{"id":41386,"date":"2019-05-21T16:29:12","date_gmt":"2019-05-21T14:29:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/fjala.info\/?p=41386"},"modified":"2019-05-21T16:29:12","modified_gmt":"2019-05-21T14:29:12","slug":"te-ishte-loder-e-verber-e-eres","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jehonashqiptare.al\/fjala\/te-ishte-loder-e-verber-e-eres\/","title":{"rendered":"T\u00eb ishte lod\u00ebr e verb\u00ebr e er\u00ebs"},"content":{"rendered":"

fragment nga romani PUTHJE E PAMUNDUR<\/strong> me rastin e 15 vjetorit t\u00eb botimit.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

KRISTAQ TURTULLI<\/strong><\/p>\n

Ajo si erdhi iku, se ndjeva dhe as e pash\u00eb. U rr\u00ebqetha dhe, m\u00eb duket e pamundur p\u00ebr puthjet si nj\u00ebzet e pes\u00eb vjet m\u00eb par\u00eb…<\/p>\n

…F\u00ebmij\u00eb arrakat\u00eb kemi qen\u00eb ne, \u00e7amarrok\u00eb t\u00eb vegj\u00ebl t\u00eb lagjes s\u00eb vjet\u00ebr t\u00eb ‘\u00c7ezmave t\u00eb reja’. Bridhnim zhurmsh\u00ebm dhe t\u00eb shkujdesur skut\u00eb m\u00eb skut\u00eb, g\u00ebrmadh\u00eb m\u00eb g\u00ebrmadh\u00eb, qilar m\u00eb qilar. P\u00ebrmbysnim kazan\u00ebt e plehrave, mblidhnim kuti konserve, shishe plastike t\u00eb shtypura, ndyra, t\u00eb hedhura rr\u00ebmujsh\u00ebm an\u00ebs trotuareve. Q\u00ebllonim drejt e n\u00eb kok\u00eb me gur\u00eb t\u00eb rrumbullak\u00ebt minjt\u00eb e m\u00ebdhenj boj\u00eb hiri, teksa zgjasnin kokat majuce nga vrimat e ngushta t\u00eb qilar\u00ebve. Mb\u00ebrthenim p\u00ebr zverku macet kobashe dhe flaknim prej katit t\u00eb dyt\u00eb. P\u00ebr t\u00eb gjetur se ku fshihej shpirti i dymb\u00ebdhjet\u00eb i tyre. Po ku, ato mjaullinin me potere dhe zhdukeshin sakaq. Fshehtazi pa zhurm\u00eb kacavirreshim n\u00ebp\u00ebr drur\u00ebt frutor\u00eb t\u00eb sanatoriumit, dendeshim me moll\u00eb, pjeshka dhe kajsi.<\/p>\n

Dallohesha mes shok\u00ebsh p\u00ebr trazova\u00e7e dhe shkatht\u00ebsi. I fshihesha mjesht\u00ebrisht roj\u00ebs s\u00eb sanatoriumit, nj\u00eb burri t\u00eb gjat\u00eb, si g\u00ebrdall\u00eb, mjek\u00ebr \u00e7eki\u00e7. Ne f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e m\u00ebhall\u00ebs e th\u00ebrrisnin me \u2018dashamir\u00ebsi\u2019:<\/p>\n

“Mama dhi”.
\nPor kjo ndodhte vet\u00ebm kur largoheshim nga territori i rreziksh\u00ebm, dhe krahu i tij i gjat\u00eb.
\nAto vite t\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebris\u00eb ishin koh\u00eb t\u00eb shkujdesura pa zap e pa stap. Bridhnim me potere n\u00ebp\u00ebr sokak\u00eb. N\u00eb duar mbanim nj\u00eb \u00e7ap\u00eb buk\u00eb that\u00eb, t\u00eb na skuqeshin faqet. Her\u00eb me sheqer e me uj\u00eb, ose vaj kikiriku me krip\u00eb. Flaknin sandalet diku n\u00eb qoshe dhe luanim zbathur me top prej lecke.
\nPor nj\u00eb dit\u00eb e pat\u00ebm v\u00ebrtet pisk. \u2018Mama dhia\u2019 na p\u00ebrgjoi i fshehur, kur ne hip\u00ebm n\u00ebp\u00ebr pem\u00eb dhe t\u00eb shkujdesur po mbushim xhepat dhe kanatjeret me pjeshka. \u2018Mama dhia\u2019 u shfaq befasisht si katana, dhe b\u00ebrtiti me sa z\u00eb kishte n\u00eb kok\u00eb:
\n– Dreq\u00ebr t\u00eb vegj\u00ebl, po ju kapa do ju b\u00ebj pestil.
\n– Mama dhia,- b\u00ebrtit\u00ebm ne t\u00eb lemerisur dhe u var\u00ebm me zhurm\u00eb nga pem\u00ebt.<\/p>\n

