{"id":41090,"date":"2019-05-11T00:51:25","date_gmt":"2019-05-10T22:51:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.fjala.info\/?p=41090"},"modified":"2019-05-11T00:51:25","modified_gmt":"2019-05-10T22:51:25","slug":"kete-e-them-vetem-per-ty","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jehonashqiptare.al\/fjala\/kete-e-them-vetem-per-ty\/","title":{"rendered":"K\u00ebt\u00eb e them vet\u00ebm p\u00ebr ty!"},"content":{"rendered":"

Nga Aurel Dasareti<\/strong>, USA, ekspert i shkencave ushtarake-psikologjike<\/em> (dasaretiaurel@yahoo.com.au<\/a>)<\/p>\n

Njohurit\u00eb e mia mbi personalitetin dhe \u00e7\u00ebshtjet ve\u00e7an\u00ebrisht narcisiste, m\u00eb b\u00ebjn\u00eb t\u00eb kuptoj shum\u00eb nga mekanizmat q\u00eb karakterizojn\u00eb sjelljen e njer\u00ebzve, p\u00ebrfshir\u00eb at\u00eb t\u00eb Edi Kristaq Ram\u00ebs. Pse ai mund t\u00eb mbetej Kryeminist\u00ebr p\u00ebr aq koh\u00eb sa ai b\u00ebri, pse ai mund t\u00eb manipulonte dhe akoma i manipulon t\u00eb gjith\u00eb p\u00ebrreth tij.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

* * *<\/p>\n

\u00cbsht\u00eb shum\u00eb interesante t\u00eb p\u00ebrshkruhet funksionimi politik n\u00eb Shqip\u00ebri. Kuptimi se si nj\u00eb mbret i vet\u00eb-shpallur si Rama mund t\u00eb zhvillonte nj\u00eb loj\u00eb t\u00eb till\u00eb p\u00ebr aq koh\u00eb sa ai b\u00ebri me skenat e tij t\u00eb zhveshura n\u00eb plazhet e nudist\u00ebve. Sikur t\u00eb mos kishin dal n\u00eb sken\u00eb Kanabizimi i Vendit, v\u00ebllaz\u00ebria me \u00e7etnikun Vu\u00e7ic, dhe bashk\u00ebpunimi me Baton Stanishi\u00e7 dhe Hashim Tha\u00e7i p\u00ebr cop\u00ebtimin e Kosov\u00ebs, ai ende do t\u00eb kishte statusin e hartuesit dhe kryeministrit t\u00eb \u201cmrekulluesh\u00ebm\u201d! Sot ai shfaqet si kloun, njashtu si\u00e7 faktikisht \u00ebsht\u00eb. Dhunti t\u00eb bashk\u00eblindura k\u00ebto.<\/p>\n

Me nj\u00eb gjendje t\u00eb till\u00eb t\u00eb vet\u00eb-konstruktuar, ai mashtroi shumic\u00ebn q\u00eb votuan p\u00ebr t\u00eb, u verbuan nga madh\u00ebshtia e tij e rreme. Para s\u00eb gjithash, njer\u00ebzit e mediave, q\u00eb propaganduan me zell \u201cshk\u00eblqesin\u00eb\u201d e tij.<\/p>\n

Nj\u00eb fasad\u00eb e nd\u00ebrtuar mbi g\u00ebnjeshtra, mashtrime dhe shp\u00ebrdorime, i manipuloi\/mashtroi ata q\u00eb kishin di\u00e7ka p\u00ebr t\u00eb fituar (status t\u00eb \u201cfamsh\u00ebm\u201d, lek, karrier\u00eb t\u00eb pamerituar…) ose q\u00eb do sh\u00ebrbenin n\u00eb interes t\u00eb Ram\u00ebs. \u201cMbretit\u201d. Rama e p\u00ebrdori k\u00ebt\u00eb fasad\u00eb t\u00eb rreme p\u00ebr t\u00eb dal\u00eb si krye-bashkiak i t\u00eb gjith\u00eb krye-bashkiak\u00ebve t\u00eb komunave, jo vet\u00ebm n\u00eb Tiran\u00eb. Por si gjithmon\u00eb, ajo q\u00eb duket shum\u00eb e mir\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb qen\u00eb e v\u00ebrtet\u00eb, zakonisht nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb e v\u00ebrtet\u00eb. P\u00ebrve\u00e7 disa projekteve t\u00eb vogla, ai d\u00ebshtoi n\u00eb t\u00eb gjitha si nj\u00eb.<\/p>\n

