Kristaq Turtulli<\/b><\/p>\n
59 dollar\u00eb dhe 99 cent bleva buqet\u00ebn me lule pik\u00ebrisht n\u00eb dyqanin ku Merita shqeu sy\u00e7kat e bukura nga habia:
\n\u2018Ua, n\u00ebne, t\u00eb shtrenjta qenkan lulet e fresk\u00ebta!\u2019 Klithi.
\n\u2018Lulet e fresk\u00ebta dhe nuse bardhat sigurisht jan\u00eb t\u00eb shtrenjta,\u2019 i thash\u00eb buzagaz.
\nAjo f\u00ebrkoi hund\u00ebn vog\u00ebl, majuce dhe m\u00ebrm\u00ebriti:
\n\u2018H\u00ebm, lule jan\u00eb dreqi ta haj\u00eb! Un\u00eb s\u2019do i blija kurr\u00eb…\u2019<\/p>\n
Merita hyri thjesht n\u00eb jet\u00ebn time, shkundi vetmin\u00eb, mol\u00ebn e tmerrshme q\u00eb, g\u00ebrryhen njeriun ngadal\u00eb, pandier\u00eb dhe, n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb pashmangshme. Ngujuar n\u00eb kthin\u00ebn e vog\u00ebl, n\u00ebn dar\u00ebn e fort\u00eb, t\u00eb ftoht\u00eb t\u00eb qytetit t\u00eb madh. Ku ndjehet i tendosur rituali i pandryshuesh\u00ebm; stresi t\u00eb mbash me thonj vendin e pun\u00ebs, ngjitja dhe zbritja n\u00eb trena dhe autobus\u00eb. Gjumi i shqet\u00ebsuar dhe, shum\u00eb gj\u00ebra t\u00eb r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme rr\u00ebshqasin nga mendja. Miqt\u00eb e v\u00ebrtet\u00eb t\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebris\u00eb s\u00eb bashku me lojnat, arg\u00ebtimet dhe sh\u00ebtitjet buz\u00eb mbr\u00ebmjeve n\u00ebn rrug\u00ebn e blir\u00ebve mbet\u00ebn n\u00eb memorie, strukur n\u00eb rrugicat e ngushta me kalldr\u00ebm t\u00eb qytetit t\u00eb dashur.
\nN\u00eb muajt e par\u00eb t\u00eb emigracionit, disa miq t\u00eb rast\u00ebsish\u00ebm m\u00eb p\u00ebrshkruan tavernat me ngjyra t\u00eb ndezura t\u00eb nxitnin kureshtjen time. But\u00ebsisht e, qeshur n\u00ebn buz\u00eb m\u00eb t\u00ebrhoq\u00ebn n\u00eb bodrumet e n\u00ebndheshme t\u00eb lokaleve, p\u00ebrmbytur prej dritave vezulluese, pran\u00eb avullit turbullues s\u00eb rakis\u00eb dhe duhm\u00ebs marramend\u00ebse s\u00eb lakuriq\u00ebsis\u00eb. Nepsi im nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb prer\u00eb p\u00ebr tu shkap\u00ebrderdhur n\u00eb mjedise t\u00eb pista. U t\u00ebrhoqa heshtazi pa e b\u00ebr\u00eb t\u00eb gjat\u00eb…<\/p>\n
N\u00eb kontinentin e larg\u00ebt dhe t\u00eb ftoht\u00eb, vitet rrjedhin pa kuptuar, muajt dhe stin\u00ebt ndjekin rr\u00ebmbyesh\u00ebm nj\u00ebri tjetrin. N\u00ebna u mplak, u rr\u00ebgjua shum\u00eb shpejt. I lutem t\u00eb vij\u00eb te un\u00eb, por ajo nuk do t\u00eb l\u00ebr\u00eb vatr\u00ebn e t\u00eb par\u00ebve. Justifikohet se ka frik\u00eb se mos vdes\u00eb rrug\u00ebs, p\u00ebr turp dhe faqe t\u00eb zez\u00eb, kur avioni t\u00eb jet\u00eb lart n\u00eb kup\u00eb t\u00eb qiellit. Mundohem ti mbush mendjen p\u00ebr leht\u00ebsin\u00eb dhe kushtet e favorshme t\u00eb fluturimit me avion. N\u00ebna nuk tundet nga e saja.<\/p>\n
M\u00eb flet n\u00eb telefon z\u00eb holluar, m\u00eb shkruan shpesh. M\u00eb k\u00ebshillon t\u00eb mos e zgjas, por t\u00eb vendos, t\u00eb krijoj si gjith\u00eb t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt fol\u00ebsen e ngroht\u00eb familjare. Meraku dhe trishtimi i saj \u00ebsht\u00eb i shpallur n\u00eb sy.
\n-Biro, gjej nj\u00eb \u00e7up\u00eb dhe shkujdesu, m\u00eb d\u00ebgjon \u00e7\u2019t\u00eb them? – Ngulmonte n\u00ebna n\u00eb telefon.
\n-Mir\u00eb n\u00ebno,- i thash\u00eb, por s\u2019di si ti shpjegohesha n\u00ebn\u00ebs; gjetja e nj\u00eb njeriu t\u00eb mir\u00eb, t\u00eb lidh\u00ebsh jet\u00ebn nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb kostum me porosi.
\nN\u00ebna ngulmonte n\u00eb t\u00eb saj\u00ebn.
\n-Biro mbushe t\u00eb tridhjetat dhe nj\u00eb qind t\u00eb b\u00ebhesh!- Uron z\u00eb \u00ebmb\u00ebl, gjith\u00eb p\u00ebrd\u00ebllim dhe shton: -S\u2019 ke \u00e7\u2019 pret, hajt, vendos, m\u00eb d\u00ebgjon biro?
\n-T\u00eb d\u00ebgjoj n\u00ebno, t\u00eb d\u00ebgjoj, ja, do gjej ndonj\u00eb indiane, kineze apo xhamajkiane.- I thash\u00eb me shaka dhe shtova: -K\u00ebtu ka me shumic\u00eb; aziatik\u00eb, verdhash\u00eb, zezak\u00eb, ti mbledh\u00ebsh me lopat\u00eb.
