb martes\u00ebn disa persona q\u00eb duan t\u2019i kushtohen k\u00ebrkimit shkencor ose nj\u00eb pune tjet\u00ebr krijuese, ose aktivitetit social, etj., dhe e mohojn\u00eb n\u00eb t\u00eb nj\u00ebjt\u00ebn m\u00ebnyr\u00eb edhe disa persona t\u00eb s\u00ebmur\u00eb, t\u00eb pap\u00ebrshtatsh\u00ebm p\u00ebr martes\u00eb […]. Pa dyshim, mohimi i martes\u00ebs \u00ebsht\u00eb vet\u00ebm nj\u00eb zgjidhje negative. Njeriu provon nevoj\u00ebn p\u00ebr dashuri dhe k\u00ebrkon personin t\u00eb cilit t\u00eb mund t\u2019i dhurohet. Por fakti thjesht negativ q\u00eb nuk e ka gjetur, mund t\u00eb interpretohet si nj\u00eb udh\u00ebzim; mbetet mund\u00ebsia p\u00ebr t\u2019iu dhuruar Hyjit. Lind at\u00ebher\u00eb nj\u00eb v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi e natyr\u00ebs psikologjike, q\u00eb nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb bosh p\u00ebr nga r\u00ebnd\u00ebsia: \u201cA mund t\u2019i dhurohet Hyjit ajo q\u00eb nuk ka qen\u00eb e mundur t\u2019i dhurohet Hyjit?\u201d\u00bb21<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

T\u00eb ripohohet vlera e afektivitetit n\u00eb jet\u00ebn rregulltare do t\u00eb thot\u00eb t\u00eb shkohet tek burimet e thirrjes personale, q\u00eb nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb thjesht nj\u00eb mohim i martes\u00ebs, por nj\u00eb dhurat\u00eb: \u00abNuk mbetemi t\u00eb virgj\u00ebr p\u00ebr t\u00eb shp\u00ebtuar m\u00eb mir\u00eb shpirtin, por sepse Mbret\u00ebria, ose m\u00eb mir\u00eb Zoti, t\u00eb ka zot\u00ebruar, t\u00eb ka zgjedhur dhe ti ndien nevoj\u00ebn t\u00eb q\u00ebndrsoh i lir\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u2019iu p\u00ebrgjigjur plot\u00ebsiht k\u00ebsaj zgjedhjeje\u00bb22<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Mungesa e ndjenjave \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb e dh\u00ebn\u00eb shum\u00eb shqet\u00ebsuese n\u00eb dinamik\u00ebn formative dhe \u00ebsht\u00eb edhe nj\u00eb nga \u00abflamujt e kuq\u00bb t\u00eb n\u00ebnvizuara n\u00eb personalitetet e abuzuesve t\u00eb t\u00eb vegj\u00eblve, si\u00e7 \u00ebsht\u00eb par\u00eb. Megjith\u00ebse nuk arrihet n\u00eb k\u00ebto teprime mbetet sidoqoft\u00eb nj\u00eb shenj\u00eb shqet\u00ebsuese, sepse zbulon munges\u00ebn e g\u00ebzimit, karakteristik\u00eb e atij q\u00eb ka gjetur thesarin n\u00eb fush\u00eb ose perl\u00ebn e \u00e7muar (krhs. Mt. 13, 44 \u2013 46). N\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb rast \u00ebsht\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u2019u pyetur se \u00e7far\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb duke k\u00ebrkuar me t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb personi, dhe kurdo q\u00eb t\u00eb ket\u00eb zgjedhur, \u00e7far\u00eb imazh jete me Zotin komunikon: \u00abDuhet t\u00eb kihet shum\u00eb kujdes ndaj nj\u00ebzetvje\u00e7ar\u00ebve tashm\u00eb \u201ct\u00eb vjet\u00ebr\u201d dhe t\u00eb shfryr\u00eb, pa probleme sepse nuk kan\u00eb ideale t\u00eb m\u00ebdha dhe me zem\u00ebr tashm\u00eb n\u00eb pension; ose p\u00ebr disa thirrje t\u00eb rritura (jo krejt\u00ebsisht \u201crinore\u201d, si\u00e7 thuhet sot) q\u00eb lidhur me k\u00ebt\u00eb fush\u00eb din\u00eb gjith\u00e7ka e mendojn\u00eb se nuk kan\u00eb nevoj\u00eb p\u00ebr ndihm\u00eb (e nganj\u00ebher\u00eb improvizohen si udh\u00ebheq\u00ebs shpirt\u00ebror\u00eb t\u00eb m\u00eb t\u00eb rinjve \u201ct\u00eb pap\u00ebrvoj\u00eb\u201d).<\/p>\n

Kujdes ndaj atyre q\u00eb jan\u00eb shum\u00eb t\u00eb past\u00ebr dhe shum\u00eb serioz\u00eb, ndaj atij q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb i ashp\u00ebr dhe i ftoht\u00eb, por edhe ndaj atij q\u00eb tashm\u00eb ka zgjidhur \u00e7do problem dhe nuk ka asnj\u00eb v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi e beson se mund t\u00eb lexoj\u00eb gjith\u00e7ka, t\u00eb ndiej\u00eb gjith\u00e7ka, t\u00eb shoh\u00eb gjith\u00e7ka […]. Nganj\u00ebher\u00eb jan\u00eb tipat m\u00eb pak t\u00eb besuesh\u00ebm! Mendjemadh\u00ebsia \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb tregues tjet\u00ebr prognostik tejet i keq\u00bb23<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Kur afektet p\u00ebrjashtohen nga ecja formuese, rrezikohet t\u00eb vler\u00ebsohet meshtaria si nj\u00ebfar\u00eb \u00abprofesioni\u00bb, si nj\u00eb ushtrim fuqie e njohur n\u00eb nivel social. N\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb prespektiv\u00eb roli b\u00ebhet motivimi qendror, me kuptimin se individi gjen n\u00eb t\u00eb, p\u00ebrve\u00e7 t\u00eb mirash t\u00eb mundshme, nj\u00eb p\u00ebrgjigje thelb\u00ebsore p\u00ebr vler\u00ebsimin e vetvetes, p\u00ebr mbrojtjen nga frikat e pasigurit\u00eb, k\u00ebshtu q\u00eb motivime t\u00eb tjera ia dalin t\u00eb b\u00ebhen krejt\u00ebsisht dyt\u00ebsore derisa b\u00ebhen t\u00eb pakonsiderueshme.<\/p>\n

N\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb p\u00ebrfundohet psikologjikisht n\u00eb \u00abidentifikim me rolin\u00bb q\u00eb zhvillohet, n\u00eb d\u00ebm t\u00eb vlerave p\u00ebr t\u00eb cilat roli do t\u00eb duhej t\u00eb ishte modalitet shprehjeje24<\/sup>. P\u00ebr arsye t\u00eb k\u00ebsaj, personi do t\u00eb jet\u00eb i shqet\u00ebsuar jo q\u00eb t\u00eb jet\u00eb koherent ndaj vlerave p\u00ebrkat\u00ebse t\u00eb zgjedhjes q\u00eb ka b\u00ebr\u00eb, por t\u00eb shp\u00ebrblimeve t\u00eb mundshme q\u00eb do t\u00eb mund t\u00eb merrte, prej t\u00eb cilave \u00ebsht\u00eb gjithnj\u00eb i varur, derisa nuk ia arrin t\u00eb shoh\u00eb se disa gjeste dhe veprime bien n\u00eb kund\u00ebrshtim n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb marramend\u00ebse me thirrjen p\u00ebrkat\u00ebse. E k\u00ebshtu, nj\u00eb praktike t\u00eb \u201cpamjes s\u00eb jashtme\u201d, q\u00eb ndihet me qart\u00ebsi nga ata me t\u00eb cil\u00ebt hyn n\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie, nuk i korrispondon nj\u00eb p\u00ebrputhje me mendje e me zem\u00ebr, duke d\u00ebrguar nj\u00eb mesazh t\u00eb shenj\u00ebs s\u00eb kund\u00ebrt. N\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb rast, n\u00eb fakt, \u00abindividi varet nga faktor\u00eb t\u00eb jasht\u00ebm: marrja e nj\u00eb shp\u00ebrblimi ose shmangia nga nj\u00eb d\u00ebnim ose mbajtja e nj\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieje q\u00eb jep k\u00ebnaq\u00ebsi me nj\u00eb person apo me nj\u00eb grup\u00bb25<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Humbet n\u00eb nj\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb till\u00eb edhe detyra tipike e ligjit dhe e norm\u00ebs, e t\u00eb t\u00eb qenurit, si\u00e7 do ta thoshte sh\u00ebn Agustini, rojtarja e dashuris\u00eb, \u00abena\u00bb e nj\u00eb parfumi q\u00eb lejon t\u00eb ruhet aroma e tij n\u00eb koh\u00eb dhe t\u00eb siguroj\u00eb nj\u00eb vazhdim\u00ebsi. Pa t\u00eb, edhe parfumi m\u00eb i mir\u00eb dhe m\u00eb i shtrenjt\u00eb do t\u00eb zhdukej mjaft shpejt.<\/p>\n