Un\u00eb vrapoja sa m\u00eb hanin k\u00ebmb\u00ebt si i \u00e7akardisur, p\u00ebr t\u00eb mos r\u00ebn\u00eb n\u00eb duart e pam\u00ebshirshme t\u00eb”mama dhis\u00eb”. Hapat e tij gj\u00ebmonin mbas meje, zemra m\u00eb harbonte n\u00eb gjoks. Pa e b\u00ebr\u00eb t\u00eb gjat\u00eb shtyva der\u00ebn, u fsheha n\u00eb nj\u00eb dhom\u00eb t\u00eb ve\u00e7uar, larg godin\u00ebs masive t\u00eb spitalit, fare pran\u00eb pem\u00ebve frutore. Nga plasat e der\u00ebs v\u00ebshtroja vrapimin dhe shfryrjen e t\u00ebrbuar t\u00eb roj\u00ebs s\u00eb tmerrshme “mama dhi”. Ai u v\u00ebrtit nj\u00eb cop\u00eb her\u00eb, duke shfryr\u00eb dhe r\u00ebnkuar. M\u00eb pas u largua tutje, mes drur\u00ebve duke tundur kryet me inat . Mora frym\u00eb i leht\u00ebsuar, m\u00eb n\u00eb fund u gremis tutje \u2018mama dhi.\u2019 Gjuh\u00ebn e kisha t\u00eb thar\u00eb, kafshova pjeshk\u00ebn dhe goja m’u mbush me l\u00ebngun e \u00ebmb\u00ebl. \u00c7\u2019faj kishim ne q\u00eb na p\u00eblqenin pjeshkat, dardhat dhe kajsit\u00eb! Prind\u00ebrit nuk kishin aq t\u00eb holla sa t\u00eb blinin p\u00ebr ne pjeshka dhe kajsi. Kafshova pjeshk\u00ebn prap\u00eb dhe u ktheva ngadal\u00eb duke u p\u00ebrtypur ngesh\u00ebm. Pjeshka ishte e mrekullueshme ia vlente t\u00eb rrezikoje.<\/p>\n

Tre hapa larg meje mbi tavolin\u00eb dallova di\u00e7ka t\u00eb mbuluar me \u00e7ar\u00e7af t\u00eb bardh\u00eb. Gjith\u00eb shkujdesje u afrova. E zbulova. U mpiva. Pjeshka e th\u00ebrrmuar m\u00eb shkau nga goja dhe u rrokullis n\u00eb kanotiere. I gozhduar, pa mundur t\u00eb l\u00ebvizja duar e k\u00ebmb\u00eb, as qerpik\u00ebt, v\u00ebshtroja. P\u00ebrpara meje q\u00ebndronte nj\u00eb njeri i shtrir\u00eb, nj\u00eb krah ndehur drejt meje. Ishte nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb e bukur flok\u00ebverdh\u00eb. Dukej sikur flinte, pas nj\u00eb lodhje t\u00eb gjat\u00eb.<\/p>\n

Isha gati t\u00eb kthehesha t\u00eb vrapoja jasht\u00eb, drejt mama dhis\u00eb. Mbas nj\u00eb cop\u00eb here e mora veten. Vajza ishte shum\u00eb e bukur, p\u00ebrse duhej t\u00eb trembesha! U ktheva mekanikisht, th\u00ebrrmijat e pjeshk\u00ebs m\u00eb v\u00ebrtiteshin n\u00ebp\u00ebr gjuh\u00eb. Zgjata dor\u00ebn e preka ta zgjoja. Ndjeva ftoht\u00ebsin\u00eb e mermert\u00eb. U drodha. Qerpik\u00ebt e saj t\u00eb gjat\u00eb krijonin hije t\u00eb leht\u00eb si tastiera piano mbi moll\u00ebza.<\/p>\n

Isha i bindur, vajza flinte. Por ajo ishte krejt lakuriq, mbuluar me nj\u00eb \u00e7ar\u00e7af t\u00eb holl\u00eb, n\u00eb ambient t\u00eb ftoht\u00eb pa diell!
\nNdjeva nj\u00eb far\u00eb keqardhje p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb moskok\u00eb\u00e7arje t\u00eb pam\u00ebshirshme t\u00eb njer\u00ebzve. Ishte pa dyshim e dhimbshme, p\u00ebr njeriun q\u00eb flinte, si dhe p\u00ebr t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt q\u00eb e kishin l\u00ebn\u00eb ashtu. Nj\u00eb lakuriq\u00ebsi e zbeht\u00eb dhe indiferenc\u00eb e plot\u00eb…<\/p>\n