Por arriti nj\u00eb lloj “statusi Zot” p\u00ebr banor\u00ebt dhe aparatin politik, deri n\u00eb nivelin e Kryeministrit. Ajo gjithashtu b\u00ebri q\u00eb r\u00ebnia t\u00eb ishte shum\u00eb m\u00eb e madhe, jo vet\u00ebm p\u00ebr Ram\u00ebn, por edhe p\u00ebr ata q\u00eb u manipuluan p\u00ebr t\u00eb besuar n\u00eb k\u00ebshtjell\u00ebn e tij t\u00eb fantazis\u00eb. Un\u00eb do ta quaja k\u00ebt\u00eb lloj t\u00eb t\u00eb menduarit p\u00ebr t\u00eb \u201cmenduarit magjik\u201d, aq tipik p\u00ebr njer\u00ebzit narcisist\u00eb q\u00eb vuajn\u00eb nga \u00c7rregullime t\u00eb personalitetit.<\/p>\n

Rama \u00ebsht\u00eb cinik, jasht\u00ebzakonisht manipulues dhe padyshim i mungon ndjeshm\u00ebri, nd\u00ebrsa zakonisht e percepton veten si viktim\u00eb. N\u00eb diskutimet dhe vendimet e rasteve ai pret p\u00ebr t\u00eb par\u00eb se nga cila an\u00eb fryn era, para se t\u00eb marr\u00eb an\u00ebn. Dhe kur ai hyn n\u00eb loj\u00eb p\u00ebr nj\u00eb rast, \u00ebsht\u00eb rrall\u00eb n\u00eb terren t\u00eb hapur.<\/p>\n

Ky nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb kryeminist\u00ebr vizionar si\u00e7 ai paraqet vetveten, por \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb sfungjer social i pasigurt, q\u00eb nd\u00ebrtohet mbi pun\u00ebn e t\u00eb tjer\u00ebve. Ai preferon t\u00eb drejtoj\u00eb loj\u00ebn e tij kund\u00ebr individ\u00ebve, bindjeve, zhvatjes n\u00eb \u201cdhoma\u201d p\u00ebr llafosje. Zhvat\u00ebs, q\u00eb me dredhi dhe forc\u00eb merr nga t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt di\u00e7ka q\u00eb nuk i takon. Ai \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb shum\u00eb i frik\u00ebsuar nga humbja e fytyr\u00ebs (q\u00eb ai fantazon se e ka) sesa nga shqet\u00ebsimi i gj\u00ebrave q\u00eb ai \u00ebsht\u00eb i pasionuar, aq tipik p\u00ebr dinamik\u00ebn narcisiste. Prandaj nga \u201cturpi\u201d q\u00eb t\u00eb ik (si\u00e7 k\u00ebrkon popullata), \u00ebsht\u00eb n\u00eb gjendje t\u00eb filloj Luft\u00ebn e kat\u00ebr Bot\u00ebrore. Por ama kur n\u00ebp\u00ebr plazhe i nxirrte byth\u00ebt cullak nuk turp\u00ebroheshe aspak, ani se ishte burr\u00eb \u2013 plak.<\/p>\n