P\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb, n\u00eb nivel formues, i vihet nj\u00eb v\u00ebmendje e ve\u00e7ant\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00ebs se si personi flet p\u00ebr vetveten dhe p\u00ebr historin\u00eb e jet\u00ebs s\u00eb vet, ku kryesisht ka kryer p\u00ebrvoja p\u00ebr t\u00eb cilat ndihet i shp\u00ebrblyer. N\u00eb prespektiv\u00eb biblike kjo e ndihmon personin t\u00eb p\u00ebrjetoj\u00eb ndjenj\u00ebn e var\u00ebsis\u00eb, q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb ndjenja e t\u00eb qenurit krijes\u00eb, t\u00eb rr\u00ebnj\u00ebsimit n\u00eb nj\u00eb kontekst historik, kulturor dhe n\u00eb nj\u00eb bashk\u00ebsi q\u00eb lejon t\u00eb jetohet.
\nAft\u00ebsia themelore p\u00ebr t\u00eb njohur dob\u00ebsit\u00eb p\u00ebrkat\u00ebse, n\u00eb t\u00eb kund\u00ebrt t\u00eb mendjemadh\u00ebsis\u00eb s\u00eb farizeut q\u00eb Ungjilli e denoncon (krhs. Lk. 18, 8-14), \u00ebsht\u00eb n\u00eb fund t\u00eb fundit vet\u00ebdija e t\u00eb qenurit m\u00ebkatar\u00eb nevojtar\u00eb p\u00ebr shp\u00ebtim, dhe gatishm\u00ebria p\u00ebr t\u00eb punuar mbi vetveten, q\u00eb terreni t\u00eb sjell\u00eb m\u00eb shum\u00eb fryt.<\/p>\n

N\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb kuptim nj\u00eb element dometh\u00ebn\u00ebs pjekurie jepet nga ndjenja e humorizmit<\/em>26<\/sup>, jo rast\u00ebsisht gj\u00eb q\u00eb mungon n\u00eb at\u00eb q\u00eb, si farizeu i sh\u00ebmb\u00eblltyr\u00ebs, beson se \u00ebsht\u00eb qendra e bot\u00ebs. Nsjenja e humorizmit n\u00eb nivel shpirt\u00ebror, b\u00ebhet n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb edhe nj\u00eb ftes\u00eb pendese, duke u ruajtur para s\u00eb gjithash edhe nga rreziku gjithmon\u00eb tragjik, p\u00ebr t\u2019u konsideruar t\u00eb domosdosh\u00ebm dhe tep\u00ebr t\u00eb r\u00ebnd\u00ebsish\u00ebm q\u00eb t\u00eb mund t\u00eb buz\u00ebqeshim p\u00ebr \u00e7ka na ndodh n\u00eb jet\u00eb. T\u00eb p\u00ebrballosh realitetin me humoriz\u00ebm nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb injoruar problemet dhe v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsit\u00eb, por do t\u00eb thot\u00eb t\u00eb m\u00ebsosh p\u00ebr t\u2019i \u00e7dramatizuar, dhe ky \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb kusht thelb\u00ebsor p\u00ebr t\u2019i p\u00ebrballuar dhe p\u00ebr t\u2019i tejkaluar.<\/p>\n

– Vlera fomuese e mohimit<\/strong><\/p>\n

Nj\u00eb karakteristik\u00eb tjet\u00ebr e r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme lidhur me k\u00ebt\u00eb, \u00ebsht\u00eb aft\u00ebsia p\u00ebr t\u00eb jetuar mohimin<\/em>27<\/sup>. Mohimi tregon se si nj\u00eb subjekt ka mund\u00ebsi t\u00eb jet\u00eb i q\u00ebndruesh\u00ebm n\u00eb nj\u00eb zgjedhje megjith\u00ebse nuk i ka marr\u00eb shp\u00ebrblimet (k\u00ebnaq\u00ebsit\u00eb) e pritura, duke arritur madje t\u00eb mos i pres\u00eb me vet\u00ebdije. Kjo mund t\u00eb ndodh\u00eb sepse motivimi afektiv i personit nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb i lidhur vet\u00ebm me p\u00eblqimin dhe k\u00ebnaqjen e menj\u00ebhershme; ajo m\u00eb shum\u00eb di t\u00eb shoh\u00eb p\u00ebrtej, drejt nj\u00eb t\u00eb mire dhe nj\u00eb vlere m\u00eb t\u00eb madhe. T\u00eb jetohet mohimi sjell edhe aft\u00ebsin\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb q\u00ebndruar n\u00eb nj\u00eb situat\u00eb tensioni pa i l\u00ebn\u00eb mang\u00ebsi me k\u00ebt\u00eb zgjedhjes s\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb.<\/p>\n

Nj\u00eb ndihm\u00eb e m\u00ebtejshme p\u00ebr t\u00eb kapur vler\u00ebn e mohimit mund t\u00eb arrij\u00eb nga dallimi themelor mes tensionit t\u00eb mohimit dhe tensionit t\u00eb zhg\u00ebnjimit<\/em>28<\/sup>. N\u00eb rastin e par\u00eb mohimi nuk vler\u00ebsohet si element qendror i motivimit, nuk shqet\u00ebson personin, nuk ia heq paqen dhe kthjellt\u00ebsin\u00eb, sepse nuk vihet re si di\u00e7ka e domosdoshme dhe e nevojshme p\u00ebr jet\u00ebn personale: po t\u00eb ishte k\u00ebshtu, tensioni do t\u00eb ishte vet\u00ebm zhg\u00ebnjim dhe do ta b\u00ebnte jet\u00ebn e p\u00ebrkushtuar praktikisht t\u00eb pamundur ose burim obsesionesh t\u00eb tilla sa p\u00ebr t\u00eb mos qen\u00eb kurr\u00eb t\u00eb k\u00ebnaqur p\u00ebr zgjedhjen e b\u00ebr\u00eb29<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Dallimi mes dy tipeve t\u00eb mohimit q\u00ebndron n\u00eb aft\u00ebsin\u00eb e vet\u00ebzot\u00ebrimit, dometh\u00ebn\u00eb, n\u00eb mund\u00ebsin\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb jetuar me liri dhe vet\u00ebdije origjin\u00ebn e tensionit, q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb aspekt tipik i luft\u00ebs shpirt\u00ebrore q\u00eb karakterizon jet\u00ebn e krishter\u00eb. Personi i pjekur nuk e humb paqen p\u00ebrball\u00eb tensionit, dhe \u00ebsht\u00eb i aft\u00eb t\u00eb q\u00ebndroj\u00eb n\u00eb at\u00eb situat\u00eb, duke treguar n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb nj\u00eb liri themelore q\u00eb nuk humbet n\u00eb v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi e n\u00eb konflikte t\u00eb mundshme, si mungesa e aprovimit t\u00eb t\u00eb tjer\u00ebve, kritika si rrjedhoj\u00eb e nj\u00eb sjelljeje p\u00ebr nj\u00eb q\u00ebndrim t\u00eb aktualizuar n\u00eb koherenc\u00eb me zgjedhjen personale t\u00eb jet\u00ebs.<\/p>\n

Nj\u00eb karakteristik\u00eb tjet\u00ebr q\u00eb ndihmon t\u00eb dallohet tensioni i mohimit nga tensioni i zhg\u00ebnjimit \u00ebsht\u00eb q\u00eb nj\u00eb dob\u00ebsi e till\u00eb t\u00eb ndihet haptas si e till\u00eb e t\u00eb mos ket\u00eb nevoj\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb mohohet ose t\u00eb mbulohet nga justifikime t\u00eb ndryshme. Lidhur me k\u00ebt\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb e r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme q\u00eb personi ta jetoj\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb situat\u00eb n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00ebn q\u00eb psikologjia e p\u00ebrkufizon \u00abego-distonike\u00bb30<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

– Dhurimi i vetvetes, baz\u00eb e thirrjes s\u00eb krishter\u00eb<\/strong><\/p>\n

Q\u00eb past\u00ebrtia q\u00ebndron n\u00eb aft\u00ebsin\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb jetuar afektivitetin si dhurat\u00eb, n\u00eb baz\u00eb t\u00eb \u00e7do thirrje t\u00eb mundshme, mund t\u00eb gjej\u00eb p\u00ebrforcim n\u00eb faktin se humbja e k\u00ebsaj hap\u00ebsire t\u00eb shenjt\u00eb e v\u00eb barabar n\u00eb kriz\u00eb beqarin\u00eb si martes\u00ebn. Martesa, n\u00eb fakt, nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb mjet puro p\u00ebr vetmin\u00eb, nuk mbush nj\u00eb boshll\u00ebk afektiv, nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb \u00abfarmaci\u00bb e thirrur p\u00ebr t\u00eb furnizuar anestetik\u00eb afektiv\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb mbushur boshll\u00ebqe t\u00eb brendshme: \u00abKriza e beqaris\u00eb dhe kriza e jet\u00ebs n\u00eb \u00e7ift jan\u00eb shfaqur s\u00eb bashku.<\/p>\n