Mbi t\u00eb gjitha nuk kisha par\u00eb kaq af\u00ebr dhe ngesh\u00ebm nj\u00eb fem\u00ebr lakuriq dhe paturp\u00ebsisht duke treguar gjith\u00e7ka, q\u00eb kushdo mundet ta fsheh\u00eb me sa mundet. P\u00ebrpara se ta zgjoja, duhej ta k\u00ebqyrja me nge. Ajo ishte aq e bukur, si nj\u00eb lule pranvere. Qerpik\u00ebt e saj vazhdimisht t\u00eb l\u00ebshonin hije mbi mol\u00ebzat e zbehta, si nj\u00eb sinfoni e pandier\u00eb. Mora guximin, duardridhur preka gjoksin e vog\u00ebl, m’u duk shum\u00eb i fort\u00eb dhe tmerr\u00ebsisht i akullt. Nuk i vura r\u00ebnd\u00ebsi dhe faj vajz\u00ebs s\u00eb bukur. K\u00ebshtu lakuriq n\u00eb ambientin e ftoht\u00eb nuk kishte si t\u00eb ndodhte ndryshe. E akullt e larg\u00ebt e pakuptueshme. Matan\u00eb rrug\u00ebs d\u00ebgjova ul\u00ebrima dhe dallova v\u00ebrdallosjen e nervozuar t\u00eb roj\u00ebs s\u00eb spitalit, \u2018mama dhi\u2019. N\u00ebnqesha i k\u00ebnaqur me t\u00ebrbimin e roj\u00ebs s\u00eb spitalit dhe u mb\u00ebshteta pas murit me ndjenj\u00ebn e frik\u00ebs, se ndoshta roj\u00ebs i shkrepej, shtynte der\u00ebn, hynte rr\u00ebmujsh\u00ebm brenda, zgjonte vajz\u00ebn e bukur prej gjumit. Mama dhia u p\u00ebrdrodh mes pem\u00ebve frutore dhe humbi tutje.<\/p>\n

U afrova kujdessh\u00ebm drejt lakuriq\u00ebsis\u00eb fem\u00ebrore, shtrir\u00eb aty mbi tavolin\u00eb. Fillova ta prekja, pa i v\u00ebn\u00eb r\u00ebnd\u00ebsi ftohjes s\u00eb moll\u00ebzave t\u00eb gisht\u00ebrinjve. V\u00ebrtet nuk isha plot\u00ebsisht i rritur, por dhe f\u00ebmij\u00eb nuk isha sepse kisha ndjer\u00eb s\u00eb thelli hovet e brendshme trupore. \u00c7u\u00e7urisnim qosheve me shok\u00ebt, qeshnim me z\u00eb, kur dallonim f\u00ebrf\u00ebritje apo zbulim kofsh\u00ebsh. Nj\u00eb dit\u00eb pata v\u00ebn\u00eb bast me nj\u00eb shok, p\u00ebr t\u00eb vrojtuar kujdessh\u00ebm n\u00ebn fustanin e Kostaqes, pastrueses s\u00eb shkoll\u00ebs. Sipas fjal\u00ebve besohej se ajo nuk mbante asnj\u00ebher\u00eb mbathje. Bastin e fitova, v\u00ebrtet nuk mbante mbathje. Mes shal\u00ebve dallova di\u00e7ka tmerr\u00ebsisht t\u00eb err\u00ebt. Nuk munda t\u00eb zhbiroja gjat\u00eb, mbasi Kostaqja u kthye e t\u00ebrbuar nga un\u00eb:<\/p>\n

– U b\u00ebre ti spurdhjak t\u00eb gremisesh n\u00ebn fustanet e grave,- b\u00ebrtiti dhe q\u00eb q\u00eblloi me fshes\u00eb pas kok\u00ebs, gati sa u gremisa n\u00ebp\u00ebr shkall\u00eb.
\nNj\u00eb hop m\u00eb mb\u00ebrtheu drith\u00ebrima. Kjo vajz\u00eb ishte v\u00ebrtet shum\u00eb e bukur. Isha plot\u00ebsisht i bindur, nuk m\u00eb kishin z\u00ebn\u00eb kurr\u00eb syt\u00eb t\u00eb till\u00eb d\u00eblir\u00ebsi, ndoshta bukurin\u00eb ia shtonte lakuriq\u00ebsia e shpenguar, pa kok\u00eb\u00e7arje. Mbase vajza ishte m\u00ebrzitur s\u00eb fshehuri n\u00ebn petka trupin e derdhur si mermer. K\u00ebshtu i shkrepi n\u00eb kok\u00eb, t\u00eb futej n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb dhom\u00eb t\u00eb m\u00ebnjanuar, t\u00eb zhvishej krejt lakuriq, t\u00eb shtrihej mbi k\u00ebt\u00eb tavolin\u00eb. E at\u00ebher\u00eb kur ndjeu se po m\u00ebrdhinte u mbulua me \u00e7ar\u00e7af.<\/p>\n