Nj\u00eb tjet\u00ebr karakteristik\u00eb tipike e Ram\u00ebs \u00ebsht\u00eb kombinimi i zem\u00ebrimit dhe arti p\u00ebr t\u00eb luajtur rolin e viktim\u00ebs, k\u00ebt\u00eb paq\u00ebndrueshm\u00ebri emocionale. Kur t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt nuk ia plot\u00ebsojn\u00eb qejfin e tij, ai fillon t\u00eb qaj p\u00ebr simpati dhe dhembshuri. Ai luan n\u00eb emocionet e mjedisit. Privat si publik. Ai dehet dhe drogohet n\u00eb shk\u00eblqimin e p\u00ebrpjekjeve t\u00eb t\u00eb tjer\u00ebve, por ai vet\u00eb pothuajse nuk ka b\u00ebr\u00eb asgj\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb mir\u00ebn e vendit, p\u00ebrkundrazi \u00ebsht\u00eb duke e shitur dhe shkat\u00ebrruar t\u00ebr\u00ebsisht. Manipulimi i tij: “K\u00ebt\u00eb e them vet\u00ebm p\u00ebr ty\u00bb, krijon pritshm\u00ebri (false) p\u00ebr individin p\u00ebrkat\u00ebs, i cili mendon se merr trajtim t\u00eb posa\u00e7\u00ebm dhe \u00ebsht\u00eb i r\u00ebnd\u00ebsish\u00ebm. Viktimat duhet t`i binden, n\u00eb t\u00eb nj\u00ebjt\u00ebn koh\u00eb q\u00eb ai i tradhton n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00ebn m\u00eb t\u00eb vrazhd\u00eb.<\/p>\n

Arroganca e Ram\u00ebs q\u00eb e shohim qart\u00eb shfaqet n\u00eb deklaratat e tij: “Burgu, burgu, burgu n\u00ebse nuk b\u00ebn\u00eb si\u00e7 them un\u00eb, ky mendim nuk m\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb kujtuar fare”. Arroganca e till\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb mbrojtje psikologjike dhe lind kur p\u00ebrvoja e realitetit shtremb\u00ebrohet.<\/p>\n

Fakti q\u00eb ai shpesh si i vog\u00ebl ndoshta ishte l\u00ebn\u00eb n\u00eb vetvete \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb tipar q\u00eb shohim rreth k\u00ebtij lloji t\u00eb problemit. Si t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt me t\u00eb nj\u00ebjtin problem, ai pretendon se kishte nj\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebri t\u00eb mir\u00eb, por si u b\u00eb k\u00ebshtu, si erdhi n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb derexhe sh\u00ebndet\u00ebsore? Elementet e marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieve n\u00eb rrethin\u00ebn k\u00ebrkojn\u00eb fshehje.<\/p>\n

Madh\u00ebsia e sjelljes s\u00eb tij mashtruese \u00ebsht\u00eb shpesh nj\u00eb shprehje e Formimit t\u00eb reagimit, shprehjes s\u00eb t\u00eb kund\u00ebrt\u00ebs si droj\u00eb dhe ankth shoq\u00ebror. Ai nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt, ata ekzistojn\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb. Tipike p\u00ebr parazit\u00eb social\u00eb q\u00eb kan\u00eb shum\u00eb pak mjeshtri, por jan\u00eb t\u00eb shpejt\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb marr\u00eb nderimin p\u00ebr zot\u00ebrimin e t\u00eb tjer\u00ebve. Ai i shtyn t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt para vetes dhe u jep atyre p\u00ebrgjegj\u00ebsi kur gj\u00ebrat shkojn\u00eb keq, dhe i shtyn prapa vetes kur gj\u00ebrat shkojn\u00eb mir\u00eb.<\/p>\n

\u201cUn\u00eb dua, por nuk mundem ta b\u00ebj\u00eb\u201d, tipike p\u00ebr funksionimin e Ram\u00ebs. Kjo konfirmon paaft\u00ebsin\u00eb (mos-kompetenc\u00ebn) themelore t\u00eb tij. Jasht\u00eb (n\u00eb opinion) kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb keqkuptuar si nj\u00eb aft\u00ebsi p\u00ebr t\u00eb vepruar. Shprehja e tij tipike: “Kazan, gomar, ziliqar, i dyshimt\u00eb, skeptik p\u00ebr \u00e7do gj\u00eb t\u00eb re”.<\/p>\n

Prandaj, shum\u00eb njer\u00ebz naiv\u00eb jan\u00eb t\u00eb impresionuar me at\u00eb q\u00eb Rama – Synon t\u00eb krijoj\u00eb! P\u00ebrs\u00ebri, mendimi magjik dhe imagjinata jan\u00eb m\u00eb p\u00ebrfaq\u00ebsuese t\u00eb Ram\u00ebs sesa aft\u00ebsia p\u00ebr t\u00eb arritur di\u00e7ka, implementimi. Projektet jan\u00eb k\u00ebshtjella ajrore. Niveli i lart\u00eb i ambicies, n\u00eb p\u00ebrpjes\u00ebtim t\u00eb kund\u00ebrt me nivelin e zbatimit. Shkurt e shqip: ai \u00ebsht\u00eb mosp\u00ebrfill\u00ebs, aq ia pret lla\u00e7ka, e ka goj\u00ebn e madhe dhe njer\u00ebzit besonin n\u00eb t\u00eb.<\/p>\n