\n-U, u, u, \u00e7\u2019 thua k\u00ebshtu bir!- foli n\u00ebna z\u00eb shuar. D\u00ebgjova n\u00eb telefon kap\u00ebrdim\u00ebn e r\u00ebnd\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00ebshtym\u00ebs s\u00eb n\u00ebn\u00ebs n\u00eb stomak. Heshti nj\u00eb cop\u00eb her\u00eb, si\u00e7 duket fshiu buz\u00ebt dhe vazhdoi z\u00ebdredhur: -Posi, posi, t\u00eb njeh n\u00ebna ty t\u00eb njeh, nuk shkel n\u00eb d\u00ebrras\u00eb t\u00eb kalbur. Biro, qyteti yn\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb me nam p\u00ebr vajza t\u00eb bukura, t\u00eb ndershme dhe pun\u00ebtore.
\n-E di, -fola z\u00eb ul\u00ebt. M\u00eb erdh\u00ebn p\u00ebrnj\u00ebher\u00eb n\u00ebp\u00ebr mend vajzat e hijshme t\u00eb qytetit tim dhe nj\u00eb prej tyre Miranda, t\u00eb cil\u00ebn e kisha simpatizuar n\u00eb gjimnaz dhe e putha nj\u00eb buz\u00ebmbr\u00ebmje n\u00eb muzg. U martua dhe iku n\u00eb Australi. I mb\u00ebshtjell\u00eb prej nostalgjis\u00eb dhe pa e kuptuar as vet\u00eb shtova:- At\u00ebher\u00eb n\u00ebn\u00eb m\u00eb gjej nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb si\u00e7 e di vet\u00eb.
\nN\u00ebna u gjall\u00ebrua, z\u00ebri i saj u b\u00eb i mpreht\u00eb.
\n-T\u00eb gjen n\u00ebna ty, -tha dhe shtoi:- Jam plak\u00eb, por kemi plot miq.<\/p>\n
Lidhja me Merit\u00ebn u b\u00eb me rekomandimit e miq\u00ebsis\u00eb dhe t\u00eb fqinj\u00ebsis\u00eb dhe d\u00ebshir\u00ebn e mir\u00eb t\u00eb n\u00ebn\u00ebs. Si\u00e7 ndodh r\u00ebndom me djemt\u00eb e m\u00ebrguar dhjet\u00ebra male, dete, oqeane kaptuar. I than\u00eb n\u00ebn\u00ebs p\u00ebr Merit\u00ebn, vajz\u00ebn e Kumrie Tamburas\u00eb q\u00eb punon n\u00eb post\u00eb. N\u00ebna e p\u00eblqeu e, gjith\u00eb shend e ver\u00eb m\u00eb lajm\u00ebroi t\u00eb shkoj, t\u00eb shoh vajz\u00ebn dhe, p\u00ebr hair qoft\u00eb.<\/p>\n
Takimi me Merit\u00ebn dhe familjen e saj u b\u00eb n\u00eb sht\u00ebpin\u00eb e Lefteris\u00eb fqinj\u00ebs son\u00eb t\u00eb vjet\u00ebr. Merita q\u00ebndronte ulur n\u00eb cep t\u00eb divanit t\u00eb kuq t\u00eb Lefteris\u00eb, veshur me nj\u00eb fustan t\u00eb thjesht\u00eb, me lule por q\u00eb i derdhej bukur n\u00eb trup dhe mbante syt\u00eb p\u00ebrtok\u00eb. E kisha t\u00eb turbullt kujtes\u00ebn p\u00ebr Merit\u00ebn, si\u00e7 ma treguan n\u00eb fotografi me veshje sportive, buz\u00ebqeshje t\u00eb \u00ebmb\u00ebl si n\u00eb kartolina. Ajo jetonte n\u00eb lagjen e lumit por mua m\u00eb binte shum\u00eb rrall\u00eb rruga p\u00ebr andej. N\u00eb takimin dypal\u00ebsh m\u00eb shum\u00eb fol\u00ebn Kumria, n\u00ebna e Merit\u00ebs dhe Lefteria, fqinja jon\u00eb. N\u00ebna luante kryet ngadal\u00eb dhe fshinte lot\u00ebt me cepin e shamis\u00eb s\u00eb bardh\u00eb. Ajo pa u \u00e7mallur mir\u00eb me mua, s\u2019 i durohej t\u00eb m\u00eb tregonte nusen e ardhshme:<\/p>\n
-Biro, t\u00eb ngrohet n\u00ebna e gjor\u00eb me fllad nuseje,- m\u00ebrm\u00ebriti.