N\u00eb t\u00eb nj\u00ebjt\u00ebn koh\u00eb kur shum\u00eb prif\u00ebrinj dhe shum\u00eb persona t\u00eb jet\u00ebs rregulltare e braktisin jet\u00ebn e beqaris\u00eb, shohim shum\u00eb bashk\u00ebshort\u00eb tek v\u00ebn\u00eb n\u00eb diskutim \u00e7\u00ebshtjen e angazhimit t\u00eb tyre t\u00eb nd\u00ebrsjell\u00eb […]. N\u00eb fakt, martes\u00eb e beqari jan\u00eb dy m\u00ebnyra p\u00ebr t\u00eb jetuar n\u00eb bashk\u00ebsin\u00eb e krishter\u00eb, q\u00eb e mb\u00ebshtesin nj\u00ebra-tjetr\u00ebn […]. Edhe personat e martuar, jan\u00eb nj\u00eb d\u00ebshmi p\u00ebr ata q\u00eb kan\u00eb zgjedhur nj\u00eb jet\u00eb beqarie, duke iu kujtuar atyre se dashuria e Hyjit b\u00ebn t\u00eb mundura marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie njer\u00ebzore t\u00eb pasura dhe krijuese, ata u kujtojn\u00eb beqar\u00ebve q\u00eb edhe beqar\u00ebt jetojn\u00eb nj\u00eb marr\u00ebveshje dhe jan\u00eb nuse e dh\u00ebndra\u00bb31<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Beqaria ruhet duke u kujdesuar p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb hap\u00ebsir\u00eb afektive, n\u00eb rast t\u00eb kund\u00ebrt k\u00ebrkohen tjet\u00ebrkund kompensiacione p\u00ebr nj\u00eb boshll\u00ebk q\u00eb mbetet i till\u00eb.<\/p>\n

4. Nj\u00eb p\u00ebrshpirt\u00ebri bashkimi<\/strong><\/p>\n

B\u00ebhet fjal\u00eb t\u00eb edukohet gjat\u00eb etap\u00ebs formuese q\u00eb t\u00eb jetohet s\u00eb bashku n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb v\u00ebllaz\u00ebrore, duke kund\u00ebrshtuar pretendimin e vet\u00ebmjaftueshm\u00ebris\u00eb: \u00abShpesh prift\u00ebrinjt\u00eb jan\u00eb formuar t\u00eb jen\u00eb luft\u00ebtar\u00eb t\u00eb vetmuar, p\u00ebr t\u00eb jetuar vet\u00ebm, shpirt\u00ebrisht dhe praktikisht, me nj\u00eb stil jete q\u00eb gati nuk dallohet nga ai i atyre q\u00eb jan\u00eb singles […]. Kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb edhe si konkluzion i faktit se dimensioni shpirt\u00ebror i \u201cneve\u201d p\u00ebr shum\u00eb nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb familjar dhe do t\u00eb duhej t\u00eb rimerrej p\u00ebr arsye t\u00eb d\u00ebshmis\u00eb dhe t\u00eb pranis\u00eb s\u00eb Krishtit p\u00ebrpara se p\u00ebr arsye praktike\u00bb32<\/sup>. Dy elemente mund ta favorizojn\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb p\u00ebrshpirt\u00ebri, e do t\u00eb duhej t\u00eb verifikoheshin gjat\u00eb ecjes formuese. B\u00ebhet fjal\u00eb p\u00ebr dy elemente t\u00eb kund\u00ebrta por paradoksalisht t\u00eb nd\u00ebrlidhura nj\u00ebra me tjetr\u00ebn: miq\u00ebsit\u00eb dhe aft\u00ebsit\u00eb p\u00ebr ta jetuar vetmin\u00eb.<\/p>\n

a) T\u00eb dish ta jetosh vetmin\u00eb<\/strong><\/p>\n

I nj\u00ebjti modalitet p\u00ebr t\u00eb komunikuar b\u00ebhet m\u00eb autentik kur lind nga heshtja dhe di t\u00eb respektoj\u00eb heshtjen, misterin e pashprehsh\u00ebm prej t\u00eb cilit p\u00ebrb\u00ebhemi: \u00abKur duam dik\u00eb, g\u00ebzojm\u00eb p\u00ebr heshtjet e p\u00ebrbashk\u00ebta si nj\u00eb intimitet tejet i thell\u00eb. Fjal\u00ebt q\u00eb bashk\u00ebndajm\u00eb lindin nga heshtja e na \u00e7ojn\u00eb n\u00eb t\u00eb. Heshtja e bashk\u00ebndar\u00eb nga dashuria nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb munges\u00eb zhurme, por intensitet e nj\u00eb pranie t\u00eb nd\u00ebrsjell\u00eb. Mizikant\u00ebt e din\u00eb se hashtja mes notave \u00ebsht\u00eb pjes\u00eb e muzik\u00ebs aq sa vet\u00eb notat. Muzika modelon heshtjen dhe e b\u00ebn shpreh\u00ebse\u00bb33<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Familjariteti me vetmin\u00eb, q\u00eb lind nga familjariteti me heshtjen, \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb bank\u00eb prove e domosdoshme p\u00ebr t\u00eb ardhmen e meshtarit dhe t\u00eb rregulltarit, q\u00eb n\u00eb kusht apo n\u00eb premtim t\u00eb beqaris\u00eb mohon q\u00eb t\u00eb jetoj\u00eb me nj\u00eb person p\u00ebrkrah vetes, si mohim t\u00eb raportit eksluziv me nj\u00eb person tjet\u00ebr; \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb prove q\u00eb duhet t\u00eb p\u00ebrshkohet q\u00eb t\u00eb mund t\u00eb njihet misteri i dashuris\u00eb s\u00eb Hyjit, \u00abm\u00eb brenda meje sesa vetja ime\u00bb (sh\u00ebn Agustini).<\/p>\n

Rregulltari dhe prezbiteri jan\u00eb thelb\u00ebsisht t\u00eb thirrur p\u00ebr t\u00eb q\u00ebndruar vet\u00ebm me Zotin, dhe p\u00ebr t\u00eb hyr\u00eb n\u00eb intimitet me misterin e Tij t\u00eb heshtjes: \u00abN\u00eb t\u00eb gjith\u00eb ungjijt\u00eb, Fjala del n\u00eb pah nga heshtja. N\u00eb Ungjillin e Luk\u00ebs \u00ebsht\u00eb heshtja e Zakaris\u00eb s\u00eb varf\u00ebr e t\u00eb vjet\u00ebr, q\u00eb b\u00ebhet memec nga engj\u00eblli Gabriel, sepse ka dyshuar se Elizabeta do t\u00eb mund t\u00eb kishte pasur nj\u00eb f\u00ebmiij\u00eb. N\u00eb Ungjillin e Mateut \u00ebsht\u00eb heshtja marramend\u00ebse mes Jozefit e Maris\u00eb, kur ajo i thot\u00eb risin\u00eb para martes\u00ebs. Dhe n\u00eb Ungjillin e Markut \u00ebsht\u00eb z\u00ebri i atij q\u00eb b\u00ebrtet n\u00eb shkret\u00ebtir\u00eb \u2013 z\u00ebri q\u00eb me koh\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb harruar i profecis\u00eb q\u00eb thyen heshtjen e shkret\u00ebtir\u00ebs e t\u00eb koh\u00ebs\u00bb34<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Duhet edhe sakt\u00ebsuar se kush nuk di t\u00eb q\u00ebndroj\u00eb mir\u00eb me vetveten, me v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi do t\u00eb dij\u00eb t\u00eb ket\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie t\u00eb mira me t\u00eb kthjell\u00ebta me t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt. Ndjenja e vetmis\u00eb shoq\u00ebron vet\u00eb jet\u00ebn martesore sepse \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb aspekt i brendsh\u00ebm, nj\u00eb boshll\u00ebk, q\u00eb askush nuk mund ta mbush\u00eb; kjo pamund\u00ebsi, kurdo q\u00eb t\u00eb mos pranohet, mund t\u00eb \u00e7oj\u00eb n\u00eb investime zhg\u00ebnjyese mbi tjetrin\/tjetr\u00ebn, ose n\u00eb pretendime t\u00eb parealizueshme, deri n\u00eb falimentimin e bashkimit. \u00cbsht\u00eb gjithmon\u00eb nj\u00eb fund i vetvetes q\u00eb nuk i dilet t\u00eb bashk\u00ebndahet, nj\u00eb boshll\u00ebk q\u00eb s\u2019mund t\u00eb mbushet: marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnia, edhe m\u00eb e arritura, nuk mund t\u00eb jet\u00eb kurr\u00eb shkrirje simbiotike me tjetrin35<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

T\u00eb pranohet vetmia personale \u00ebsht\u00eb shenj\u00eb pjekurie, q\u00eb nuk jemi skllev\u00ebr t\u00eb var\u00ebsis\u00eb afektive, por t\u00eb aft\u00eb p\u00ebr intimitet, p\u00ebr besnik\u00ebri e pra, p\u00ebr miq\u00ebsi, duke pranuar, kurdo q\u00eb t\u00eb jet\u00eb e nevojshme, t\u00eb vihemi m\u00ebnjan\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb mir\u00ebn e tjetrit.<\/p>\n

P\u00ebrvoja e vetmis\u00eb, me vuajtjen e saj, tregon situat\u00ebn ton\u00eb ekzistenciale t\u00eb varf\u00ebris\u00eb, t\u00eb paaft\u00ebsis\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb mbushur zemr\u00ebn q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb bosh; vuajtja q\u00eb ajo sjell, n\u00ebse njihet dhe pranohet si nj\u00eb element karakteristik i t\u00eb qenurit krijes\u00eb dhe jo si nj\u00eb mallkim, mund t\u00eb favorizoj\u00eb cil\u00ebsin\u00eb e marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieve, duke tejkaluar tundimin p\u00ebr t\u00eb instrumentalizuar tjetrin\/tjetr\u00ebn p\u00ebr t\u00eb mbushur boshll\u00ebkun personal t\u00eb brendsh\u00ebm. Dimensioni thelb\u00ebsor q\u00eb \u00e7do njeri p\u00ebrjeton n\u00eb vetmi, \u00ebsht\u00eb pra, shenj\u00eb e nj\u00eb intimiteti q\u00eb duhet ruajtur dhe respektuar: shpirti yn\u00eb nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb pasqyr\u00eb transparente q\u00eb t\u00eb gjith\u00eb mund ta lexojn\u00eb, por ruan nj\u00eb sekret q\u00eb shpesh as ne nuk e njohim.<\/p>\n