\u00cbsht\u00eb nj\u00eb g\u00ebnjeshtar kronik, jo drejtp\u00ebrs\u00ebdrejti, por n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00ebn tipike delikate q\u00eb karakterizon gjysm\u00eb-t\u00eb v\u00ebrteta, narcist\u00ebsh. Por, si gjithmon\u00eb, kur keni k\u00ebt\u00eb lloj dinamike, nevojiten mb\u00ebshtet\u00ebs t\u00eb till\u00eb. Pa p\u00ebrkrah\u00ebs t\u00eb till\u00eb naiv\u00eb, nj\u00eb person si Rama nuk do t\u00eb ishte n\u00eb gjendje t\u00eb vazhdonte me at\u00eb sjellje t\u00eb d\u00ebmshme p\u00ebr kaq gjat\u00eb. Vler\u00ebsim im i p\u00ebrgjithsh\u00ebm: Kjo sjellje e tij n\u00eb faz\u00ebn m\u00eb dramatike q\u00eb kalon Shqip\u00ebria, Kosova dhe trojet tjera shqiptare n\u00eb k\u00ebto vitet e fundit, mund t\u00eb shkaktoje d\u00ebme prej m\u00eb t\u00eb paimagjinueshm\u00ebve p\u00ebr Vendin dhe Kombin, n\u00ebse sa m\u00eb par\u00eb nuk t\u00ebrhiqet nga politika. Rama ik!<\/p>\n

Mediat i lejuan vetes t\u00eb p\u00ebrdor\u00ebn nga Rama si idiot\u00eb t\u00eb dobish\u00ebm. Ashtu si shum\u00eb raste tjera t\u00eb k\u00ebtij lloji t\u00eb personaliteteve, kritika \u00ebsht\u00eb e ndaluar dhe shkakton agresion. “R\u00ebnkimi \u00ebsht\u00eb i ndaluar”- sipas logjik\u00ebs s\u00eb Kryeministrit aktual t\u00eb Shqip\u00ebris\u00eb.<\/p>\n

Duhet t\u00eb jemi naiv t\u00eb mos kuptojm\u00eb se Rama ka probleme serioze. Ai thjesht nuk e kupton se vizioni i tij po rrotullohet. Rama duket si nj\u00eb narcisist i madh\u00ebrish\u00ebm q\u00eb p\u00ebrdor \u00e7do gj\u00eb dhe gjithk\u00ebnd p\u00ebr k\u00ebnaq\u00ebsin\u00eb e vet. Ai p\u00ebrdor t\u00eb tjer\u00eb, madje edhe t\u00eb gjith\u00eb shtetin p\u00ebr k\u00ebnaq\u00ebsin\u00eb e tij. Ai g\u00ebnjen dhe mashtron, b\u00ebn (ndikon) q\u00eb edhe t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt t\u00eb g\u00ebnjejn\u00eb e mashtrojn\u00eb. Ai nuk ka ndjeshm\u00ebri, \u00ebsht\u00eb tep\u00ebr egocentrik. Ai tregon mohimin n\u00eb nj\u00eb nivel t\u00eb s\u00ebmur\u00eb, dhe jeton n\u00eb nj\u00eb bot\u00eb me fantazi q\u00eb vet\u00ebm ai e kupton.<\/p>\n

Ai shtremb\u00ebron realitetin q\u00eb t`i p\u00ebrshtatet imagjinat\u00ebs s\u00eb tij. \u00cbsht\u00eb nj\u00eb mjesht\u00ebr i manipulimit, antenat e tij sociale kufizohen n\u00eb egocentrizmin e vet. Ai duket hipokrit pa kufizime n\u00eb aft\u00ebsin\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb par\u00eb se \u00e7far\u00eb dhimbje po shkakton ndaj t\u00eb tjer\u00ebve. Ua prish\u00eb sht\u00ebpit\u00eb fukarenjve. Sulmon me gaz helmues. Ai arrin t’i b\u00ebj\u00eb t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt t\u00eb ndiejn\u00eb fajin p\u00ebr t\u00eb cilin ai vet\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb p\u00ebrgjegj\u00ebs.<\/p>\n