\nHesht. M\u00eb r\u00ebndon l\u00ebmshi i madh t\u00eb mallit dhe nostalgjis\u00eb. Merita bardhoshe e kolme, plot vlag\u00eb, afsh, mban kok\u00ebn pak\u00ebs t\u00eb anuar m\u00ebnjan\u00eb. Gjoksi i plot\u00eb ngrihej dhe ulej me shpejt\u00ebsi, buz\u00ebt e plota gjith\u00eb tul, pak\u00ebs t\u00eb hapura. Flok\u00ebt e zinj dhe t\u00eb dredhur i derdheshin si uj\u00ebvar\u00eb. N\u00eb qaf\u00ebn e bukur dhe t\u00eb bardh\u00eb i dallohej nj\u00eb nishan i zi. Pa e kuptuar m\u00eb hipi d\u00ebshira marroqe ti puthja at\u00eb nishan. Ajo puliste qerpik\u00ebt e gjat\u00eb, si krah\u00eb dall\u00ebndyshe dhe e pasigurt shtronte mbi gju pal\u00ebn e fustanit t\u00eb kalt\u00ebr. E v\u00ebshtrova, m\u00eb p\u00eblqeu, e fresk\u00ebt e \u00ebmb\u00ebl, ndez\u00ebtare, me dy grop\u00ebza t\u00eb hijshme n\u00eb faqet e purpurta, s\u2019 kish t\u00eb shar\u00eb. Buz\u00ebqeshte ndrojtur, me shikim but\u00eb n\u00eb dysheme.<\/p>\n
Ceremonia e prezantimit e dy njer\u00ebzve q\u00eb do lidhin jet\u00ebn s\u00eb bashku, p\u00ebrfundoi. P\u00ebrfaq\u00ebsit\u00eb u t\u00ebrhoq\u00ebn me buz\u00ebqeshje mir\u00ebdashje. Na lan\u00eb t\u00eb dalim t\u00eb sh\u00ebtisim, t\u00eb bisedojm\u00eb dhe t\u00eb njihemi mir\u00eb. Dita plot diell, n\u00eb bulevardin kryesor t\u00eb qytetit kan\u00eb shp\u00ebrthyer lulet e blir\u00ebve. Ne ecnim n\u00eb heshtje ngadal\u00eb, krah p\u00ebr krah, n\u00ebn er\u00ebn e mrekullueshme t\u00eb blir\u00ebve dhe, kurmi i saj f\u00ebrg\u00ebllonte. Theva heshtjen dhe nisa ti flas p\u00ebr qytetin e madh, jet\u00ebn e vrullshme, uj\u00ebvar\u00ebn e famsh\u00ebm t\u00eb Niagar\u00ebs, liqenet e ngrira n\u00eb dim\u00ebr. T\u00eb rinj dhe t\u00eb reja luajn\u00eb me patina. Merita d\u00ebgjonte, s\u2019fliste, e ndrojtur por syt\u00eb i vezullonin.<\/p>\n
Lefteria m\u00eb rekomandoi lokalin e fshatit t\u00eb Boboshtic\u00ebs me ambiente t\u00eb qeta dhe intime. Lokali ish v\u00ebrtet interesant dhe karakteristik. Darkuam me mish qengji. Vet\u00ebm un\u00eb flisja, ajo d\u00ebgjonte e p\u00ebrqendruar. M\u00eb nd\u00ebrpriste rrall\u00eb, me pulitjen e pand\u00ebrprer\u00eb t\u00eb qerpik\u00ebve. Kur u ndam\u00eb e pyeta:
\n-Merita d\u00ebshiron t\u00eb jetosh me mua n\u00eb Kanada?
\nNgriti kok\u00ebn vrulltas dhe me l\u00ebvizje nazike hodhi flok\u00ebt m\u00ebnjan\u00eb. M\u00eb v\u00ebshtroi gjat\u00eb dhe luajti kryet n\u00eb shenj\u00eb pohimi. Pohim i \u00e7ilt\u00ebr, s\u2019ka nevoj\u00eb p\u00ebr shum\u00eb fjal\u00eb. E putha leht\u00eb n\u00eb buz\u00ebt tulta. Ajo nuk l\u00ebvizi, q\u00ebndroi symbyllur. E putha p\u00ebrs\u00ebri…<\/p>\n
Pres Merit\u00ebn, ta p\u00ebrqafoj me mall dhe dashuri, t\u00eb puth buz\u00ebt e saj t\u00eb kuqe si dy qershi belice, ti p\u00ebrk\u00ebdhel flok\u00ebt e zinj dhe ka\u00e7urrela, i derdhen n\u00eb shpatullat e hijshme si uj\u00ebvar\u00eb, t\u00eb prehem nj\u00eb cop\u00eb her\u00eb n\u00eb gjoksin e plot\u00eb dhe t\u00eb fort\u00eb. T\u00eb ndjej er\u00ebn e k\u00ebndshme t\u00eb kurmit t\u00eb saj dhe t\u00eb besoj, gjithsecili ka nevoj\u00eb t\u00eb doj\u00eb dhe ta duan.
\nRregulloj me kujdes letr\u00ebn e tejdukshme t\u00eb buqet\u00ebs me karafila dhe tr\u00ebndafila. Bredh v\u00ebshtrimin moskok\u00eb\u00e7ar\u00ebs n\u00eb miz\u00ebrin\u00eb e prit\u00ebsve t\u00eb af\u00ebrmeve t\u00eb tyre, t\u00eb grumbulluar p\u00ebrpara dyerve vet\u00ebl\u00ebviz\u00ebse t\u00eb aeroportit t\u00eb madh. Jeta si gjithnj\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb e ngarkuar me ikje, pritje, takime, \u00e7mallje dhe p\u00ebrqafime. Udh\u00ebtar\u00ebt e lodhur nga fluturimi i gjat\u00eb, t\u00eb r\u00ebnduar nga valixhet, lumturohen kur d\u00ebgjojn\u00eb klithmat e g\u00ebzimit dhe t\u00eb pritjes.<\/p>\n
U mbaj er\u00eb me \u00ebndje karafilave dhe tr\u00ebndafilave. Jan\u00eb t\u00eb fresk\u00ebta. Er\u00ebmir\u00ebn e luleve e ndjejn\u00eb gjith\u00eb prit\u00ebsit, kthejn\u00eb kryet nga un\u00eb kur l\u00ebviz af\u00ebr tyre. B\u00ebj kujdes kur mbledh gishtat rreth buqet\u00ebs, mos zhubros letr\u00ebn e tejdukshme mb\u00ebshtjell\u00ebse dhe l\u00ebviz rr\u00ebshqanthi me frik\u00ebn e p\u00ebrplasjes s\u00eb paparashikuar.