Nd\u00ebrsa, vetmia, b\u00ebhet nj\u00eb dimension i paduruesh\u00ebm i ekzistenc\u00ebs kur nuk shoq\u00ebrohet nga pjekuria afektive dhe shpirt\u00ebrore: \u00abP\u00ebrvoja m\u00eb ka bindur se, kur b\u00ebhet fjal\u00eb p\u00ebr beqari, personat jan\u00eb m\u00eb t\u00eb c\u00ebnuesh\u00ebm (t\u00eb brisht\u00eb) n\u00ebse nuk kan\u00eb nj\u00eb jet\u00eb shpirt\u00ebrore t\u00eb pjekur n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00ebrshtatshme. \u00cbsht\u00eb vet\u00ebm n\u00ebp\u00ebrmjet lutjes q\u00eb ndierit vet\u00ebm mund t\u00eb shnd\u00ebrrohet n\u00eb vetmi. Kur ke shp\u00ebtuar nga ndjenja e izolimit me lutjen e p\u00ebrditshme dhe je i aft\u00eb t\u00eb q\u00ebndrosh vet\u00ebm, at\u00ebher\u00eb mund t\u00eb b\u00ebhesh nj\u00eb pjes\u00eb e bashk\u00ebsis\u00eb\u00bb36<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

b) Prania e marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieve t\u00eb sh\u00ebndosha<\/strong><\/p>\n

Dokumenti q\u00eb tashm\u00eb kemi kujtuar mbi formimin e meshtar\u00ebve, Pastores dabo vobis, sheh n\u00eb aft\u00ebsin\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb jetuar s\u00eb bashku e p\u00ebr t\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb bashkim nj\u00eb prej shenjave dalluese t\u00eb jet\u00ebs ugjillore: \u00abMe nj\u00eb r\u00ebnd\u00ebsi t\u00eb ve\u00e7ant\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb aft\u00ebsia e marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieve me t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt, element me t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb thelb\u00ebsor p\u00ebr at\u00eb q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb i thirrur q\u00eb t\u00eb jet\u00eb p\u00ebrgjegj\u00ebs i nj\u00eb bashk\u00ebsie e q\u00eb t\u00eb jet\u00eb \u201cnjeri bashkimi\u201d […]. Njer\u00ebzimi i sot\u00ebm, shpesh i d\u00ebnuar me situatat e masifikimit dhe t\u00eb vetmis\u00eb, mbi t\u00eb gjitha n\u00eb p\u00ebrqendrimet e m\u00ebdha urbane, b\u00ebhet gjithnj\u00eb e m\u00eb shum\u00eb i ndjesh\u00ebm p\u00ebr vler\u00ebn e bashkimit: kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb sot nj\u00ebra prej shenjave m\u00eb shpreh\u00ebse dhe nj\u00ebra prej udh\u00ebve m\u00eb efikase t\u00eb mesazhit ungjillor\u00bb37<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Jo rast\u00ebsisht nj\u00eb karakteristik\u00eb e dhimbshme tek njer\u00ebzit q\u00eb jan\u00eb njollosur me pedofili dhe me abuzime seksuale, \u00ebsht\u00eb mungesa e marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieve n\u00eb t\u00eb nj\u00ebjtin nivel, dometh\u00ebn\u00eb me miq\u00ebsi falas, t\u00eb p\u00ebrzem\u00ebrt, ku njer\u00ebzit nuk vishen me rolet q\u00eb kan\u00eb ose detyrat e jet\u00ebs s\u00eb zakonshme, as ku marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnia shnd\u00ebrrohet n\u00eb ushtrim fuqie, shantazh afektiv, nga nj\u00ebra an\u00eb apo tjetra.<\/p>\n

Nd\u00ebrsa, marr\u00ebdh\u00ebniet tejet t\u00eb varf\u00ebra t\u00eb k\u00ebtyre personave, p\u00ebr m\u00eb tep\u00ebr q\u00eb jetohen n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb \u00abt\u00eb mbrojtur\u00bb, me njer\u00ebz m\u00eb t\u00eb vegj\u00ebl, p\u00ebr mosh\u00eb, ose rol, duke ushtruar nj\u00eb shtr\u00ebngim t\u00eb fort\u00eb p\u00ebrball\u00eb tyre, me gjas\u00eb sepse jan\u00eb t\u00eb paaft\u00eb t\u00eb relacionohen n\u00eb m\u00ebnyra t\u00eb tjera… persona, pra, thell\u00ebsisht vet\u00ebm, t\u00eb plagosur, t\u00eb zhg\u00ebnjyer dhe n\u00eb ankth: \u00abP\u00ebrse dikush do t\u00eb donte t\u00eb kishte marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie emotive me nj\u00eb t\u00eb vog\u00ebl sepse \u00ebsht\u00eb i paaft\u00eb t\u00eb relacionohet me moshatar\u00ebt e vet? Prania e marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieve t\u00eb mira t\u00eb barabarta, besoj se \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb element thelb\u00ebsor. N\u00eb t\u00eb kund\u00ebrt, mungesa e tipeve t\u00eb tilla marr\u00ebdh\u00ebniesh tregon se nj\u00eb individ nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb i gatsh\u00ebm p\u00ebr Urdhrin Shenjt\u00bb38<\/sup>. Aft\u00ebsia p\u00ebr t\u00eb nd\u00ebrmarr\u00eb e p\u00ebr t\u00eb kultivuar marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie t\u00eb sh\u00ebndosha, n\u00eb kuptimin e treguar, \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb shenj\u00eb e r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme pjekurie dhe sh\u00ebndeti shpirt\u00ebror e psikologjik, e p\u00ebr m\u00eb shum\u00eb nj\u00eb ndihm\u00eb p\u00ebr nj\u00eb \u00abkthim afektiv\u00bb.<\/p>\n

Nxitja Pastores dabo vobis sheh n\u00eb aft\u00ebsin\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb kultivuar p\u00ebrvoja t\u00eb sh\u00ebndosha e t\u00eb thella miq\u00ebsie nj\u00eb shenj\u00eb t\u00eb r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme pjekurie afektive: \u00abMeqen\u00ebse karizma e beqaris\u00eb, edhe kur \u00ebsht\u00eb autentike dhe e provuar, i l\u00eb t\u00eb paprekura prirjet e afektivitetit dhe shtytjet e instinktit, kandidad\u00ebt p\u00ebr meshtari kan\u00eb nevoj\u00eb p\u00ebr nj\u00eb pjekuri afektive t\u00eb aft\u00eb p\u00ebr kujdes, p\u00ebr mohim ndaj gjith\u00e7kaje q\u00eb mund ta sulmoj\u00eb, p\u00ebr vigjilenc\u00eb mbi trupin e mbi shpirtin, p\u00ebr vler\u00ebsim dhe respekt n\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebniet nd\u00ebrpersonale me burrat e me grat\u00eb. Nj\u00eb ndihm\u00eb e \u00e7muar mund t\u00eb jepet nga nj\u00eb edukim i p\u00ebrshtatsh\u00ebm p\u00ebr miq\u00ebsi t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb, n\u00eb p\u00ebrngjasim t\u00eb lidhjeve afektive v\u00ebllaz\u00ebrore, q\u00eb vet\u00eb Krishti i ka jetuar n\u00eb ekzistenc\u00ebn e tij\u00bb39<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Dashuria, miq\u00ebsia, afekti, n\u00eb format e tyre t\u00eb ndryshme paraqesin gjithnj\u00eb nj\u00eb komponent p\u00ebrvujt\u00ebrie, rinjohjeje t\u00eb mosmjaftueshm\u00ebris\u00eb personale p\u00ebr t\u00eb jetuar n\u00eb plot\u00ebsi. Miq\u00ebsia sigurisht mund t\u00eb jetohet n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb shum\u00ebvlefshme, si t\u00eb gjitha realitetet njer\u00ebzore: \u00e7do etap\u00eb e jet\u00ebs s\u00eb pranishme paraqet kthesa t\u00eb ndryshme t\u00eb mundshme, ajo nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb kurr\u00eb me nj\u00eb drejtim t\u00eb vet\u00ebm, kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb pasuria por edhe dyshimi i arritjeve t\u00eb mundshme q\u00eb i jan\u00eb besuar liris\u00eb njer\u00ebzore, dhe nj\u00eb rrezik i till\u00eb p\u00ebrfshin edhe marr\u00ebdh\u00ebniet e miq\u00ebsis\u00eb.<\/p>\n