I shtr\u00ebngova gjirin e plot\u00eb, dallova moll\u00ebzat e gisht\u00ebrinjve q\u00eb ngel\u00ebn mbi t\u00eb. Me siguri duhej t\u00eb kishte pir\u00eb ila\u00e7 p\u00ebr gjum\u00eb, p\u00ebrderisa nuk ndjeu shtr\u00ebngimin e gisht\u00ebrinjve t\u00eb mi. N\u00eb fillim prekjen dhe v\u00ebzhgimin e vajz\u00ebs e mora si lod\u00ebr, befasi e k\u00ebndshme, t\u00eb pa hasur kurr\u00eb m\u00eb par\u00eb. Sigurisht p\u00ebr mendimin tim ishte nj\u00eb privilegj i jasht\u00ebzakonsh\u00ebm. Krejt ndryshe nga zhbirimi i trembur, nga posht\u00eb fustanit t\u00eb pastrueses, apo nga nj\u00eb trazim i rr\u00ebmbyer i ndonj\u00eb \u00e7apa\u00e7uleje t\u00eb klas\u00ebs. Ky ishte nj\u00eb hap i hatash\u00ebm, p\u00ebr t\u00eb shqyrtuar gjith\u00e7ka q\u00eb nuk mundja m\u00eb par\u00eb. P\u00ebr t\u00eb gjith\u00eb shok\u00ebt e mi ishte pamund\u00ebsi. I preka flok\u00ebt e gjat\u00eb e t\u00eb verdh\u00eb, m’u duk sikur k\u00ebrcit\u00ebn, l\u00ebshuan nj\u00eb shk\u00ebndijim nd\u00ebr gisht\u00ebrinj, aq sa u tremba dhe nxitimthi largova dor\u00ebn.<\/p>\n

Kaq mjekim i fort\u00eb p\u00ebr gjum\u00eb t\u00eb ishte vall\u00eb sa vajza s’po zgjohej, t\u00eb v\u00ebshtronte p\u00ebrreth dhe pranin\u00eb e dikujt q\u00eb k\u00ebqyrte lakuriq\u00ebsin\u00eb e shkujdesur dhe marramend\u00ebse!<\/p>\n

V\u00ebshtrova hijen q\u00eb krijonin qerpik\u00ebt e gjat\u00eb mbi moll\u00ebza, nuk m\u00eb ngjan\u00eb m\u00eb si tastiera pianoje, hija po shtrihej ngadal\u00eb, po b\u00ebhej gjithnj\u00eb e m\u00eb sunduese. I preka moll\u00ebzat, si ta largoja k\u00ebt\u00eb hije, t\u00eb ishte e ndritshme si m\u00eb par\u00eb. Gisht\u00ebrinjt\u00eb e mi shkan\u00eb lehtazi gati pa ndjer\u00eb mbi hund\u00ebn e drejt\u00eb, t\u00eb gdhendur, l\u00ebviz\u00ebn pak m\u00eb posht\u00eb, but\u00eb, \u00ebmb\u00ebl mbi buz\u00ebt e plota, t\u00eb zbehta, t\u00eb ftohta. Gisht\u00ebrinjt\u00eb q\u00ebndruan nj\u00eb cop\u00eb her\u00eb aty, me drith\u00ebrim\u00eb t\u00eb leht\u00eb, me habi, me ndrojtje, si p\u00ebr t\u00eb v\u00ebrtetuar plot\u00ebsisht n\u00eb ishin prej mishi, apo prej di\u00e7kaje tjet\u00ebr, q\u00eb e b\u00ebnte t\u00eb pazb\u00ebrthyeshme, ashtu si\u00e7 flinte tmerr\u00ebsisht t\u00eb larg\u00ebt, e jo p\u00ebrballt\u00eb, n\u00eb nj\u00eb ambient kaq t\u00eb ngusht\u00eb.<\/p>\n