\nBuqet\u00ebn me lule e bleva 59 dollar\u00eb dhe 99 cent n\u00eb dyqanin luksoz t\u00eb luleve \u2018Ada\u2019. Sa her\u00eb b\u00ebnin sh\u00ebtitjen e s\u00eb diel\u00ebs Merita ngadal\u00ebsonte hapat, thithte me etje er\u00ebn e mrekullueshme t\u00eb luleve dhe sodiste me zili karafilat, tr\u00ebndafilat, tulipan\u00ebt, vendosur kujdessh\u00ebm n\u00eb vitrin\u00eb. Habitej me arom\u00ebn dhe freskin\u00eb e tyre, pa\u00e7ka se jasht\u00eb binte bor\u00eb. Por \u00e7mimet e luleve t\u00eb k\u00ebtij dyqani jan\u00eb t\u00eb kripura. Kur p\u00ebrcolla Merit\u00ebn i premtova:
\n-Kur t\u00eb kthehesh do t\u00eb pres me karafilat dhe tr\u00ebndafilat e dyqanit t\u00eb luleve \u2019Ada\u2019.<\/p>\n
Sigurisht, kur t\u00eb vij\u00eb, tu mbaj\u00eb er\u00eb do rrah\u00eb shuplakat dhe do b\u00ebrtas\u00eb prej k\u00ebnaq\u00ebsis\u00eb.
\nIku e p\u00ebrhumbur prej merakut t\u00eb s\u00ebmundjes s\u00eb papritur t\u00eb babait dhe s\u2019m\u00eb ktheu p\u00ebrgjigje.<\/p>\n
Kumria dhe Lefteria m\u00eb k\u00ebshilluan, t\u00eb shpallnin fejes\u00ebn dhe t\u00eb b\u00ebnin celebrimin n\u00eb gjendjen civile, t\u00eb leht\u00ebsoheshin procedurat burokratike t\u00eb t\u00ebrheqjes sa Merit\u00ebs n\u00eb Kanada. Nuk ka kuptim q\u00eb \u00e7ifti i ri t\u00eb q\u00ebndroj\u00eb i larg nj\u00ebri tjetrit. Merita \u00ebsht\u00eb sheg\u00eb e arrir\u00eb.<\/p>\n
N\u00ebna u s\u00ebmur dhe n\u00eb aeroportin e ri t\u00eb Rinasit m\u00eb p\u00ebrcolli Merita. Mu duk shum\u00eb e bukur Merita. Era luante marr\u00ebzisht me flok\u00ebt e zinj dhe ka\u00e7urrela. Pa u larguar ndjeva mall p\u00ebr t\u00eb. U puth\u00ebm, u p\u00ebrqafuam. V\u00ebshtrova ngul\u00ebt fytyr\u00ebn e saj t\u00eb tr\u00ebndafilt\u00eb. Ajo mblodhi supet e hutuar dhe mb\u00ebshteti kok\u00ebn e bukur n\u00eb gjoksin tim. Zemra ime rrahu me vrull…<\/p>\n
N\u00eb krye t\u00eb gjasht\u00eb muajve Merita erdhi n\u00eb Kanada. Zura me qira nj\u00eb dhom\u00eb t\u00eb madhe e nj\u00eb kuzhin\u00eb me pamje piktoreske nga liqeni. T\u00eb gjitha mobiliet, divanet, kolltuk\u00ebt, shtratin e madh, bufen\u00eb, televizorin i bleva n\u00eb dyqanit italian t\u00eb \u2018Lionit\u2019. Mbushja e ambientit me orendi moderne m\u00eb kushtoi, por un\u00eb kam punuar aq sa t\u00eb krijoj kushte t\u00eb mira jetese p\u00ebr veten dhe gruan e re.
\nMerita gjith\u00eb energji. Nj\u00eb fllad i fresk\u00ebt, gjith\u00eb musht dhe jet\u00eb fryu n\u00eb ambientin e rregulluar me shije n\u00eb familjen e re. E regjistrova Merit\u00ebn n\u00eb kursin e p\u00ebrshpejtuar t\u00eb gjuh\u00ebs angleze. Shpesh her\u00eb ajo kaplohej prej mendimeve dhe kur e pyesja me thoshte:<\/p>\n
-S\u2019 \u00ebsht\u00eb e leht\u00eb t\u00eb largohesh prej vendlindjes. M\u00eb z\u00eb malli p\u00ebr familjen sidomos p\u00ebr t\u00eb baban\u00eb, Demirin, kam debules\u00eb.
\nDemiri, burr\u00eb i im\u00ebt, fjal\u00ebpak\u00eb, me sy t\u00eb fryra q\u00eb e ka p\u00ebr zem\u00ebr konjakun dhe f\u00ebrnetin. I dhurova nj\u00eb shishe me konjak, ai m\u00eb v\u00ebshtroi sy t\u00eb rr\u00ebmbushur dhe iku n\u00eb dhom\u00ebn tjet\u00ebr.
\nLodhja e pun\u00ebs dhe stresi e p\u00ebrditsh\u00ebm u fshi si me dor\u00eb. N\u00eb sht\u00ebpi m\u00eb priste nj\u00eb njeri q\u00eb m\u00eb do dhe e dua. Streha e sht\u00ebpis\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb e ngroht\u00eb.<\/p>\n
Nj\u00eb nat\u00eb p\u00ebrpara b\u00ebrjes s\u00eb seksit Merita mu lut t\u00eb jem pak i kujdessh\u00ebm.
\n-S\u2019 ka p\u00ebrse t\u00eb nxitohemi t\u00eb z\u00ebn\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00eb,- m\u00eb tha.
\nE pash\u00eb me habi.