Nevojat e tij madhore jan\u00eb t\u00eb dukshme dhe morbid\u00eb n\u00eb karakterin e tyre, aft\u00ebsia e tij p\u00ebr t\u00eb kuptuar realitetin dob\u00ebsohet nga imagjinata e tij madhore. Ai shpreh d\u00ebshir\u00ebn p\u00ebr t’i b\u00ebr\u00eb t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt p\u00ebrgjegj\u00ebs, por kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb vet\u00ebm nj\u00eb mashtrim p\u00ebr t\u00eb k\u00ebnaqur nevojat e tij.<\/p>\n

Kontradiktat n\u00eb sjellje dhe n\u00eb t\u00eb folur jan\u00eb tipike p\u00ebr problemin narcisist. Dhe derisa dikush t\u00eb vendos\u00eb at\u00eb q\u00eb ata thon\u00eb se e b\u00ebjn\u00eb, me at\u00eb q\u00eb ata aktualisht b\u00ebjn\u00eb, narcist\u00ebt e k\u00ebtij soji mund t\u00eb vazhdojn\u00eb me shfaqjen e tyre cinike. Frika m\u00eb e madhe e narcisistit \u00ebsht\u00eb vetmia. Vetmia e burgut do t\u00eb jet\u00eb e v\u00ebshtir\u00eb p\u00ebr Ram\u00ebn n\u00eb t\u00eb ardhmen. Por jo vet\u00ebm p\u00ebr t\u00eb.<\/p>\n

\u00cbsht\u00eb e \u00e7uditshme t\u00eb shoh\u00ebsh se si mb\u00ebshtet\u00ebsit e k\u00ebtij narcisti shkat\u00ebrrues akoma po k\u00ebrkojn\u00eb konfirmimin e mir\u00ebkuptimit t\u00eb tyre, sikur t\u00eb ishin zhdukur t\u00eb gjitha aft\u00ebsit\u00eb e t\u00eb menduarit kritik. \u00cbsht\u00eb tragjedi kur njeriu shpesh gjen m\u00eb shum\u00eb nga ajo q\u00eb k\u00ebrkon, sesa at\u00eb q\u00eb nuk dinte se ekziston.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Nga Aurel Dasareti, USA, ekspert i shkencave ushtarake-psikologjike (dasaretiaurel@yahoo.com.au) Njohurit\u00eb e mia mbi personalitetin dhe \u00e7\u00ebshtjet ve\u00e7an\u00ebrisht narcisiste, m\u00eb b\u00ebjn\u00eb t\u00eb kuptoj shum\u00eb nga mekanizmat q\u00eb karakterizojn\u00eb sjelljen e njer\u00ebzve, p\u00ebrfshir\u00eb at\u00eb t\u00eb Edi Kristaq Ram\u00ebs. Pse ai mund t\u00eb mbetej Kryeminist\u00ebr p\u00ebr aq koh\u00eb sa ai b\u00ebri, pse ai mund t\u00eb manipulonte dhe akoma […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":35915,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-41090","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-artikuj"],"yoast_head":"\nK\u00ebt\u00eb e them vet\u00ebm p\u00ebr ty! - FJALA e LIR\u00cb<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/jehonashqiptare.al\/fjala\/kete-e-them-vetem-per-ty\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"K\u00ebt\u00eb e them vet\u00ebm p\u00ebr ty! - FJALA e LIR\u00cb\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Nga Aurel Dasareti, USA, ekspert i shkencave ushtarake-psikologjike (dasaretiaurel@yahoo.com.au) Njohurit\u00eb e mia mbi personalitetin dhe \u00e7\u00ebshtjet ve\u00e7an\u00ebrisht narcisiste, m\u00eb b\u00ebjn\u00eb t\u00eb kuptoj shum\u00eb nga mekanizmat q\u00eb karakterizojn\u00eb sjelljen e njer\u00ebzve, p\u00ebrfshir\u00eb at\u00eb t\u00eb Edi Kristaq Ram\u00ebs. 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