Shum\u00eb kriza thirrorelindin nga ky keqkuptim relacional, q\u00eb nuk i sjell ndihm\u00eb atij q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb n\u00eb v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi dhe prish t\u00eb nj\u00ebjt\u00ebn marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie, duke e ngarkuar me pritje jo reale. Nj\u00eb meshtar na thoshte n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb konfidenciale se n\u00eb momente krize nuk shkonte tek persona q\u00eb ishin miq t\u00eb vet, mbi t\u00eb gjitha n\u00ebse n\u00eb ndonj\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb ndihej afektivisht i t\u00ebrhequr prej tyre, sepse n\u00eb at\u00eb situat\u00eb ndihej n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb ve\u00e7ant\u00eb i c\u00ebnuesh\u00ebm dhe i ekzpozuar: ai preferonte m\u00eb shum\u00eb t\u2019u drejtohej atyre q\u00eb kishin bashk\u00ebndar\u00eb t\u00eb nj\u00ebjt\u00ebn zgjedhje jete. Edhe Jezusi, n\u00eb momentin e kriz\u00ebs, ka k\u00ebrkuar shoq\u00ebrin\u00eb e t\u00eb vet\u00ebve, megjith\u00ebse ka pasur mund\u00ebsi t\u00eb tjera, ndoshta m\u00eb ngush\u00eblluese se ato q\u00eb kan\u00eb mundur t\u2019ia japin Pjetri, Jakobi dhe Gjoni (krhs. Mt. 26, 36-46).<\/p>\n

Shenjat e miq\u00ebsis\u00eb autentike njihen edhe nga aft\u00ebsia e hapjes, nga lakueshm\u00ebria, nga mungesa e d\u00ebshir\u00ebs p\u00ebr zot\u00ebrim, nga d\u00ebshira e s\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00ebs, nga aft\u00ebsia p\u00ebr t\u2019u p\u00ebrballuar me t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt dhe me nevojat e jet\u00ebs, nga gatishm\u00ebria p\u00ebr t\u2019u bindur… Personi afektivisht i pjekur ka prirjen p\u00ebr t\u00eb k\u00ebrkuar at\u00eb q\u00eb mund ta b\u00ebj\u00eb t\u00eb lumtur tjetrin, megjith\u00ebse sjell nj\u00eb flijim p\u00ebr vetveten, duke m\u00ebsuar q\u00eb ta lexoj\u00eb zemr\u00ebn e tij.<\/p>\n

5. Gatishm\u00ebria p\u00ebr t\u00eb m\u00ebsuar<\/strong><\/p>\n

Mund t\u00eb kuptohet si \u00abvler\u00ebsimi realist i aft\u00ebsive vetjake dhe i mund\u00ebsive, por edhe gatishm\u00ebria e p\u00ebrzem\u00ebrt p\u00ebr t\u2019u lejuar p\u00ebr t\u2019u p\u00ebrfshir\u00eb n\u00eb nj\u00eb pro\u00e7es zhvillimi, dhe vullneti p\u00ebr t\u00eb m\u00ebsuar p\u00ebr gjith\u00eb jet\u00ebn\u00bb40<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Gatishm\u00ebria p\u00ebr t\u00eb m\u00ebsuar tregon se personi \u00ebsht\u00eb i nxitur jo nga detyra, por nga d\u00ebshira p\u00ebr t\u2019u rritur: vendimi b\u00ebhet fryt i nj\u00eb begenisjeje, i nj\u00eb p\u00ebrgjigjeje t\u00eb d\u00ebgjueshme q\u00eb prek zemr\u00ebn. Kur shpirti \u00ebsht\u00eb i ndezur p\u00ebr nj\u00eb ideal, p\u00ebr nj\u00eb vler\u00eb, p\u00ebr nj\u00eb projekt jete, megjith\u00ebse duke njohur n\u00eb vetvete ndrojtje, frik\u00eb dhe v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi, jo p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb lejon t\u00eb ndalet, sepse v\u00ebren pranin\u00eb e nj\u00eb force t\u00eb mir\u00eb, e aft\u00eb t\u2019i p\u00ebrballoj\u00eb e t\u2019i kaloj\u00eb, me nj\u00eb paqe e siguri q\u00eb nuk i ka dalluar kurr\u00eb m\u00eb par\u00eb.<\/p>\n

Nga pik\u00ebpamja psikologjike, d\u00ebshira mund t\u00eb p\u00ebrkufizohet me aft\u00ebsin\u00eb p\u00ebr \u00abt\u00eb kanalizuar t\u00eb gjitha energjit\u00eb tona n\u00eb drejtim t\u00eb nj\u00eb objekti q\u00eb ne e vler\u00ebsojm\u00eb qendror p\u00ebr ne. Nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb, pra, shtytja e verb\u00ebr, d\u00ebshira e \u00e7mendur, instinkti q\u00eb shtyn n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb pakontrollueshme, por nj\u00eb prirje dometh\u00ebn\u00ebse drejt nj\u00eb gj\u00ebje q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb e vler\u00ebsuar n\u00eb vetvete\u00bb41<\/sup>. D\u00ebshira \u00ebsht\u00eb, pra, nj\u00ebfar\u00eb \u201czinxhiri\u201d i aft\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb bashkuar njohjen, imagjinimin dhe afektin. T\u00eb njoh\u00ebsh e t\u00eb konkretizosh n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00ebrshtatshme d\u00ebshir\u00ebn \u00ebsht\u00eb themelore sepse do t\u00eb thot\u00eb t\u00eb dish at\u00eb q\u00eb d\u00ebshiron nga jeta jote, e t\u00eb jesh i gatsh\u00ebm t\u00eb p\u00ebrballosh rreziqe, mohime, t\u00eb kalosh pengesa p\u00ebr ta realizuar.<\/p>\n

Duke parafrazuar psikologun Kubie, d\u00ebshira lejon t\u00eb kryhet i nj\u00ebjti tip shnd\u00ebrrimi q\u00eb zgjat, dhe dometh\u00ebn\u00eb \u00abt\u00eb nd\u00ebrrohet n\u00eb aft\u00ebsin\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb nd\u00ebrruar\u00bb42<\/sup>: kjo lejon t\u00eb sillet rregull n\u00eb \u00e7rregullsi. Nj\u00eb shenj\u00eb e s\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00ebs dhe e autenticitetit t\u00eb d\u00ebshir\u00ebs dhe q\u00eb ajo b\u00ebn t\u00eb veprohet nj\u00eb ristrukturim rr\u00ebnj\u00ebsor, e \u00abt\u00eb vihet rregull n\u00eb jet\u00ebn personale\u00bb, si\u00e7 do t\u00eb thoshte sh\u00ebn Injaci, duke u b\u00ebr\u00eb t\u00eb aft\u00eb p\u00ebr ta shijuar dhe p\u00ebr ta g\u00ebzuar at\u00eb43<\/sup>, me fjal\u00eb t\u00eb tjera p\u00ebr t\u00eb qen\u00eb t\u00eb k\u00ebnaqur.<\/p>\n

6. T\u00eb dish t\u00eb integrosh agresivitetin <\/strong><\/p>\n

Agresiviteti \u00ebsht\u00eb pjes\u00eb e natyr\u00ebs njer\u00ebzore, dhe \u00ebsht\u00eb i domosdosh\u00ebm p\u00ebr t\u00eb jetuar. N\u00eb fakt, \u00ebsht\u00eb pik\u00ebrisht ai q\u00eb na e jep nj\u00eb ndihm\u00eb kur jemi n\u00eb v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi; p\u00ebr antik\u00ebt, agresiviteti dhe zem\u00ebrimi i p\u00ebrkisnin asaj aft\u00ebsie t\u00eb psikes q\u00eb quhet irascibile (gjaknxeht\u00ebsi), e kuptuar si aft\u00ebsi p\u00ebr t\u00eb p\u00ebrballuar pengesat; ajo \u00ebsht\u00eb \u00abk\u00ebmb\u00ebngulja\u00bb q\u00eb furnizon forc\u00eb dhe guxim p\u00ebr t\u00eb mos u mbytur p\u00ebrball\u00eb v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsive, dhe p\u00ebr t\u00eb \u00e7uar n\u00eb nj\u00eb p\u00ebrfundim t\u00eb mbar\u00eb nd\u00ebrmarrjen e konsideruar: \u00abShpirti nganj\u00ebher\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb i detyruar t\u00eb p\u00ebsoj\u00eb nj\u00eb v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi ose nj\u00eb kontrast tek \u00ebsht\u00eb duke arritur nj\u00eb t\u00eb mir\u00eb t\u00eb caktuar ose tek i shmanget nj\u00eb t\u00eb keqeje t\u00eb caktuar, p\u00ebr faktin se k\u00ebto gjenden sip\u00ebr fuqis\u00eb s\u00eb zakonshme t\u00eb qenies shpirt\u00ebrore. E k\u00ebshtu, e mira dhe e keqja, p\u00ebr faktin se paraqiten t\u00eb thikt\u00eb e t\u00eb v\u00ebshtir\u00eb, jan\u00eb objekt i gjaknxeht\u00ebsis\u00eb\u00bb44<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Pa energjin\u00eb q\u00eb arrin nga gjaknxeht\u00ebsia, nj\u00eb atlet nuk do t\u00eb mund ta fitonte kurr\u00eb nj\u00eb gar\u00eb, nj\u00eb student nuk do ta kishte kurr\u00eb guximin t\u00eb paraqitet n\u00eb provim, megjith\u00ebse mund ta njoh\u00eb l\u00ebnd\u00ebn n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00ebrsosur, nuk do t\u00eb mund t\u00eb p\u00ebrfundohej nj\u00eb pun\u00eb, ashtu sikurse do t\u00eb mund t\u00eb rezultonin t\u00eb pamundura koh\u00ebzgjatja dhe q\u00ebndrueshm\u00ebria n\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie.<\/p>\n