\n– M\u00eb fal, t\u00eb lutem m\u00eb fal,- ia b\u00ebri ajo. M\u00eb rrasi kok\u00ebn e bukur n\u00eb gji dhe shtoi:- T\u00eb shijojm\u00eb mjaltin pa kok\u00eb\u00e7arje…
\nE aprovova pa m\u00ebdyshje. Merita buz\u00ebqeshi e k\u00ebnaqur dhe si nj\u00eb lozonjare u l\u00ebshua e shkujdesur n\u00eb krah\u00ebt e mi. Kam par\u00eb shum\u00eb miq, kan\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00eb, mezi u del t\u00eb paguajn\u00eb morgi\u00e7in, \u00e7erdhet e f\u00ebmij\u00ebve, taksat, punojn\u00eb burr\u00eb e grua me turne t\u00eb kund\u00ebrta. M\u00eb ankohen, p\u00ebr v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsit\u00eb dhe p\u00ebrballonin e jetes\u00ebs.<\/p>\n
Mbas kat\u00ebr muaj duke m\u00eb puthur dhe p\u00ebrdredhur si dhelp\u00ebrushe mu lut ta ndihmova t\u00eb futej n\u00eb nj\u00eb kurs privat t\u00eb plot\u00eb p\u00ebr farmaceutik\u00eb. Pagova p\u00ebr t\u00eb dhjet\u00eb mij\u00eb dollar\u00eb. Parat\u00eb jan\u00eb kurrgj\u00eb n\u00eb krahasim me ndihmes\u00ebn q\u00eb do jap\u00eb n\u00eb t\u00eb ardhmen familjes son\u00eb t\u00eb re. Merita studio me k\u00ebmb\u00ebngulje. Shpesh her\u00eb b\u00ebhej nervoze dhe e paduruar. E qet\u00ebsoja. Ajo g\u00ebzohej dhe m\u00eb puthte fort n\u00eb buz\u00eb.<\/p>\n
Disa trille fem\u00ebrore Merita i fshihte me fanatiz\u00ebm. E v\u00ebshtroja i habitur. M\u00eb puthte cepin e buz\u00ebs, pastaj mi kapte me majat e dh\u00ebmb\u00ebve, p\u00ebrdridhej p\u00ebrpara hund\u00ebs dhe qeshte si \u00e7ilimi. T\u00ebrhiqesha n\u00eb \u00e7ast, nuk m\u00eb dukej fort e hijshme t\u00eb ngulmoja. Do dukesha n\u00eb syt\u00eb e saj nj\u00eb skuth i keq. Zakonisht femr\u00ebs i p\u00eblqen t\u00eb mbaj\u00eb p\u00ebr vete disa sekrete t\u00eb vogla simpatike, p\u00ebr tu b\u00ebr\u00eb pak\u00ebs enigmatike. Qeshja me zem\u00ebrgjer\u00ebsi dhe ajo shkrihej prej k\u00ebnaq\u00ebsis\u00eb.<\/p>\n
N\u00eb ceremonin\u00eb e marrjes s\u00eb certifikat\u00ebs, t\u00eb p\u00ebrfundimit me sukses t\u00eb kursit mora lej\u00eb nga puna. Merita q\u00ebndronte hijsh\u00ebm ulur n\u00eb stol veshur me uniform\u00ebn blu dhe kordele t\u00eb kuqe t\u00eb gradientit dhe m\u00eb p\u00ebrsh\u00ebndeti leht\u00eb me dor\u00eb. M\u00eb shum\u00eb isha un\u00eb i emocionuar se sa ajo. Kur iu thirr emri Merit\u00ebs p\u00ebr t\u00eb marr\u00eb certifikat\u00ebn brofa n\u00eb k\u00ebmb\u00eb i emocionuar duartrokita dhe f\u00ebrsh\u00eblleva. Ajo eci r\u00ebnd\u00eb- r\u00ebnd\u00eb, m\u00eb erdhi p\u00ebr t\u00eb qeshur. Darkuam n\u00eb lokal luksoz, n\u00eb qend\u00ebr t\u00eb qytetit. Pim\u00eb ver\u00eb \u2019Bordo\u2019, lash\u00eb dyqindepes\u00ebdhjet\u00eb dollar\u00eb. T\u00eb dy ardh\u00ebm n\u00eb qejf. Kur hym\u00eb n\u00eb dhom\u00eb Merita m\u00eb k\u00ebrkoi ta mbaja n\u00eb krah\u00eb. E ngrita hopa e putha n\u00eb gush\u00eb. e gudulisa. Por kur u zhvesh\u00ebm lakuriq t\u00eb b\u00ebnim seks, \u00e7udit\u00ebrisht u b\u00eb krejt es\u00ebll. U ngrit vrulltas n\u00eb k\u00ebmb\u00eb, veshi me shpejt\u00ebsi te brendshmet, k\u00ebmish\u00ebn nat\u00ebs dhe m\u00eb kund\u00ebrshtoi prer\u00eb, me ngulm.<\/p>\n
T\u00eb nes\u00ebrmen si zakonisht u ngrita her\u00ebt. Kok\u00ebn e kisha pak t\u00eb r\u00ebnd\u00eb prej ver\u00ebs q\u00eb piva m\u00eb von\u00eb, mbasi kund\u00ebrshtimi i saj m\u00eb m\u00ebrziti. Merita u rrotullua n\u00eb shtrat, futi krahun posht\u00eb jast\u00ebkun, puliti qerpik\u00ebt dhe u shtriq. Ndiqte me v\u00ebmendje l\u00ebvizjet e mia. I thash\u00eb:
\n-Dit\u00ebn e mir\u00eb!<\/p>\n
Ajo luajti kryet dhe f\u00ebrkoi mjekr\u00ebn mbas jast\u00ebkut. Shikimin e kish i zbraz\u00ebt, asnj\u00eb gjurm\u00eb nga euforia e djeshme. Zbrita posht\u00eb, ndeza makin\u00ebn dhe u nisa p\u00ebr n\u00eb pun\u00eb. S\u2019 m\u00eb shqitej prej mendjes ndryshimi i beft\u00eb i Merit\u00ebs p\u00ebr t\u00eb dh\u00ebn\u00eb ngroht\u00ebsi. M\u00eb habiste gjithnj\u00eb me ca ndryshime dhe trille t\u00eb befasishme, sa ndjehesha i p\u00ebshtjelluar. Her\u00eb m\u00eb dukej m\u00eb e brisht\u00eb si nj\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00eb e llastuar. Prekej shpejt dhe p\u00ebr hi\u00e7 mos gj\u00eb, trishtohej e p\u00ebrlotej.<\/p>\n
Kur u ktheva, gjeta Merit\u00ebn n\u00eb kuzhin\u00eb, qante me d\u00ebnes\u00eb. Harrova n\u00eb \u00e7ast m\u00ebrin\u00eb mbr\u00ebmshme. E afrova pran\u00eb, i p\u00ebrk\u00ebdhela flok\u00ebt e but\u00eb si kadife:
\n-P\u00ebrse qan moj zem\u00ebr?- e pyeta.