P\u00ebr her\u00eb t\u00eb par\u00eb n\u00eb jet\u00ebn time po ndjeja topitje t\u00eb gjithanshme dhe d\u00ebshir\u00eb t\u00eb \u00e7akorduar nj\u00ebher\u00ebsh…Sikur isha tjet\u00ebr njeri dhe jo ai djalk\u00eb i \u00c7ezmave t\u00eb reja, q\u00eb kisha mbushur me pjeshka kanotier\u00ebn e vjet\u00ebr dhe t\u00eb shqyer tek cepi nga nxitimi kacavjerr\u00ebs nga pema, q\u00eb vrapova sa m\u00eb hanin k\u00ebmb\u00ebt prej frik\u00ebs s\u00eb mama dhis\u00eb.<\/p>\n

Nj\u00eb \u00e7ast m\u00eb mb\u00ebrtheu frika. Po sikur vajza t\u00eb zgjohej, t\u00eb m\u00eb sulej me t\u00ebrs\u00ebll\u00ebm e pa p\u00ebrmbajtur e fyer, ngaq\u00eb un\u00eb po i trazoja pa takt qet\u00ebsin\u00eb dhe gjumin. Fytyra e saj do t\u00eb tjet\u00ebrsohej nga marazi, do t\u00eb b\u00ebrtiste me t\u00eb madhe e mund t\u00eb m\u00eb zg\u00ebrlaqte me gjith\u00eb rroba. Por ajo p\u00ebrs\u00ebri q\u00ebndronte pa l\u00ebvizur, e zhveshur e pap\u00ebrs\u00ebritshme e mrekullueshme, magjiplot\u00eb, indiferente, provokuese, si nj\u00eb shtatore antikiteti dhe un\u00eb kisha koh\u00eb q\u00eb ta sodisja me nge.<\/p>\n

Me siguri doza e ila\u00e7it p\u00ebr gjum\u00eb ishte shum\u00eb e fort\u00eb, ndaj e mposhta frik\u00ebn. Me than\u00eb t\u00eb drejt\u00ebn s’do t\u00eb kisha kuraj\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00ebrballesha me k\u00ebt\u00eb fem\u00ebr, pa\u00e7ka se ishte krejt\u00ebsisht lakuriq. Mbi t\u00eb gjitha do t\u00eb ishte ndjenja e fajit.<\/p>\n

Nuk kisha guxim t’i prekja flok\u00ebt p\u00ebrs\u00ebri, m\u00eb trembte shk\u00ebndijimi. U zgjata ngadal\u00eb, me shum\u00eb kujdes, me frik\u00ebn e zgjimit t\u00eb vajz\u00ebs dhe p\u00ebrgjegj\u00ebsis\u00eb s\u00eb fajit, vendosa buz\u00ebt mbi cepin e buz\u00ebve t\u00eb saj. U largova vrulltas. S’u ndje asnj\u00eb reagim. At\u00ebher\u00eb mora guximin dhe i puthita buz\u00ebt mbas buz\u00ebve t\u00eb saj. \u00c7udit\u00ebrisht nuk ndjeva asgj\u00eb p\u00ebrve\u00e7 nj\u00eb akullsie t\u00eb lemerishme. Ishte puthja e par\u00eb, buz\u00eb p\u00ebr buz\u00eb, ndaj faj\u00ebsova mosnjohjen time dhe asgj\u00eb m\u00eb shum\u00eb… megjithat\u00eb nuk guxoja ta puthja m\u00eb. Gjithsesi at\u00eb \u00e7ast puthjet buz\u00eb p\u00ebr buz\u00eb m’u duk\u00ebn marroke, t\u00eb pakuptimta, p\u00ebrderisa ishin aq t\u00eb ftohta, t\u00eb shp\u00eblara. Buz\u00ebt e plota t\u00eb vajz\u00ebs m’u duk\u00ebn t\u00eb njomura, t\u00eb dridhshme, ankuese…<\/p>\n

Gati harrova dim\u00ebrimin e buz\u00ebve t\u00eb vajz\u00ebs, t\u00eb cilat nga ftoht\u00ebsia m\u00eb ngjasuan me cop\u00ebrat e akullit, q\u00eb k\u00ebpusnim nga streha e sht\u00ebpis\u00eb, i l\u00ebpinim gjith\u00eb k\u00ebrsh\u00ebri, aq sa na mpiheshin buz\u00ebt, dh\u00ebmb\u00ebt dhe na digjte gryka. Edhe pse nuk ndjenim ndonj\u00eb shije t\u00eb ve\u00e7ant\u00eb, p\u00ebrs\u00ebri i l\u00ebpinim me ngulm. L\u00ebpirja vazhdonte derisa akulli shkrihej dhe uji na hynte tin\u00ebzisht n\u00eb m\u00ebng\u00eb…<\/p>\n