Agresiviteti, duke qen\u00eb nj\u00eb komponente psiqike, nj\u00eb \u00abpasion\u00bb sipas klasifikimit t\u00eb antik\u00ebve45<\/sup>, \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb p\u00ebrpara nivelit moral dhe pra, do t\u00eb ishte e kot\u00eb t\u00eb b\u00ebhej pyetja lidhur me mir\u00ebsin\u00eb e tij t\u00eb mundshme. Lexohet lidhur me k\u00ebt\u00eb n\u00eb Katekizmin e Kish\u00ebs Katolike: \u00abPasionet, n\u00eb vetvete, nuk jan\u00eb as t\u00eb mira as t\u00eb k\u00ebqija. Nuk kan\u00eb nj\u00eb cil\u00ebsim moral p\u00ebrve\u00e7se n\u00eb at\u00eb mas\u00eb q\u00eb varen efektivisht nga arsyeja e nga vullneti\u00bb46<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

Pasionet jan\u00eb nj\u00eb forc\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u2019i kanalizuar: n\u00ebse drejtimi \u00ebsht\u00eb i mir\u00eb do t\u00eb b\u00ebhet e mira, por n\u00ebse \u00ebsht\u00eb i keq fryti do t\u00eb jet\u00eb i keq; porse p\u00ebrgjegj\u00ebsia nuk q\u00ebndron tek pasioni si i till\u00eb, por n\u00eb drejtimin q\u00eb i jepet. \u00cbsht\u00eb zgjedhja e subjektit q\u00eb u jep karakteristika morale pasioneve: ai mund t\u2019i p\u00ebrdor\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb p\u00ebrballuar v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsit\u00eb apostolike t\u00eb nj\u00eb misioni, ose p\u00ebr t\u00eb vjedhur nj\u00eb bank\u00eb.<\/p>\n

Nj\u00eb njohje e mjaftueshme e vetvetes, s\u00eb bashku me d\u00ebgjimin dhe me shprehjen e bot\u00ebs vetjake afektive, do t\u00eb ndihmoj\u00eb n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb shum\u00eb efikase integrimin e agresivitetit, q\u00eb mbetet nj\u00eb energji e v\u00ebn\u00eb n\u00eb sh\u00ebrbim t\u00eb shpres\u00ebs.<\/p>\n

Mohimi i zem\u00ebrimit nuk sjell sigurisht nj\u00eb jet\u00eb m\u00eb t\u00eb leht\u00eb e t\u00eb qet\u00eb, ajo madje acarohet; ndjenjat rebelohen kur nuk d\u00ebgjohen, kur nuk gjejn\u00eb vendin e tyre t\u00eb p\u00ebrshtatsh\u00ebm. Dhe rrjedhojat mund t\u00eb jen\u00eb shum\u00eb t\u00eb r\u00ebnda, p\u00ebr veten e p\u00ebr t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt: n\u00eb baz\u00eb t\u00eb shum\u00eb episodeve t\u00eb pedofilis\u00eb dhe t\u00eb devijimeve gjendet pik\u00ebrisht agresiviteti i mohuar. Don Rossetti q\u00eb kemi kujtuar tashm\u00eb, vinte n\u00eb pah mes karakteristikave t\u00eb vazhdueshme t\u00eb personalitetit t\u00eb atij q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb njollosur me abuzime mbi t\u00eb vegj\u00ebl lidhjen e ngusht\u00eb mes shtypjes s\u00eb zem\u00ebrimit dhe devijimit: \u00abMund t\u00eb jet\u00eb marramend\u00ebse q\u00eb n\u00ebn shum\u00eb devijime dhe patologji seksuale gjendet nj\u00eb form\u00eb zem\u00ebrimi i fort\u00eb, ose zem\u00ebrimi q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb erotizuar. Kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb e v\u00ebrtet\u00eb n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb ve\u00e7ant\u00eb p\u00ebr abuzimet seksuale t\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebve […].<\/p>\n

Shum\u00eb m\u00eb kan\u00eb th\u00ebn\u00eb se kur b\u00ebnin k\u00ebt\u00eb p\u00ebrpiqeshin t\u2019u jepnin k\u00ebtyre f\u00ebmij\u00ebve dashurin\u00eb e nj\u00eb figure at\u00ebsore, at\u00eb dashuri q\u00eb ata nuk e mor\u00ebn kur ishin f\u00ebmij\u00eb prej baballar\u00ebve t\u00eb tyre. N\u00eb \u00e7do rast, abuzimi seksual mbi f\u00ebmij\u00ebt \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb akt shkat\u00ebrrues q\u00eb lind nga zem\u00ebrimi i tyre dhe dhuna e maskuar, q\u00eb i shtron p\u00ebrdhe viktimat. Ata jan\u00eb duke rijetuar dhun\u00ebn e p\u00ebsuar q\u00eb n\u00eb f\u00ebmiij\u00ebri me t\u00eb nj\u00ebjtat rezultate shkat\u00ebrrimtare. \u201cPrej fryteve t\u00eb tyre do t\u2019i njihni\u201d. Frytet e d\u00ebmshme t\u00eb abuzimeve seksuale mbi f\u00ebmij\u00ebt i heqin mask\u00ebn zem\u00ebrimit dhe dhun\u00ebs t\u00eb pranish\u00ebm n\u00eb brend\u00ebsi\u00bb47<\/sup>. P\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb, nj\u00ebri prej hapave themelor\u00eb n\u00eb kur\u00ebn ndaj k\u00ebtyre personave, xhelat\u00eb apo viktima qofshin, \u00ebsht\u00eb para s\u00eb gjithash t\u00eb pranohet r\u00ebnd\u00ebsia q\u00eb zem\u00ebrimi ka n\u00eb at\u00eb q\u00eb ka ndodhur: \u00abZem\u00ebrimi i p\u00ebrforcuar \u00ebsht\u00eb l\u00ebnda q\u00eb ushqen nj\u00eb devijim seksual n\u00eb jet\u00eb\u00bb48<\/sup>.<\/p>\n

T\u00eb ndiqen k\u00ebto udh\u00ebzime \u00ebsht\u00eb, njer\u00ebzisht duke folur, parandalimi m\u00eb i mir\u00eb jo vet\u00ebm p\u00ebrball\u00eb abuzimeve t\u00eb mundshme, por n\u00eb p\u00ebrgjith\u00ebsi n\u00eb drejtim t\u00eb pjes\u00ebs m\u00eb t\u00eb madhe t\u00eb problemeve e t\u00eb v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsive q\u00eb takojn\u00eb prift\u00ebrinjt\u00eb dhe rregulltar\u00ebt n\u00eb fushat e ndryshme t\u00eb sh\u00ebrbes\u00ebs s\u00eb tyre (paaft\u00ebsia p\u00ebr t\u00eb bashk\u00ebpunuar n\u00eb famulli, intoleranc\u00eb, munges\u00eb d\u00ebgjimi, shkanduj) dhe garanci p\u00ebr nj\u00eb jet\u00eb n\u00eb p\u00ebrputhje me Ungjillin e shpallur.<\/p>\n

Prej k\u00ebtu vjen edhe nevoja p\u00ebr formues t\u00eb aft\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb p\u00ebrgatitur meshtar\u00eb dhe rregulltar\u00eb sipas k\u00ebtyre parimeve.<\/p>\n