\nAjo ngriti kok\u00ebn, mjekra i dridhej, prej ngash\u00ebrimit. Fytyra e saj mu duk e zbeht\u00eb dhe syt\u00eb e skuqur. Mu dhimbs gruaja. \u00cbsht\u00eb e tmerrshme kur qan gruaja. I b\u00ebra kafe t\u00eb fort\u00eb dhe prita me gjakftoht\u00ebsi t\u00eb ndalte ngash\u00ebrimin dhe t\u00eb fliste.
\n-Babai, Demiri, \u00ebsht\u00eb i s\u00ebmur\u00eb nga zemra,-m\u00eb n\u00eb fund mora vesh.<\/p>\n
Ah, Demiri, pijetari shembullor i konjakut dhe f\u00ebrnetit.
\nAjo fshiu hund\u00ebt dhe shtoi:
\n-N\u00eb vendlindje mjek\u00ebt t\u00eb shikojn\u00eb duart dhe p\u00ebrkujdesja p\u00ebr t\u00eb s\u00ebmur\u00ebt \u00ebsht\u00eb p\u00ebr faqe t\u00eb zez\u00eb.
\n-Sille k\u00ebtu,- i thash\u00eb pa e zgjatur.
\n-Oh, sa i mir\u00eb je!- ia b\u00ebri Merita u \u00e7el n\u00eb fytyr\u00eb. Brofi prej shtratit dhe mu hodh n\u00eb krah\u00eb.<\/p>\n
T\u00ebrhoqa formular\u00eb nga ambasada, i dhash\u00eb Merit\u00ebs ta mbush\u00eb dhe ti a nis\u00eb menj\u00ebher\u00eb familjes. Kur shkoja n\u00eb pun\u00eb e lija gruan t\u00eb ngrehur. Kontrollonte post\u00ebn dhe q\u00ebndronte n\u00eb pritje t\u00eb telefonatave, p\u00ebr aprovimin e viz\u00ebs s\u00eb t\u00eb atit p\u00ebr t\u00eb ardhur n\u00eb Kanada.
\nViza u aprovua, Merita shkoi me ngut n\u00eb vendlindje t\u00eb sjell\u00eb t\u00eb atin. Un\u00eb t\u00ebrhoqa nga banka dollar\u00ebt e fundit, ti b\u00ebjm\u00eb k\u00ebtu operacionin koronar t\u00eb zemr\u00ebs. E merrja n\u00eb telefon, m\u00eb dilte Kumria, e \u00ebma, m\u00eb fliste me z\u00ebrin si piskam\u00eb, m\u00eb shurdhonte vesh\u00ebt:
\n-S\u2019ka koh\u00eb. Gjysm\u00eb njeri mu b\u00eb njeri \u00e7upa. Kok\u00eb mushk\u00eb, i q\u00ebndron t\u00eb atit n\u00eb spital, nat\u00eb e dit\u00eb. Mu leqendis \u00e7upa…<\/p>\n
V\u00ebshtroj or\u00ebn e dor\u00ebn, po afron koha t\u00eb shfaqet Merita, t\u00eb vrapoj\u00eb e malluar drejt meje. T\u00eb m\u00eb hidhet n\u00eb krah\u00eb, ta puth me zjarr. Jam i emocionuar, e kam nga mall\u00ebngjimi dhe padurimi. Ikja e saj m\u00eb la sht\u00ebpin\u00eb bosh. Nuk thon\u00eb kot, burr\u00eb e grua mish e thua. T\u00eb mos q\u00ebndroj vet\u00ebm n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi, punoj dy turne bashk\u00eb.
\nPi shpejt e shpejt kafen. I hodha dy lug\u00eb sheqer por p\u00ebrs\u00ebri mu duk e hidhur. L\u00eb gjysm\u00ebn pa pir\u00eb dhe me padurim, mbaj syt\u00eb e mb\u00ebrthyer nga dyert e m\u00ebdha l\u00ebviz\u00ebse, ku dalin pa nd\u00ebrprer\u00eb udh\u00ebtar\u00eb.<\/p>\n
U interesova dhe m\u00ebsova; avioni Alitalia, Rom\u00eb-Toronto, ka se tre or\u00eb q\u00eb mb\u00ebrriti n\u00eb aeroport. Merita s\u2019 po duket. \u00c7far\u00eb ti ket\u00eb ndodhur zemr\u00ebs sime t\u00eb dashur?! Mu shtua meraku. Ndoshta vones\u00eb n\u00eb dogan\u00eb, qet\u00ebso veten. Doganier\u00ebt e aeroportit jan\u00eb tmerr\u00ebsisht t\u00eb paduruesh\u00ebm, g\u00ebrmojn\u00eb dhe futin kudo hund\u00ebt kudo, si minj.
\n\u2018Kumria m\u00eb tha, nusen e ke t\u00eb merakosur me s\u00ebmundjen e t\u00eb atit dhe mb\u00ebrritjen,\u2019 m\u00eb tha n\u00ebna n\u00eb telefon.
\n\u2018P\u00ebr mb\u00ebrritjen mos e vras\u00eb mendjen. I rregulloj t\u00eb gjitha un\u00eb. E takove, u \u00e7malle?\u2019 Pyeta n\u00ebn\u00ebn.
\n\u2018K\u00eb, nusen?
\n\u2018Po\u2019
\n\u2018Jo. Ku mblidhet ajo.\u2019
\n\u2018Si k\u00ebshtu?!