Nj\u00eb hop m’u b\u00eb sikur vajza po p\u00ebrp\u00ebliste qerpik\u00ebt e gjat\u00eb, gati sa nuk m\u00eb ngriu gjaku nga frika. B\u00ebra tre hapa prapa. shpina m’i ngjesh mbas murit t\u00eb pa suvatuar. Sikur ajo t\u00eb ngrihej dhe t\u00eb gremisej drejt meje? T\u00eb b\u00ebrtiste, t\u00eb m\u00eb hak\u00ebrrohej:
\n– Mistrec i prap\u00eb, \u00e7do k\u00ebtu! P\u00ebrse ma prishe qet\u00ebsin\u00eb? Hajt gremisu!
\nPse jo, mund t’i mi ngulte prej inatit dhe gisht\u00ebrinjt\u00eb n\u00eb fyt. Un\u00eb arrakati i pabindur i lagjes s\u00eb \u00c7ezmave t\u00eb reja do t\u00eb p\u00ebrp\u00eblitesha fare pran\u00eb lakuriq\u00ebsis\u00eb, si nj\u00eb zog i trembur e pa shpres\u00eb. Hutimi t’i shkurton krah\u00ebt.<\/p>\n

Prita nj\u00eb cop\u00eb her\u00eb. Asgj\u00eb nuk ndodhi. Vajza vazhdonte t\u00eb q\u00ebndronte shtrir\u00eb, krejt zbuluar, me \u00e7ar\u00e7afin, q\u00eb ia kisha flakur nd\u00ebr k\u00ebmb\u00eb. P\u00ebrderisa po shqyrtoja ngesh\u00ebm e me q\u00ebllim nudizmin e femr\u00ebs, nuk isha m\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00eb q\u00eb kacavirresha n\u00ebp\u00ebr pem\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb vjedhur pjeshka. Duhej t\u00eb mblidhja veten, ndryshe t\u00eb ikja me vrap e t\u00eb lija k\u00ebt\u00eb vajz\u00eb qet\u00ebsisht. Mora guximin iu afrova s\u00ebrish. P\u00ebrs\u00ebri habia m\u00eb cytt\u00eb n\u00eb mendime, si mund t\u00eb q\u00ebndronte kaq gjat\u00eb, zhveshur dhe t\u00eb mos ndjente ftoht\u00eb! E puthura ishte e fort\u00eb, si t\u00eb ndjeja njom\u00ebsin\u00eb e buz\u00ebve t\u00eb saj. Kaq e v\u00ebshtir\u00eb ishte puthja! Vet\u00ebtimthi m\u00eb mbiu nj\u00eb mendim. Preka me kujdes trupin e vajz\u00ebs qe nga majat e gisht\u00ebrinjve t\u00eb k\u00ebmb\u00ebve, n\u00eb gjunj\u00ebt, kofsh\u00ebt. N\u00eb vendin vezak, sekret dhe me qime t\u00eb buta si t\u00eb kadifenjta. Aty dor\u00ebn e mbajta me gjat\u00eb si t\u00eb gjeja magjin\u00eb e fshehur. Pastruesja e kishte ndryshe, bubuzhele, si t\u00eb shkalafitur dhe tmerr\u00ebsisht t\u00eb err\u00ebt! Shk\u00ebndijimi i qimeve t\u00eb buta, t\u00eb vendit sekret, prej prekjeve t\u00eb mia m\u00eb verboi dhe un\u00eb u shkunda. Doja t\u00eb vija dor\u00ebn p\u00ebrs\u00ebri aty, nuk guxoja. K\u00ebshtu shk\u00ebndijojn\u00eb vendet sekrete t\u00eb femrave!<\/p>\n

Vajza kishte koh\u00eb q\u00eb q\u00ebndronte e ngrir\u00eb, pal\u00ebvizur, pafrym\u00eb. Nd\u00ebrkoh\u00eb dita po thyhej. Dhoma kish vet\u00ebm nj\u00eb dritare t\u00eb vog\u00ebl, krah murit t\u00eb lart\u00eb t\u00eb spitalit. Drita dep\u00ebrtonte si e mekur, ambienti po p\u00ebrmbytej ngadal\u00eb prej territ. Trupi i lakuriqt\u00eb i vajz\u00ebs, dukej sikur po zhvendosej, po largohej flluidsh\u00ebm, mb\u00ebshtjell\u00eb me err\u00ebsir\u00eb.<\/p>\n