SH\u00cbNIME<\/strong>:
\n1. Nevoja e nj\u00eb formimi t\u00eb plot\u00ebsuar njihet nga Nxitja Vita consacrata si nj\u00eb nga detyrat par\u00ebsore p\u00ebr at\u00eb q\u00eb ka zgjedhur ndjekjen e plot\u00eb t\u00eb Zotit: \u00abDuhet t\u00eb jet\u00eb formim i t\u00ebr\u00eb personit, n\u00eb \u00e7do aspekt t\u00eb individualitetit t\u00eb tij, n\u00eb sjellje ashtu edhe n\u00eb q\u00ebllime. \u00cbsht\u00eb e qart\u00eb se, pik\u00ebrisht p\u00ebr prirjen e tij drejt shnd\u00ebrrimit t\u00eb t\u00ebr\u00eb personit, angazhimi formues nuk mbaron kurr\u00eb\u00bb (GJON PALI II, Nxitja Apostolike postsinodale Vita consacrata, 25 mars 1996, n. 65).
\n2. GJON PALI II, Nxitja Apostolike postsinodale Pastores dabo vobis, 25 mars 1992, n. 44.
\n3. P.sh.: krhs. Po aty, n. 62.
\n4. B. Giordani, Il colloquio psicologico nella direzione spirituale, Roma, Rogate, 1985, 119; krhs. Edhe L. S. Filippi, Maturit\u00e0 umana e celibato, Brescia, La Scuola, 1973, 125-128.
\n5. GIOVANNI PAOLO II, Letra Enciklike Redemptor hominis, 4 mars 1979, n. 10.
\n6. Krhs. G. Tripani, \u00abLa fragilit\u00e0 vocazionale\u00bb, n\u00eb Bollettino Unione Internazionale Superiori Generali, 139 (2009) 32-41; C. CORBELLA, Resistere o andarsene? Teologia e psicologia di fronte alla fedelt\u00e0 nelle scelte di vita, Bologna, Edb, 2009.
\n7. A. Tapken, \u00abHyrja n\u00eb seminar: presupozime dhe kompetenca\u00bb, n\u00eb Tredimensioni, 3 (2009) 260-267.
\n8. A. TAPKEN, \u00abL\u2019ingresso in seminario\u00bb, vep. cit., 263.
\n9. Krhs. lidhur me k\u00ebt\u00eb G. GUCCI, Il sapore della vita. La dimensione corporea della vita spirituale, Assisi (Pg), Cittadella, 2009, 87-120.
\n10. B. Hume, Operai del vangelo. Diaconi, preti, vescovi, laici. Paoline, Milano, 1992, 30 e vijim.
\n11. J. L. SKA, \u00abNarrativa ed esegesi biblica\u00bb, n\u00eb La Civilt\u00e0 Cattolica, 1991 III 225.227.
\n12. E. BIANCHI, Pregare la parola, Torino, Gribaudi, 1974, 19.
\n13. Krhs. P. RICOEUR, \u00abL\u2019identit\u00e0 personale e l\u2019identit\u00e0 narrativa\u00bb dhe \u00abIl s\u00e9 e l\u2019identit\u00e0 narrativa\u00bb, n\u00eb ID., S\u00e9 come un altro, Milano, Jaca Book, 1993, 201-230; 231-262.
\n14. A. TAPKEN, \u00abL\u2019ingresso in seminario\u00bb, vep.cit., 263 e vijim. Krhs. M. BOTTURA, \u00abTregimi i jet\u00ebs\u00bb, n\u00eb Tredimensioni, 4 (2007) 32-41; A. CENCINI, \u00abRaccontare e raccontarsi (I-II): dalla scoperta del senso all\u2019attribuzione di senso\u00bb, n\u00eb PO ATY, 4 (2007) 249-255; 5 (2008) 20-33.
\n15. Krhs. H. ZOLLNER, \u00abIl S\u00e9 \u2013 contenuto, processi, mistero\u00bb, n\u00eb A. MANENTI, S. GUARINELLI, H. ZOLLNER (eds), Persona e formazione. Riflessioni per la pratica educativa e psicoterapeutica, Bologna, Edb, 2007, 73-99.
\n16. N\u00eb shqip: Thirrje t\u00eb reja p\u00ebr nj\u00eb Europ\u00eb t\u00eb re [sh\u00ebnim i p\u00ebrkthyesit].
\n17. PONTIFICIA OPERA PER LE VOCAZIONI ECCLESIASTICHE, Nuove Vocazioni per una nuova Europa, 6 janar 1998, n. 37. Dokumenti specifikon se k\u00ebto kushte duhet t\u00eb jen\u00eb t\u00eb pranishme sipas rendit p\u00ebr pranimin e kandidatit n\u00eb jet\u00ebn meshtarake dhe rregulltare: \u00abP\u00ebrsa u p\u00ebrket paq\u00ebndrueshm\u00ebrive, gjithnj\u00eb n\u00eb fush\u00ebn afektivo-seksuale, nj\u00eb shoshitje e v\u00ebmendshme do t\u00eb duhej t\u00eb mbante parasysh qend\u00ebrsin\u00eb e k\u00ebsaj fushe n\u00eb evolucionin e p\u00ebrgjithsh\u00ebm t\u00eb t\u00eb riut dhe n\u00eb kultur\u00ebn aktuale. Nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb kaq e \u00e7uditshme dhe e rrall\u00eb q\u00eb i riu t\u00eb tregoj\u00eb dob\u00ebsi specifike n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb sektor. Me \u00e7\u2019kushte mund t\u00eb pranohet me kujdes k\u00ebrkesa thirrore e t\u00eb rinjve me k\u00ebto tipe problemesh? Kushti \u00ebsht\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb jen\u00eb s\u00eb bashku k\u00ebto tri karakteristika\u00bb (PO ATY).
\n18. W. MASTERS, V. JOHNSON, La respuesta sexual humana, Buoenos Aires, Interm\u00e9dica, 1978, 34.
\n19. \u00abI riu le t\u00eb jet\u00eb i nd\u00ebrgjegjsh\u00ebm p\u00ebr rr\u00ebnj\u00ebn e problemit t\u00eb vet, q\u00eb shum\u00eb shpesh nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb seksual n\u00eb zanafill\u00eb\u00bb (VEPRA PAPNORE P\u00cbR THIRRJET KISHTARE, Nuove vocazioni per una nuova Europa, vep.cit., n. 37).
\n20 L. RULLA, Antropologia della vocazione cristiana. I. Basi interdisciplinari, Bologna, Edb, 1997, 251. V\u00ebzhgime shum\u00eb t\u00eb ngjashme n\u00eb Ionata: \u00abVet\u00ebtranshendenca e njeriut \u00ebsht\u00eb e rr\u00ebnjosur akoma n\u00eb thell\u00ebsit\u00eb biologjike t\u00eb qenies s\u00eb tij, si\u00e7 mund t\u00eb tregohet me nj\u00eb paradoks: edhe syri njer\u00ebzor \u00ebsht\u00eb vet\u00ebtranshendent. Aft\u00ebsia e syrit p\u00ebr t\u00eb perceptuar bot\u00ebn q\u00eb na rrethon varet absolutisht nga paaft\u00ebsia p\u00ebr t\u00eb perceptuar vetveten. Kur syri e sheh vetveten? Vet\u00ebm kur \u00ebsht\u00eb i s\u00ebmur\u00eb [\u2026]. K\u00ebshtu, vet\u00ebrealizimi, nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb q\u00ebllimi i fundit i njeriut dhe as q\u00ebllimi i tij i par\u00eb. N\u00ebse mbetet si q\u00ebllim p\u00ebr vetveten, kund\u00ebrshton karakteristik\u00ebn vet\u00ebtranshendente t\u00eb ekzistenc\u00ebs. Si k\u00ebnaq\u00ebsia, vet\u00ebrealizimi \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb efekt, efekti p\u00ebr t\u00eb kryer nj\u00eb dometh\u00ebnie [\u2026]. Si \u201cboomerang-u\u201d q\u00eb kthehet tek gjahtari, q\u00eb e ka gjuajtur, vet\u00ebm n\u00ebse mungon shenja, k\u00ebshtu njeriu kthehet tek vetvetja dhe priret me q\u00ebllim p\u00ebr t\u2019u vet\u00ebrealizuar vet\u00ebm n\u00ebse ka falimentuar misionin e tij q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb vet\u00ebtranshendenca\u00bb (P. IONATA, Psicoterapia e problematiche religiose. Esperienze, potenzialit\u00e0 e limiti, Roma, Citt\u00e0 Nuova, 1991, 138).
\n21. K. WOJTYLA, Amore e responsabilit\u00e0. Morale sessuale e vita interpersonale, Torino, Marietti, 1980, 187 e n\u00eb vijim.
\n22. R. CANTALAMESSA, Verginit\u00e0, Milano, Ancora, 1988, 74. P\u00ebr nj\u00eb ekspozim m\u00eb t\u00eb gjer\u00eb krhs. S. GUARINELLI, Il celibato dei preti. Perch\u00e9 sceglierlo ancora?, Milano, Paoline, 2008.
\n23. A. CENCINI, Nell\u2019amore. Libert\u00e0 e maturit\u00e0 affettiva nel celibato consacrato, Bologna, Edb, 1995, 94.
\n24. \u00abN\u00eb rastin e orientimit ndaj rolit, individi mund t\u00eb shtyhet kryesisht nga arsye t\u00eb brendshme t\u00eb vet\u00eb rolit; dometh\u00ebn\u00eb, ai \u00ebsht\u00eb i motivuar ta jetoj\u00eb mir\u00eb rolin e tij kryesisht si rrjedhoj\u00eb e k\u00ebnaq\u00ebsis\u00eb q\u00eb ky rol i jep. K\u00ebshtu, shp\u00ebrblimi i nevojave m\u00eb t\u00eb thella t\u00eb individit n\u00ebp\u00ebrmjet rolit, mund t\u00eb b\u00ebhet, n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb nd\u00ebrgjegjshme apo t\u00eb pand\u00ebrgjegjshme, nxit\u00ebsi qendror\u00bb (L. RULLA, Antropologia della vocazione cristiana. I, vep. cit., 376).
\n25. PO ATY, 377.
\n26. P\u00ebr nj\u00eb trajtim m\u00eb specifik krhs. G. CUCCI, La forza della debolezza, Roma, AdP, 2007, 238-279.