\n\u2018Ku di un\u00eb. Erdhi dit\u00ebn e par\u00eb, sa b\u00ebri ku-ku xa dhe s\u2019e pash\u00eb m\u00eb. Po s\u2019 ka faj e gjora. Mendje prishur b\u00ebhet njeriu kur s\u00ebmuret prindi.\u2019
\n\u2018I shkove krushkut p\u00ebr vizit\u00eb.\u2019
\n\u2018Ku ta gjej , m\u00eb than\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb n\u00eb spital, n\u00eb Tiran\u00eb.\u2019
\n\u2018I gjori Demir!\u2019
\n\u2018Ashtu, posi, i gjori Demir? E lakmon t\u00eb shkret\u00ebn raki.\u2019<\/p>\n
Mos ndoshta gjat\u00eb fluturimin i ndodhi Demirit, ndonj\u00eb kriz\u00eb e fort\u00eb e fort\u00eb zemre? Eh \u00e7\u2019 \u00ebsht\u00eb njeriu, flak\u00eb kashte!
\nBuqeta e madhe me lule m\u00eb lodhi krahun, e hodha n\u00eb dor\u00ebn tjet\u00ebr. Prit\u00ebsit kthejn\u00eb kok\u00ebn dhe u mbajn\u00eb er\u00eb luleve t\u00eb buqet\u00ebs sime. L\u00ebviz dhe shp\u00ebrndaj arom\u00eb lule er\u00ebmir\u00eb. Nuk u pendova q\u00eb pagova 59 pes\u00ebdhjet\u00eb dollar\u00eb dhe 99 cent.
\nGishtat q\u00eb mbajn\u00eb t\u00eb shtr\u00ebnguar tuf\u00ebn me karafila dhe tr\u00ebndafila mu qull\u00ebn shpejt, l\u00ebviz\u00ebn pakujdesish mbi mb\u00ebshtjell\u00ebsen e l\u00ebmuar dhe t\u00eb tejdukshme. Fleta u zhubros dhe k\u00ebrciti leht\u00eb. Gishti i vog\u00ebl u pickua dhe u gjakos prej gj\u00ebsendi. As vet\u00eb nuk e mora vesh nga u ndodh ai tel i mpreht\u00eb apo gjemb n\u00eb at\u00eb buqet\u00eb t\u00eb shtrenjt\u00eb me lule kund\u00ebrmuese, q\u00eb p\u00ebrgjaku dor\u00ebn.
\nM\u00eb mb\u00ebrtheu nj\u00eb nervoziz\u00ebm i pakuptuesh\u00ebm. Fshiva gjakun me nj\u00eb cop\u00eb let\u00ebr q\u00eb mu ndodh n\u00eb xhep. L\u00ebviz sa m\u00eb af\u00ebr, mbajt lart mbi kokat e turm\u00ebs buqet\u00ebn me lule. M\u00eb bren meraku i ngjeshjes s\u00eb pakontrolluar t\u00eb tyre.<\/p>\n
Mb\u00ebshtetem n\u00eb kolon\u00ebn e betont\u00eb dhe nuk vendos \u00e7\u2019 duhej t\u00eb b\u00ebj. T\u00eb marr dhe nj\u00eb kafe tjet\u00ebr, por rreziku i pagjum\u00ebsis\u00eb ma largoi k\u00ebt\u00eb d\u00ebshir\u00eb. Dyer hapen dhe mbyllen me shpejt\u00ebsi, dalin udh\u00ebtar\u00eb t\u00eb r\u00ebnduar prej valixheve. Dreqi ta haj\u00eb qenka torturuese pritja. Sidomos kur pret gruan. Sidoqoft\u00eb pritja dhe takimi i af\u00ebrt merr nj\u00eb kuptim t\u00eb madh dhe zemra t\u00eb gufon prej g\u00ebzimit.<\/p>\n
Oh, ja! M\u00eb n\u00eb fund doli Merita t\u00ebrheq pas dy valixhe t\u00eb madha dhe t\u00eb kuqe. Kur iku mori me vete valixhen e vog\u00ebl, blu. Fytyra e Merit\u00ebs duket e skuqur si e flak\u00ebruar dhe, flok\u00eb shpupurishur.
\n-Merita, Merita!- i th\u00ebrres dhe tund buqet\u00ebn me lule. Shtyj me b\u00ebrryla turm\u00ebn dhe turrem drejt saj, ta ndihmoj. Mos m\u00eb lodhet gruaja. Kut ta takoj do ti them.
\n-Merita, t\u00eb porosita disa her\u00eb. Kur t\u00eb vish mos merr asnj\u00eb leck\u00eb me vete. K\u00ebtu jan\u00eb shum\u00eb m\u00eb t\u00eb mira dhe m\u00eb t\u00eb lira. Eh, si jan\u00eb grat\u00eb! Mu qesh. Nuk duhesh tu m\u00ebrzitesh.
\n-Merita!- th\u00ebrres.
\nAjo shkund kok\u00ebn me vrull. M\u00eb hedh v\u00ebshtrim t\u00eb ngrir\u00eb dhe pulit qerpik\u00ebt. Trup tendosur t\u00ebrheq valixhet n\u00eb drejtim t\u00eb kund\u00ebrt.
\n-Hej, Merita!?<\/p>\n
Kaq t\u00eb jet\u00eb hutuar, t\u00eb mos m\u00eb d\u00ebgjoj\u00eb?! Mbase i jan\u00eb shurdhuar vesh\u00ebt Merit\u00ebs nga ai dreq fluturim!? Kot s\u2019 mora lej\u00eb, t\u00eb shkova me t\u00eb. Por menduam q\u00eb lejen time ta konsumojm\u00eb n\u00eb Kub\u00eb. Kur je i vet\u00ebm n\u00eb vend t\u00eb huaj, preokupohesh, e do m\u00eb shum\u00eb njeriun q\u00eb lidh jet\u00ebn. Eh, Merita, Merita, do m\u00eb b\u00ebsh me zem\u00ebr ndonj\u00eb dit\u00eb.
\nAfrohem me ngut dhe q\u00ebndroj p\u00ebrpara saj, i lumturuar.<\/p>\n
-Oh, Merita, m\u00eb n\u00eb fund erdhe,- i them dhe i zgjas buqet\u00ebn me lule. I \u00e7liruar prej ankthit, i malluar hap krah\u00ebt ta p\u00ebrqafoj.