E dridhura mi mb\u00ebrtheu fillimisht majat e k\u00ebmb\u00ebve, u p\u00ebrhap me shpejt\u00ebsi n\u00eb gjith\u00eb trupin. \u00c7’mund t\u00eb b\u00ebnte kjo vajz\u00eb gjith\u00eb nat\u00ebn e zhveshur, mbuluar me nj\u00eb \u00e7ar\u00e7af fare t\u00eb holl\u00eb! Ta haj\u00eb dreqi, a mund t\u00eb ishte kaq budallaqe kjo vajz\u00eb e bukur. Ajo nuk duhej t\u00eb q\u00ebndronte kurrsesi k\u00ebshtu e zhveshur, p\u00ebr or\u00eb t\u00eb t\u00ebra, n\u00eb nj\u00eb dhom\u00eb shum\u00eb t\u00eb ftoht\u00eb. D\u00ebshira p\u00ebr t\u00eb zgjuar ishte shum\u00eb m\u00eb e fort\u00eb se gjith\u00e7ka tjet\u00ebr, ndaj e shkunda nga shpatullat. Vajza nuk u zgjua!
\n– Zgjohu,- i thash\u00eb z\u00eb ul\u00ebt,- t\u00eb lutem zgjohu.<\/p>\n

Si t\u00eb ik, si ta l\u00eb vet\u00ebm t\u00eb pa zgjuar! Dhoma po p\u00ebrfshihej nga nj\u00eb err\u00ebsir\u00eb e madhe. M\u00eb mb\u00ebrtheu ankthi. Ngrita \u00e7ar\u00e7afin e mbulova, duke e v\u00ebshtruar me frik\u00eb dhe me keqardhje vajz\u00ebn e hijshme. Eca nxitimthi s\u00eb prapthi. Hapa der\u00ebn. Dola. Befas u gjenda n\u00eb duart eshtake t\u00eb mama dhis\u00eb.<\/p>\n

– T\u00eb zura zuzar, – hung\u00ebriti mama dhia dhe m\u00eb sp\u00ebrkati me p\u00ebshtym\u00eb.
\n– M\u00eb zure, – fola i p\u00ebrhumbur.
\n– Dreq i vog\u00ebl ishe fshehur n\u00eb dhom\u00ebn e t\u00eb vdekurve h\u00eb, kujtoje se do t\u00eb m\u00eb shp\u00ebtoje.
\nTrupi m’u drodh si gjeth dhe murmurita me naivitet.
\n– Aty ishte nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb.
\n– \u00c7far\u00eb!-ia pat mama dhia dhe ia plasi t\u00eb qeshurit me t\u00eb madhe: Me t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet po rritet nj\u00eb brez i \u00e7mendur. \u00c7far\u00eb doje t\u00eb gjeje zotrote aty, Ufo?<\/p>\n

Roja vazhdonte t\u00eb qeshte me t\u00eb madhe, gisht\u00ebrinjt\u00eb po dob\u00ebsonin shtr\u00ebngimin prej supeve t\u00eb mia. U shk\u00ebputa me vrull dhe ia krisa vrapit. Mama dhia as q\u00eb \u00e7au kryet p\u00ebr ikjen time, vazhdonte t\u00eb qeshte pa nd\u00ebrprerje.<\/p>\n

P\u00ebr t\u00eb larguar topitjen dhe t\u00eb papritur\u00ebn, hipa n\u00eb murin e lart\u00eb t\u00eb sanatoriumit, k\u00ebrceva furish\u00ebm prej aty, p\u00ebr pak sa nuk ndrydha k\u00ebmb\u00ebn. Turravrap n\u00eb \u00e7ezmat e reja. Futa duart n\u00eb ujin e rrjedhsh\u00ebm, fillova t’i kruaja mbas postafit me furi, f\u00ebrkova fytyr\u00ebn, buz\u00ebt, duke p\u00ebrhapur gjithandej c\u00ebrka p\u00ebshtyme.<\/p>\n

Dreqi ta haj\u00eb, murmurisja me vete, pa nd\u00ebrprerjeje, a ishte e mundur, nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb kaq e bukur t\u00eb ishte e vdekur! M\u00eb b\u00ebhej sikur mama dhia ishte tallur keqas me mua, sepse sipas arsyetimit tim, vajza ishte aq e paqme dhe e hijshme sa me s’b\u00ebhej…<\/p>\n