\n27. Mohimi mund t\u00eb p\u00ebrkufizohet si \u00abnj\u00eb gjendje emotive, me karakteristikat e nj\u00eb shqet\u00ebsimi dhe pasigurie, q\u00eb vijn\u00eb nga nj\u00eb munges\u00eb k\u00ebnaq\u00ebsie sepse \u00ebsht\u00eb humbur nj\u00eb nevoj\u00eb e pranishme, por q\u00eb nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb dometh\u00ebn\u00ebse nga ana funksionale\u00bb. (L. RULLA, Psicologia del profondo e vocazione. La perseveranza, l\u2019efficacia pastorale, il celibato, la leadership e altri aspetti della vita comunitaria, Casale Monferrato [Al], Piemme, 1989, 55).
\n28. Krhs. A. CENCINI, Con amore. Libert\u00e0 e maturit\u00e0 affettiva nel celibato consacrato, Bologna, Edb, 1994, 71-73.
\n29. \u00ab\u00cbsht\u00eb e r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme t\u00eb verifikohet n\u00ebse subjekti \u00ebsht\u00eb i aft\u00eb t\u2019i kontrolloj\u00eb k\u00ebto dob\u00ebsi, p\u00ebr nj\u00eb tejkalim, qoft\u00eb se n\u00eb fakt bie gjithnj\u00eb e m\u00eb pak, qoft\u00eb se prirje t\u00eb tilla e shqet\u00ebsojn\u00eb gjithnj\u00eb e m\u00eb pak jet\u00ebn e tij (edhe psiqike) dhe i lejojn\u00eb t\u00eb zhvilloj\u00eb detyrat e tij normale pa i krijuar tensione t\u00eb tepruara dhe pa e z\u00ebn\u00eb n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb pavolitshme kujdesin e tij\u00bb (VEPRA PAPNORE P\u00cbR THIRRJET KISHTARE, Thirrje t\u00eb reja p\u00ebr nj\u00eb Europ\u00eb t\u00eb re, vep.cit., n. 37).
\n30. Me termin \u00abego-distonike\u00bb, d\u00ebshirohet t\u00eb p\u00ebrshkruhet nj\u00eb realitet psikologjik i jetuar nga subjekti me vuajtje e parehati, duke e njohur si nj\u00eb penges\u00eb: me fjal\u00eb t\u00eb tjera \u00ebsht\u00eb lufta psikologjike q\u00eb ndihet p\u00ebr t\u00eb arritur nj\u00eb vler\u00eb. Nd\u00ebrsa, n\u00eb modalitetin \u00abego-sintonik\u00bb, nj\u00eb realitet i till\u00eb nuk ndihet si nj\u00eb penges\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb jetuar n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb koherente zgjedhjen personale: megjith\u00ebse b\u00ebhet fjal\u00eb p\u00ebr elemente objektivisht t\u00eb r\u00ebnda, subjekti i jeton n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb mbrojt\u00ebse dhe nuk d\u00ebshiron t\u00eb kryej\u00eb nd\u00ebrrime.
\n31. H.J. NOUWEN, I clown di Dio. Una vita spirituale per il nostro tempo, Brescia, Queriniana, 2002, 77 e n\u00eb vijim. \u00cbsht\u00eb dometh\u00ebn\u00ebse se shumica e martesave t\u00eb ish meshtar\u00ebve dhe rregulltar\u00ebve, pas nj\u00eb periudhe fillestare t\u00eb nj\u00eb p\u00ebrshtatjeje t\u00eb fort\u00eb, paraqet nj\u00eb p\u00ebrqindje ndarjesh t\u00eb bashk\u00ebshort\u00ebve t\u00eb dyfisht\u00eb n\u00eb krahasim me at\u00eb mesatare; krhs. Rezultatet e nj\u00eb k\u00ebrkimi lidhur me k\u00ebt\u00eb: \u00abN\u00eb martesat e ish-meshtar\u00ebve n\u00eb koh\u00eb t\u00eb gjata takohet nj\u00eb tregues tensioni bashk\u00ebshortor i dyfisht\u00eb n\u00eb krahasim me martesat e zakonshme, gj\u00eb q\u00eb tregon mund\u00ebsin\u00eb se tensioni, i zvog\u00ebluar me braktisjen e meshtaris\u00eb, priret t\u00eb riparaqitet n\u00eb rolin e ri pas nj\u00eb qet\u00ebsie t\u00eb p\u00ebrkohshme\u00bb, n\u00eb R. LATOURELLE [botues], Il Vaticano II. Bilancio e prospettive, Assisi [Pg], Cittadella, 1987, vol. II, 1186).
\n32. A. TAPKEN, \u00abL\u2019ingresso in seminario\u00bb, vep.cit., 266.
\n33. TH. RADCLIFFE, Perch\u00e9 andare in chiesa?, Cinisello Balsamo (Mi), San Paolo, 2009, 53.
\n34. B. TAYLOR, When Godi s Silent, n\u00eb TH. RADCLIFFE, Perch\u00e9 andare in Chiesa?, vep.cit., 52.
\n35. \u00ab\u00cbsht\u00eb nj\u00eb ide iluzore e jet\u00ebs emotive q\u00eb dy gjysma, dy pjes\u00eb, t\u00eb formojn\u00eb nj\u00eb t\u00eb t\u00ebr\u00eb […]. Kurr\u00eb dy en\u00eb t\u00eb thyera nuk ngjiten p\u00ebr faktin se rrijn\u00eb nj\u00ebra p\u00ebrkrah tjetr\u00ebs, n\u00eb \u00e7ift. Presupozimi i lidhjes s\u00eb mir\u00eb n\u00eb dashuri \u00ebsht\u00eb q\u00eb \u00e7ift\u00ebzimi t\u00eb mos jet\u00eb prej dy \u201cgjysmave\u201d, por prej dy t\u00eb t\u00ebrave\u00bb (A. TODISCO, Rimedi per il mal d\u2019amore, Milano, Mondadori, 1991, 182).
\n36. B. HUME, Operai del vangelo, vep.cit., 32.
\n37. GJON PALI II, Nxitja Apostolike Pastores dabo vobis, vep.cit., n. 43.
\n38. S. ROSSETTI, \u00abFrom Anger to Gratitude-Becoming a Eucharistic People: The Journey of Human Formacion\u00bb, conference e mbajtur nga Universiteti Papnor Gregorian, m\u00eb 26\/03\/2004, dor\u00ebshkrim (origjinali anglisht).
\n39. GJON PALI II, Nxitja Apostolike Pastores dabo vobis, vep.cit., n. 44. Ne tekst \u00ebsht\u00eb shkrimi korsiv (i pjerr\u00ebt).
\n40. A. TAPKEN, \u00abL\u2019ingresso in seminario\u00bb, vep.cit., 266.
\n41. A. MANENTI, Vivere gli ideali\/1. Tra paura e desiderio, Bologna, Edb, 1988, 61.
\n42. L.S.KUBIE, \u00abThe Process of Evaluacion of Therapy in Psychiatry\u00bb, n\u00eb Archives of General Psychiatry, 28 (1973) 880-884. P\u00ebr nj\u00eb thellim t\u00eb tem\u00ebs krhs. G.CUCCI, La forza della debolezza, vep.cit., 21-62.
\n43. \u00abT\u00eb g\u00ebzosh (t\u00eb k\u00ebnaqesh)\u00bb n\u00eb kuptimin q\u00eb i jep sh\u00ebn Toma; ai flet p\u00ebr beatitudo si q\u00ebllim i fundit i jet\u00ebs s\u00eb njeriut dhe t\u00eb g\u00ebzimit-k\u00ebnaq\u00ebsis\u00eb si refleks i arritjes s\u00eb nj\u00eb q\u00ebllimi t\u00eb till\u00eb: \u00abK\u00ebnaqja lind nga qet\u00ebsimi i oreksit n\u00eb t\u00eb mir\u00ebn e arritur. Duke mos qen\u00eb, pra, lumturia gj\u00eb tjet\u00ebr ve\u00e7se arritja e s\u00eb mir\u00ebs m\u00eb t\u00eb madhe, nuk mund t\u00eb jet\u00eb lumturia pa k\u00ebnaqjen q\u00eb e shoq\u00ebron\u00bb (Summa Theol., I-II, q. 4, a. 1).
\n44. Summa Theol., I-II, q. 23, a. 1; krhs. Q. 25, a. 3, ad 1um.
\n45. Pasioni, q\u00eb prej shekullit XVII praktikisht asimilohet me termin emocion, \u00ebsht\u00eb p\u00ebrgjigjja e ndjeshme ndaj nj\u00eb stimuli: ajo mund t\u00eb jet\u00eb edhe shum\u00eb e forte, por \u00ebsht\u00eb me nj\u00eb koh\u00ebzgjatje t\u00eb shkurt\u00ebr.
\n46. Katekizmi i Kish\u00ebs Katolike, n. 1767.
\n47. S. ROSSETTI, \u00abFrom Anger to Gratitude\u00bb, vep.cit.
\n48. PO ATY.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

(marr\u00eb nga: Giovanni Cucci SJ – Hans Zollner SJ, CHIESA E PEDOFILIA. UNA FERITA APERTA, Ancora 2010, fq. 57-82). P\u00ebrktheu nga italishtja: Nikolin Sh. L\u00ebmezhi V\u00ebllaz\u00ebria Jeruzalemi i Ri \u02d7 Shkod\u00ebr R\u00ebnd\u00ebsia dhe nevoja e nj\u00eb formimi t\u00eb nj\u00ebsuar dhe t\u00eb plot\u00ebsuar, i aft\u00eb, pra, t\u00eb prek\u00eb aspektet kryesore t\u00eb jet\u00ebs s\u00eb atij\/asaj q\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":29441,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-29440","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-artikuj"],"yoast_head":"\nP\u00ebr nj\u00eb formim t\u00eb plot\u00ebsuar - FJALA e LIR\u00cb<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/jehonashqiptare.al\/fjala\/per-nje-formim-te-plotesuar\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"P\u00ebr nj\u00eb formim t\u00eb plot\u00ebsuar - FJALA e LIR\u00cb\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"(marr\u00eb nga: Giovanni Cucci SJ – Hans Zollner SJ, CHIESA E PEDOFILIA. 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