\nMerita ngriu. T\u00ebrheq me forc\u00eb kok\u00ebn prapa. M\u00eb v\u00ebshtron ftoht\u00eb, me eg\u00ebrsi s t\u00eb jem i huaj. Rrotat e vogla t\u00eb valixheve u f\u00ebrkuan ashp\u00ebr pas parketit.
\nAt\u00eb \u00e7ast pran\u00eb nesh u afrua nj\u00eb djal\u00eb i gjat\u00eb, hund\u00ebgjer\u00eb, fytyr\u00eb eg\u00ebr, me nj\u00eb v\u00ebth t\u00eb madh n\u00eb veshin e djatht\u00eb.
\n-Hapna rrug\u00ebn!- m\u00eb hung\u00ebriti.
\n-Hej, po takoj gruan time, – flas i p\u00ebshtjelluar.
\n-Largohu! \u00c7\u2019 grua do t\u00eb takosh ti! – Shkrof\u00ebtiu ai.
\n-Ore, je mir\u00eb nga trut\u00eb ti,- b\u00ebrtas. Goja mu b\u00eb farmak:- Merr vesh, po takoj gruan time?!<\/p>\n
Inati m\u00eb shkund gjoksin. \u00c7\u2019 k\u00ebrkon ky njeri prej meje. Shtr\u00ebngoj grushtet gati p\u00ebr sherr dhe nd\u00ebrkoh\u00eb v\u00ebshtroj p\u00ebrreth mos shoh ndonj\u00eb polic. Merita p\u00ebrgjon e ngrehur v\u00ebshtrimin e tim t\u00eb murr\u00ebtyer. Ma bleu mendjen. Brenda nj\u00eb viti i studioji ligjet kanadeze dhe m\u00eb ka kaluar uj\u00ebt n\u00ebn rrogoz, me telefonatat dhe letrash sekrete. L\u00ebpiu buz\u00ebt e p\u00ebrthara dhe na b\u00ebri me kok\u00eb t\u00eb l\u00ebvizin diku m\u00eb tej
\n-Hajt qet\u00ebsojm\u00eb gjakrat:- P\u00ebshp\u00ebriti dhe eci e para. Rrotat e vogla t\u00eb valixheve u f\u00ebrkuan zhurmsh\u00ebm pas parketit.
\nDiku q\u00ebndroi, hodhi v\u00ebshtrim gjetiu dhe foli z\u00eb ashp\u00ebr, urdh\u00ebrues, t\u00eb huaj p\u00ebr vesh\u00ebt e mi:
\n-Do na \u00e7osh n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi, apo t\u00eb shkojm\u00eb t\u00eb flem\u00eb gjetiu?\u2019<\/p>\n
Merita e brisht\u00eb, delikate q\u00eb trishtohej dhe p\u00ebrlotej p\u00ebr hi\u00e7 mos gj\u00eb, qe b\u00ebr\u00eb e r\u00ebnd\u00eb, autoritare, e paturpshme. Dora m\u00eb djersiu tmerr\u00ebsisht, tuf\u00ebn me karafila dhe tr\u00ebndafila e hodha gjith\u00eb maraz, e ngjesha n\u00eb dor\u00ebn tjet\u00ebr. P\u00ebll\u00ebmba mu shpua, mu p\u00ebrgjak keq. Kap\u00ebrdihem me v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi, p\u00ebrqendroj nervat. Nj\u00eb shkundje e madh po ndodhte. Po p\u00ebrse? Gryka m\u00eb djeg e p\u00ebrv\u00eblon. Z\u00eb t\u00eb mbytur fola:
\n-T\u00eb pres me or\u00eb t\u00eb t\u00ebra… T\u00eb \u00e7oj n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi.
\n-OK. Do t\u00eb vij me \u00c7imin,- u grind ajo.
\n-Po kush \u00ebsht\u00eb ky \u00c7imi ta haj\u00eb dreqi?- G\u00ebrhas me dhembje.<\/p>\n
Rrotat e vogla t\u00eb valixheve f\u00ebrkuan ashp\u00ebr parketin. M\u00eb g\u00ebrryen zorr\u00ebt.
\n-I dashuri im,- d\u00ebgjoj.
\n-\u00c7far\u00eb?!- ia b\u00ebj z\u00ebngjirur. V\u00ebshtroj sy \u00e7ak\u00ebrritur njeriun q\u00eb kam p\u00ebrpara, q\u00eb quhet gruaja ime.
\nMe t\u00ebrbim b\u00ebj shuk buqet\u00ebn me lule t\u00eb fresk\u00ebta, me karafila dhe tr\u00ebndafila, bler\u00eb n\u00eb dyqanin m\u00eb t\u00eb shtrenjt\u00eb, luksoz t\u00eb luleve \u2018Ada\u2019.
\nI thosha asaj: \u2018T\u00eb mbetet e fresk\u00ebt e plot arom\u00eb dashuria jon\u00eb…\u2019
\nPrandaj jan\u00eb t\u00eb shtrenjta.
\nI flaka n\u00eb koshin m\u00eb t\u00eb par\u00eb. Dora mu p\u00ebrgjak s\u00ebrish…<\/p>\n
Mars 2011 – Gusht 2020<\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Kristaq Turtulli tregim 59 dollar\u00eb dhe 99 cent bleva buqet\u00ebn me lule pik\u00ebrisht n\u00eb dyqanin ku Merita shqeu sy\u00e7kat e bukura nga habia: \u2018Ua, n\u00ebne, t\u00eb shtrenjta qenkan lulet e fresk\u00ebta!\u2019 Klithi. \u2018Lulet e fresk\u00ebta dhe nuse bardhat sigurisht jan\u00eb t\u00eb shtrenjta,\u2019 i thash\u00eb buzagaz. Ajo f\u00ebrkoi hund\u00ebn vog\u00ebl, majuce dhe m\u00ebrm\u00ebriti: \u2018H\u00ebm, lule jan\u00eb […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8,12],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-51158","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","category-letersi","category-tregime"],"yoast_head":"\n