Von\u00eb m\u00eb ra mendja, e kur pyeta me imt\u00ebsi. Dhoma e ve\u00e7uar ishte morgu i spitalit, ku liheshin t\u00eb s\u00ebmur\u00ebt e vdekur nga turbekulozi. Aq m\u00eb tep\u00ebr kjo holl\u00ebsi nuk kishte si t\u00eb dihej, mbasi mbi der\u00eb ishte shkruar pakujdessh\u00ebm n\u00eb nj\u00eb tabel\u00eb fibre “Dhoma e analizave”.
\nThell\u00eb ndjeva pendes\u00eb q\u00eb isha lar\u00eb me kruar dhunsh\u00ebm, nga prekjet dhe puthjet q\u00eb i pata dh\u00ebn\u00eb asaj krijese lakuriqe. Edhe pse e vdekur ishte mrekulli, nj\u00eb \u00ebnd\u00ebrr. Qen\u00eb prekjet dhe puthjet e para. Ndoshta s’ishte e vdekur. Mbase vegim…<\/p>\n

Kor\u00e7\u00eb, 1997 – Toronto, 2004<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

fragment nga romani PUTHJE E PAMUNDUR me rastin e 15 vjetorit t\u00eb botimit. KRISTAQ TURTULLI Ajo si erdhi iku, se ndjeva dhe as e pash\u00eb. U rr\u00ebqetha dhe, m\u00eb duket e pamundur p\u00ebr puthjet si nj\u00ebzet e pes\u00eb vjet m\u00eb par\u00eb… …F\u00ebmij\u00eb arrakat\u00eb kemi qen\u00eb ne, \u00e7amarrok\u00eb t\u00eb vegj\u00ebl t\u00eb lagjes s\u00eb vjet\u00ebr t\u00eb ‘\u00c7ezmave […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":41395,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2,8,11],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-41386","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-artikuj","category-letersi","category-roman"],"yoast_head":"\nT\u00eb ishte lod\u00ebr e verb\u00ebr e er\u00ebs - FJALA e LIR\u00cb<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/jehonashqiptare.al\/fjala\/te-ishte-loder-e-verber-e-eres\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"T\u00eb ishte lod\u00ebr e verb\u00ebr e er\u00ebs - FJALA e LIR\u00cb\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"fragment nga romani PUTHJE E PAMUNDUR me rastin e 15 vjetorit t\u00eb botimit. KRISTAQ TURTULLI Ajo si erdhi iku, se ndjeva dhe as e pash\u00eb. U rr\u00ebqetha dhe, m\u00eb duket e pamundur p\u00ebr puthjet si nj\u00ebzet e pes\u00eb vjet m\u00eb par\u00eb… …F\u00ebmij\u00eb arrakat\u00eb kemi qen\u00eb ne, \u00e7amarrok\u00eb t\u00eb vegj\u00ebl t\u00eb lagjes s\u00eb vjet\u00ebr t\u00eb ‘\u00c7ezmave […]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/jehonashqiptare.al\/fjala\/te-ishte-loder-e-verber-e-eres\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"FJALA e LIR\u00cb\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/facebook.com\/fjala.info\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:author\" content=\"https:\/\/facebook.com\/shkoder.net\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2019-05-21T14:29:12+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/jehonashqiptare.al\/fjala\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/kristaq_turtulli_puthje_e_pamundur.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"600\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"993\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@https:\/\/twitter.com\/acokaj\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@acokaj\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"15 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jehonashqiptare.al\\\/fjala\\\/te-ishte-loder-e-verber-e-eres\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jehonashqiptare.al\\\/fjala\\\/te-ishte-loder-e-verber-e-eres\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"admin\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jehonashqiptare.al\\\/fjala\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/9c9fccf4f6449d25e258607d9b4275cb\"},\"headline\":\"T\u00eb ishte lod\u00ebr e verb\u00ebr e er\u00ebs\",\"datePublished\":\"2019-05-21T14:29:12+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jehonashqiptare.al\\\/fjala\\\/te-ishte-loder-e-verber-e-eres\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":2982,\"commentCount\":0,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jehonashqiptare.al\\\/fjala\\\/te-ishte-loder-e-verber-e-eres\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jehonashqiptare.al\\\/fjala\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2019\\\/05\\\/kristaq_turtulli_puthje_e_pamundur.jpg\",\"articleSection\":[\"Artikuj\",\"Let\u00ebrsi\",\"Roman\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/jehonashqiptare.al\\\/fjala\\\/te-ishte-loder-e-verber-e-eres\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jehonashqiptare.al\\\/fjala\\\/te-ishte-loder-e-verber-e-eres\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jehonashqiptare.al\\\/fjala\\\/te-ishte-loder-e-verber-e-eres\\\/\",\"name\":\"T\u00eb ishte lod\u00ebr e verb\u00ebr e er\u00ebs - 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KRISTAQ TURTULLI Ajo si erdhi iku, se ndjeva dhe as e pash\u00eb. 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